funny 2 sentence stories

A: I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. B: She looked surprised.

A: I'm on a whiskey diet. B: I've lost three days already.

I woke up in the middle of the night. My teddy bear was sitting at the edge of my bed smiling at me.

A cat walked into a bar. The barman said, 'We don't serve cats.' The cat said, 'I'm not here for a drink, I'm here to use the Wi - Fi.'

A man goes to the doctor. He says, 'Doctor, I keep seeing spots in front of my eyes.' The doctor replies, 'Have you seen a ophthalmologist?' The man says, 'No, just spots.'

I woke up to find a handprint on my window. It was on the inside.

A successful man will not put his energy on women. He will put his energy on his career. There is nothing more reliable than death in this world. It will not wait for any mistakes or negligence. If a person doesn't know which dock he's heading to, no wind will be favorable. Love is not possession but appreciation. When you fall in love with someone, you should learn to appreciate everything about him, including his shortcomings. There is only one thing in this world that is worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.

I'm an innocent little boy. I only watch cartoons. 2 It's not that I don't want to be a lady, but life has forced me to become a shrew. If I die, the first thing I'll say is, I finally don't have to be afraid of ghosts. If I die, my second sentence is: I hope my family and friends can live well. It's not that I don't want to lose weight, it's just that my weight is not within my tolerance range. If I die, my third sentence is, I finally don't have to be afraid of ghosts anymore. It's not that I don't put on makeup, it's that cosmetics don't have the ability to make me handsome. If I die, my fourth sentence is: I hope my family and friends can live well. It's not that I don't like a wide range of things, but I can only love one. If I die, my fifth sentence is: I hope my family and friends can live well and give them a better future.

I'm a, I'm a fat man, I'm a fat man! Once the two of them fell, no one could pull them back. Give me a chance and I will make you the most handsome man in the world. It's not that I don't want to be a lady, but life has forced me to be a shrew. It's not that I'm obsessed with legends, it's just that legends are too beautiful.

I'm a fan of online literature. Not only can I answer questions about novels, but I can also tell jokes!