webnovel
neoma
neomaLv132yr
2022-01-16 18:40

Started reading this out of curiosity about the MVS prequel. Interesting story! I enjoyed reading it, but I felt the ending was a bit rushed...

Liked by 5 people

LIKE
Replies1
Lazy_Stellar
Lazy_StellarLv4

Can you please say all relations to MVS because it seems like the novel is really a big waste of time, but at the same time, I want to get the answers to all the mysteries

Other Reviews
TheGoodAce
TheGoodAceLv11
GianP
GianPLv6

So I should leave a review since I had great hope for this novel, but was disappointed. I will list the problems: 1. Grammar ...simply, it sucks. I can understand that English is not the author's first language, but there are like 10 grammar mistakes each chapter. Please, use a proofreader it's really distracting from the story. There, they're and their are different. Please learn it. 2. Writing style The limites of the language hits hard in the style department. Since the author doesn't master the language, phrases are always linear and simple, concepts are expressed one at a time etc... This impacts the story since it seems the actors themselves are basic. 3. Plot holes, world building, etc I understand you don't want infodumps, and you also don't want to spoiler the story but... Seriously, try to give a reason for things happening, and not at chapter 1000 since people will not arrive there. Sen is acting like a true 5 yo even being a 1000 yo dragon. Is there a good reason? Maybe. Without explaining, or even an hypotesis, this is simply a plot hole. Whatever is inside the mind of the author doesn't count, only what is written. And don't go "but normal books can explain after 200 pages, why can't I?" Normal books are supposed to be perfect in language use, have been read and revisited multiple time by the author and the editor team, so the reader is somewhat assured that the story is somewhat decent. On webnovel the author publishes BEFORE finishing the story and often before checking for errors. Maybe in chapter 300 the author is like "oooops for plot reason I need this in chapter 30... Too bad it's already published. Let's hope nobody notices" while in a normal book you would go and modify chapter 30 to be coherent. Now, I have gone for a bit of a rant here. TL;DR: the story is simple but ha potential... Wasted because of poor English and oversimplification

El_Shadi
El_ShadiLv13
AshWritesThings
AshWritesThingsLv2
Related Stories

Celestial Bloodline

On a peaceful planet filled with magic and power, Kyle's life was lazy and ordinary, but little did he know, he possessed something extraordinary. He lived his life with his family like any other lazy human, or so he thought, unaware that everything happens for a reason. However, everything changed when he turned sixteen. His older brothers, who were fed up with his laziness, came up with a ridiculous plan to teach him a lesson. They asked him to take the entrance test for one of the biggest academies. They thought this would knock some sense into their lazy brother. Kyle was stunned, but because of their coordinated planning, he reluctantly agreed with a hint of resignation. "I don't think I'll pass the test anyway. So, trying it for the experience isn't a big deal." "The only problem is, I can't guarantee that all my body parts will stay intact until the end of the entrance test." But to Kyle's shock, he passed the test without even lifting a finger! Still, he was convinced that he would eventually be kicked out of the Academy due to his lack of strength. But the moment he set foot in the Academy, he discovered something incredible about himself. He was special and nature's favorite. . . . ______ (#It's my first time writing. So, support me with ps, gt and gifts. Hehe, THANK YOU) (Note: The cover is not mine, found it from pinterest. All credits go to the owner who can ring me up in the comment section if he/she wants me to remove it.) It might be empty right now and maybe needs more work, but there's finally a Discord server! ^^ Link; https://discord.gg/eBBXatxWVb

_Orange_ · Fantasy
4.5
738 Chs