webnovel
Quidanstealsnovels
QuidanstealsnovelsLv104yr
2021-02-26 18:22

The quality, grammar etc... are ok. Few mistakes here and there but nothing to take note of. Updates pretty regularly which good sized chapter. The story has picked up a bit in the later chapters but the beginning for me was very slow, lots of small time skips which seemed unnecessary and that didn't really give much information. Either do bigger ones or don't do them at all. I'd rather it just been bigger jumps with a summary of what happened despite the fact nothing really happens, he trains etc... Being a skypiean is a unique start and the author made a lot of effort to get lots of cannon information about them. While referencing some real characters and has good use of original ones as well. Now the biggest gripe I have is with the main character. His personality is everywhere, he's childish sometimes, he's psyco, thinks of others as tools at one stage and then for some reason starts experimenting and being horrible brutal for no real reason, Yet enjoys and takes care of 'family' but yet manipulates them? Honestly it's a mess. The author has had to explain in notes which the big shifts and if a story has to have the author actively explain in order for it to makes sense then it's needs looking at. I'm not even sure where the MC insane personality come from, it's just a mess. Background is pretty good, author does give a lot of back information which is nice. Though like a lot of fanfics you do need some information of the world in question, its always assumed you've read the manga/ anime first. Great novels are written to where someone completely new can follow properly.

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Master4thWall
Master4thWallAuthor

Thanks. Feedbacks are always welcome 👍 It was quite hard to write a 'character' from scratch for a new auger like me. I will use your advice in the future about my Main character(s). Thank you, it will help a lot. 🙏

Other Reviews
Klazy_Labbit
Klazy_LabbitLv5

Author totally didn't force me....... That aside, the book which currently has 21 chapters is coming along well. One piece fics are quite common but ones with mc of different race is not. Joker started it with his mc as a fishmen and wall here started as a skypiean. Writing Quality- Now the writing quality is pretty decent by webnovel standards and other than minor errors, it is pretty good but can be improved. Word count of each chapter is decent with each being 1500+. Stability- I give this five stars as long as author follows schedule they set whatever it may be but wall even offers bonus chapters which is always welcome. Story Development- Story development as of now is slow paced. Mc doesn't grow op quickly and slowly amasses power. While there are timeskips,they are small ones. We slowly explore the world through mc and see him progress which is refreshing when many compared power fantasy fics here. Character Design- The protagonist, Amon is an interesting character. He is a manipulative guy who is power hungry but he is not the cold type. He acts only when something benefits him but also enjoys what he is doing. His interactions with other characters are done well and overall he is an intriguing character. Coming to the side characters, I feel this is where the story takes a hit. The characters appear fine when they interact with mc but appear kinda stiff when on their own. I feel characters can be fleshed out a bit more and since the story is slow paced, there is plenty of room for improvement. World Background- I wouldn't bother much about world background for fanfics but wall has good knowledge of the source and lore. He explains things well and has done a good job exploring the skypieans and the shandia tribe. Overall a pretty decent fic which has gotten off to a good start and has the potential to be better.

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