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HP: The Arcane Thief

Author: Snollygoster
Book&Literature
Ongoing · 17.1M Views
  • 255 Chs
    Content
  • 4.8
    463 ratings
  • NO.121
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Synopsis

[A Thief In a Wizarding World] Thrown out of the Orphanage due to accidental magic at a young age, Axel spent 3 years scraping by, learning to steal in order to survive. But his luck ran out at the age of eleven when he stole from the wrong target, a dark wizard. On the verge of death, he contracted with a system that can teach him magical skills related to the Thief class. The system's first requirement is he accept the invitation to Hogwarts, a school for gifted young witches and wizards. (This is slow burn fanfic focusing an alternate storyline with its own plot. MC will not be overpowered right from the beginning, but he would use his skills creatively in order to deal with difficult situations.) WHAT TO EXPECT: -An mc that trains hard and follows the grind. -A unique power system. -Fights, lots of fights. -Mysterious Bloodline ******************************** (P)(A)(T)(R)(E)(O)(N) LINK: Patreon.com/Snollygoster ********************************* DISCORD https://discord.gg/TR3KKAhu9r

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Chapter 1Chapter 1: Caught in Act

A.N.: My new novel after the previous successful one. Don't worry I'll still write that one as well. Anyways be the first ones to write reviews and comments and get 100s of likes.

******

A skinny boy was walking along the busy streets while keeping his head low.

The boy look to be around 10 year old and his clothes were a bit shabby. His raven locks hid his bright amber eyes and most of his face.

Thump*

"Hey! watch it, squirt."

"Sorry..." replied Axel to yet another random passerby, making sure to keep his head low.

He wasn't behaving so timidly out of fear or nervousness. No, he was just trying to make sure that the random passerby he had just bumped into had nothing to remember him by.

A smirk rose from the corner of his mouth as he pocketed the loaded wallet of yet another rich target.

Yes, he was currently picking pockets in the cold streets of London.

He wasn't ashamed of it. In fact, he took pride in his skills. After all, he has acquired them after much pain and suffering.

Though his only targets are rich people who particularly seem to have this sense of superiority that he wants to smash. It might be unreasonable to some people but he had personal reasons for his hate.

He doesn't steal from people who are poor or good natured. He might be a pickpocketer right now, but he still had his own pride and principles.

These are the only things he can't give up on.

Axel has been an orphan for as long as he can remember. Though he didn't use to be as homeless as he is right now.

He used to live in an orphanage. It's not like he didn't have to struggle there, but at least he used to have a roof over his head and some food to fill his stomach.

But somehow, these almost magical accidents kept happening around him and he was soon kicked out, left to fend for himself. He even had to drop out of the school.

Maybe he could have stayed if he endured the beatings of the older kids quietly without losing control, or maybe the Orphanage keeper could have still kept him if he begged for it or complained to the local authority. But, Axel decided that he had had enough of that place.

That was about three years ago, when he was eight years old.

"Heh, this was a nice haul," he muttered, checking the contents of his wallet. By now, he has amassed enough to last him for quite a while. But Axel wasn't satisfied with just having enough money for food. He knows that he can't keep living like this forever. Pickpocketing and petty thefts are not sustainable and the money is too low for his ambitions.

Thus, he's been amassing just enough to start a business of his own. You need money to make money. And once he has enough capital, he has the confidence and smarts to make it work despite his young age, if he's cautious enough.

'So... who's next?' he thought to himself as his eyes darted in all directions. Pickpocketing is a difficult job. He can't just start robbing random people and lot of time and patience are needed for all the other conditions to meet. Though his one redundant quality is that, he only robs rich @ssholes.

"Ah, is it my lucky day today?" He asked himself as he found a man who seemed to be begging to be robbed just after a few minutes of strolling.

Walking briskly with a small fancy stick in his hand, a tall man with grey eyes, dressed luxuriously in an odd old-fashioned cloak that covered his whole body was walking across with a disgusted expression on his face as he looked around the whole world distastefully. His 'thou art beneath me' look instantly signed him up on top of Axel's steal list.

Even as Axel began to make his way toward the man, he had to wonder just why the man seem so disdainful of everything. He decided thad he will not be bumping into this guy. The guy seems to be the sort who'd want to beat him up just for having any physical contact with a street urchin. So, he has to apply one of his more subtle approaches.

'It's going to be a bit difficult, but it's not like I can't run away,' thought Alex a bit smugly. Though he definitely possessed the talent and skills to back up his claims. He has the confidence to outrun any man in this area. He has managed to slip out of the worst of situations.

Though... all these claims applied only to muggles and he had no way of knowing this at the time.

