63 Reflections of Pakura

POV Pakura

"Of all the possible things, why did that have to happen?!" I screamed internally as I pressed my face into the pillow, frustrated and alone in the room after the unexpected turn of events.

Things were going great.

I had managed to get closer to Enel than ever before, spending enough alone days with him to feel more comfortable with the idea, and, best of all, he seemed interested too!

Even though Ringo gave me permission, offered some advice, and assured me I had a chance, I still had my own doubts about making a move.

And just when the atmosphere was right, when it was time to gather the courage and be decisive... I sneezed!

A damn sneeze ruined everything!

It was so unexpected that I couldn't even pull my head away, and as I bent down from the reflex, I hit Enel's chin with my forehead due to the height difference.

Now my forehead hurt, and I couldn't look Enel in the eyes!

If only I had sneezed a few minutes later, maybe now I would be...

It's so frustrating!

Well, I guess being in Iwagakure, I couldn't relax enough for what would come next. Or what I hoped would happen.

I feel my face heating up just thinking about it; I don't need to look in a mirror to know I must be red to the ears. But my emotions quickly shifted again.

That little guy couldn't be more obvious about his greed for our things. Honestly, I don't understand why, even if he somehow managed to make those artificial Byakugan, he would sell them to other villages.

The amount of money he's making is huge, but we are few in the village, and I don't think we have such high expenses.

Although I'm still intrigued about why he needs so much gold, maybe for researching some medicine, although I don't understand much about it except for the basic anti-venom training all Sunagakure ninjas receive before graduating.

Speaking of gold, I remember my grandmother telling me about a canyon where large gold veins were found in the past, located in the desert of the Land of Wind. The mines are supposed to be depleted, but maybe it would be a good idea to take a look.

It would be free gold if there were any undiscovered veins left, after all.

It's just that I still want Enel to make a deal with Sunagakure. My old village really needs those funds, and I think if we manage to meet with Elder Chiyo or her brother instead of Rasa, we should be able to channel the money towards orphanages and subsidies for the needy, which Rasa refuses to pay if it means buying a new batch of explosive tags.

It would be my final farewell to Sunagakure, to prevent their orphans from starving. After that, I would cut the last tie with them definitively.

Should I wait until after the deal to mention the existence of the canyon?

In conscience, I can't.

Enel has earned a significant place in my heart, enough for the idea of deceiving him in that way to be tremendously uncomfortable.

Especially imagining the face he would give me if I really did it. Just thinking that I could ruin everything between us and make him treat me with coldness, thinking that I betrayed him, makes me shudder.

No, I have to tell him about the canyon before visiting Sunagakure.

I think... if I tell him about my desire to proceed with the gold deal anyway, he should be able to understand.

I know I'm taking a risk; I'm supposed to ignore anything from my old village the moment I cut the headband in front of him.

But a face kept reappearing in my dreams constantly, causing me to wake up in the middle of the night sometimes and not be able to go back to sleep.

My apprentice, Maki.

I don't know how she took my "death," but I remember she harbored great resentment towards Kirigakure for her father's death, and what happened to me could have caused an even greater hatred.

The idea of taking her away from Sunagakure so she can live in Seimeigakure crossed my mind several times; her fabric technique didn't need the desert environment. But in the end, I could only sigh and shake my head. If nothing else has changed, then she still has to take care of her mother.

I trust Maki; she was a sensible and calm apprentice whose admiration for me undoubtedly surpassed loyalty to Sunagakure. Bringing her if she were alone would have been easy.

But... her mother was the opposite; since her husband's death, she became a great xenophobe who hated anyone not from the village.

Also, I don't know how Maki would react to learning about the existence and position of Ameyuri in the village, even if she is now branded as a renegade kunoichi by Kirigakure.

At least I don't have that title; I'm simply "dead," and nothing more.

(That is, she is considered dead but she is not a renegade)

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PS: This old man is looking for his granddaughter, has anyone seen her?

He says the power stones could help him, always liked shiny things...