The clueless Axel studied the man carefully and pinpointed the location of the man's possessions. He then purposefully began walking in the way of the incoming man and timing their intersection at the moment when the alley was the closest to ensure his escape route in case of being caught.

When he reached right in front of the man, the guy inevitably had to look at the annoying bug in front of him. Just as the amber eyes met grey, Axel's eyes shifted to glance behind the man and his expression changed dramatically.

The man, who thought himself to be a sharp one, quickly glanced behind, only to find... nothing! Everything seemed to be normal.

'Score!' Axel smirked. 50% work was already done. Lightning quick, his hand snaked into the man's unusual cloak to find his wallet. Though oddly enough, instead of a wallet, he found a pouch. Given that he had less than a second to do his thing, he didn't think too much and quickly stuffed the pouch into the bulky jacket he was wearing. Or at least, he tried to

.

Everything had gone very well and he had even managed to not make any noise even while stealing such a bulky pouch which must have been filled with coins.

But, as he moved past the man while pocketing the pouch, he felt the pouch in his hand growing extremely hot all of sudden making him curse inwardly! And... if that wasn't enough, it somehow emitted an extremely loud noise as if to alarm the owner about a thief!

'Fuck!' Cursing at the absurdity of the situation, Alex didn't waste his time. He chucked the purse to the other side of the street to distract the man and made a beeline for the alley while his brain worked furiously.

'He should glance towards his flying purse, and then he would either run after me, or the pouch, or pull out a knife, or even a gun. I should at least have 2 seconds to run in all cases,'

And that was enough to run into the alley. Once he turned, the man would have to chase to get a clear shot and by then, he would be out of his sight. Thus, Axel should be out fine for now but suddenly, he felt something was wrong.

He threw a quick glance behind him — Only to see the man pointing the stick which he had in his hand at Axel and a beam of purple light already half on its way to hit him.

Eyes widening, he quickly tried to dodge but it was already too late. He was quick, but he was not THAT quick yet.

The light hit him on his side and his whole body instantly went stiff, completely immobile. For some reason, the man hasn't thrown a second glance towards the pouch, and neither did he have to pull out his weapon from his robe. It was always in his hand! That fancy stick. Thus, the man was able to catch Axel off guard since Axel never knew there was a world of magic he had no knowledge about.

Axel's petrified body hit the ground hard, but the man was far from being satisfied. He was looking at Axel like he was an ant that had just bitten the man.

"You filthy mudblood animal...You dared to try and steal from a pureblood wizard in the middle of the day," he drawled, his voice containing cold fury as the pouch that he'd thrown across the street somehow flew back into the man's waiting hand with a flick of his fancy stick.

Axel was completely out of the loop with what was happening right now. First the alarm, and the hot bag, then that beam of light which came out of that stick which made him completely immobile, and now that mudblood and pureblood wizard thingy.

He didn't know what was happening, but from one look at the man's ruthless face, he knew that if he didn't escape right now, he was in some serious danger. He knows that look well. If he's caught, he'd be lucky to escape with a few broken bones.

'C'mon! Move! Move!' He tried, he really did. But try as he might, he couldn't make his body move at all!

The next thing he knew, he was somehow lifted off the ground and carried into the alleyway a the man's wandpoint.

The man waved his wand a few more times and muttered something and the world around him turned silent. He couldn't hear the noise coming from the busy street of London nor anything else, just the man's footsteps as he came to stand in front of his petrified body.

He heard the man chuckle darkly at his vain struggles. "You filthy little thing. I was angry at first, but now... I think it was for my own good that you delivered yourself to me. After all, it's been a while since I tortured someone to my heart's content," he said and Axel felt the man's voice tone changing.

Beforehand, his voice was cold and almost emotionless. But now, it seemed as if a barrier had been lifted off, and now his voice was sounding much scarier. He understood that voice. It's the voice of someone who enjoys inflicting pain.

The man squatted down in front of him, making his face visible. His face was set in a disdainful annoyed look before. But now, his mouth was curved into a cruel sadistic expression grin and his eyes contained a hint of madness in them. Looking at this guy, Axel renewed his struggle to break free while his mind tried to find some way out of this absurd situation.

'If it's a dream, now would be a great time to wake up,' he thought as he saw the man pointing the stick at him again.

"CRUCIO!"

"ARRRRRRG!!!! Arrrrrrrrrrgghhh!!!!!"

Creak* *Creak* *Creek* *SNAP*

In his small life, Axel had suffered much physical pain through various means and his pain tolerance had gotten quite high. Not to brag, but he didn't think there were many things that would now make him flinch.

But this thing, whatever it was not only made him flinch, it made him squirm in utter agony for what felt like forever! He'd never felt pain this intense in all parts of his body at the same time and for such a prolonged duration! He just wanted it to end.

And, due to the damn paralysis, he couldn't even scream, nor could he move to stop the man which caused an odd creaking sound from his body when he tried to move it. One of his shoulders seems to be dislocated in his extreme attempt at moving.

The man, upon seeing Alex glaring at him, raised his eyebrows in surprise. He seemed almost... impressed.

"I have to admit, you've got some fight in you, little rat. I never expected that a little mudblood could stay sane after taking that," he muttered, almost to himself. He had thought that he'll kill the rat after one crucio since a child wasn't expected to retain a functioning brain after one, but it seems that he can have a bit more fun with this one.

"CRUCIO!"

Axel, who was still recoiling from the first spell made to dodge it but then, he remembered that he still couldn't move at all!

Helpless, he could only grit his teeth and suffer as his bones creaked from the strain. But this time, he tried to distract himself from the pain by thinking of a way out of this situation. Though all he could think of was how it could be this painful and how he would even surrender all his money if this man would just stop this.

Though after the third Cruciatus, all Axel had in his mind was—

'I'll kill you... I'll kill you... I'll kill you!'

Now, even if the man kindly stopped, took him to the hospital, and gave him a lot of money, Axel still wouldn't let this guy off!

By now, the man could no longer take pleasure in the boy's suffering. He had to admit, he was more than a bit creeped out from the look in his hate-filled amber eyes which seemed to bore a hole through his skull.

Even trained Aurors would be much worse off than this little guy who was glaring at him like a chained beast waiting to pounce. He even felt a bit intimidated by it.

'No! I will not be intimidated by a mere child!' The man refused to admit it and thus, decided to make this boy beg like he should.

"You'll be begging for death after this."

""""CRUCIO!!!"""" he didn't hold back this time. He wasn't the most powerful in the world, but this much is easily enough to incapacitate an adult wizard, most probably for life. It's called an unforgivable for a reason.

"MMPHHFFF *CRACK* AAAAAAAAAAHHH!!"

This time, Axel got hit so bad that he had to dislocate his jaw just so that he could scream out his pain. Blood came from his eyes and nose and if he hadn't relieved himself just half an hour ago, then even his bladder would have come loose.

But... somehow, the fight in his amber-colored eyes had still not waned. It had intensified!

Axel was a petty freak with a vicious streak more than a mile wide. Back in the orphanage, he would never give in to bullying and would go to unimaginable lengths just to get his petty revenge.

The reason he didn't give up, despite wanting to die right now was...

He didn't want to give this man the satisfaction of getting what he wanted. Yes sir, this man... has to die.

He was feeling a variety of emotions right now which contained a healthy amount of fear, panic, and confusion at how this man was able to do this unknown damnable torture.

But the most prevalent emotion in his head right now was—Rage. Yes, he was royally pissed right now, and for a good reason.

Painful memories of the past flashed past his eyes. Back then, he was weak and helpless against the strong opponents who beat him mercilessly. But he was still not willing to take it lying down. Even he didn't know why, but he absolutely couldn't just bow his head and accept it like any other weak orphan in his place should.

So, he worked hard. He tried to become strong, strong enough so that he does not lose control. Strong enough that he would be the one giving out the beatings.

Right now, even if he wasn't strong enough to be invincible, but he was confident enough to at least escape if the enemy is stronger.

But! Here he is, getting his ass handed to him once again. Only, this time, it was much much much worse.

So, wasn't he back to square one? This man was able to deal with Axel with just one beam of light and now he was playing with him.

Then... wasn't he still too weak? And, it doesn't seem that his life is going to be spared when this guy is done with him.

'Do I need to depend on that again?' He thought in exasperation as his dead eyes suddenly focused back sharply on the man.

A spark lit up in the depths of his bloodshot amber eyes and soon, it seemed like his eyes were glowing.

'This guy... has to die!'

xxxxx

Second chapter coming very soon. Add this to your library.

If you want to read up to 10+ Chapters in advance, check my Patre on

Patreon.com/Snollygoster

P.S.: Wherever the Word "Chris" or "Alex" has been used, It's "Axel"! A-X-E-L. I have a habit of writing "Chris" because of my other fanfic's 170+ chapters and "Alex" is just typo. These mistakes are only in the beginning chapters since I get used to Axel later.

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FictionOnlyReader · Book&Literature
4.6
442 Chs
Table of Contents
Volume 0 :Auxiliary Volume
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ratings

  • Overall Rate
  • Writing Quality
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  • Story Development
  • Character Design
  • world background
Reviews
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Primordial
PrimordialLv14
Spelloyal
SpelloyalLv12

Honest Review time. If you want, you can skip the detailed criteria and just read the general evaluation and conclusion. I usually go easy on fanfic and give it 4 or 5 stars unless there's some major or annoying problem that I can't let go, but that's not the case with this fic. I'm giving it a 2,4 because I'm evaluating it mainly on the criteria I use for an original novel and not for a fic. As an original novel, I would give it 3.5 but this fic lost stars for failing in some points as a fanfic. The reason for this is that in addition to being a top-ranked fic, the author actually earns more than a thousand dollars from it on Patreon, charging much more per advanced chapter than an original novel charges per chapter. General Rating:It's an interesting story that's worth reading, but nothing very special., but it's heavily AU to the point where a simple change of name of some locations, spells and characters would make this a generic original novel that begins in an academy and system setting. I don't highly recommend it for those who hope to read a good fic about Harry Potter because they love the original work. I recommend readers start this fic thinking of it as an original novel rather than a fanfic. As an original novel this is an average story, but when placed among fanfics this becomes a top work in the webnovel where chapter releases need to be frequent and this is a great challenge for amateur authors who write for pleasure or as a hobby. Webnovel criteria: 1- Writing Quality - 3 stars: The writing quality is good, at the level of a good author, but there are some problems that anyone who read the entire fic at once notices and that's why I'm giving 3 stars in this category. It is worth mentioning that the author does not even correct errors such as a wrong name even when readers point it out. Examples are like when the MC was undercover and introduced himself to a character using a fake name, but that character called him by his real name, a skill that suddenly changed its name, another skill that should have been the next one to be unlocked in the class progression but it seems like it was simply forgotten as the MC didn't even mention the reason for never picking it up, and finally but most importantly the system became more and more irrelevant as the fic progressed. The system is still there, but it never gets screen time other than giving missions and rewards, and although it still helps the MC progress in some ways, this progression is rarely shown, the system status screen simply no longer appears in the fic. 2- Stability of Updates - 2 stars: It's not very stable, the fic has already gone through long hiatus, the chapters are currently released every two or three days and although it's very good for a fanfic, it's not the case for what it is almost an original novel where the author profits from it. 3- Story Development - 3 stars: It's average, the MC being a thief in a world where everyone is a wizard was interesting, but then ninjas and warriors were added and suddenly the MC is no longer special, just better than the rest, that added some more interesting fights but it took away what was special about MC as the author didn't do a good job of differentiating the Arcane Thief class from a Thief in a generic fantasy setting. As it is a completely AU scenario, there is no way to evaluate how well the author portrayed the events in relation to the original work since nothing more than names, some basic mechanics and some locations follow the original HP so I am once again evaluating it as an original novel and disregarding it. how well the author used the source material to write his fic. 4- Character Design - 1 star: To be honest, in an original novel I would give something like 3 stars since all the heroines are interesting and well written, but the rest of the characters are not developed and totally forgettable. I'm giving this one star because not even striking and easy-to-use characters like Snape, McGonagall and Dumbledore were relegated to characters with no presence who barely appear, so in addition to taking off 2 stars because only the MC and Heroines have presence, I'm taking more two for failing as a fanfic to use even something basic from the original material. 5- World Background - 3 stars: It is a generic fantasy setting where we have the world of darkness, the world of light and the weaker human world in between. In the human world we have Atlantis, an advanced and reclusive magical civilization that lost much of its past heritage due to disaster. Nothing bad, but nothing original here. Conclusion: This is less of a fic and more of a generic original novel that is interesting and worth reading, but would never top the rankings when competing with other original novels. When compared to other fics instead of original novels, this one ends up standing out.

Truck_Samaa
Truck_SamaaLv14
Flint679
Flint679Lv4

Although it's impossible to to create something perfect, I believe this is the closest we'll get to a perfect fanfic. The story is incredible and the character doesn't feel like he was just added into the story but genuinely feels like a part of the world. Your attention to detail regarding the world that already existed but injecting enough originality to make it feel like an actual harry potter spin-off instead of just another wish-fulfillment story. The character design and progression is refreshing and the way you imbue the story and character relationships with just the right amount of emotion that it never comes across as overbearing or lacking in depth. The main character is relatable to so many with his struggles and outlook on life due to hardship but also his emotional development when interacting people he cares about and who care about him is *chef's kiss* amazing. I struggle with consistency of character when writing but after 49 chapters and 3000+ word count each, you still stayed true to his beliefs while giving him an open mind to slowly accept new ideals is incredible. This is the first fanfic I've reviewed and I will add this to my top 5, which of whom, only one place is taken. CORNBRINGER's Game of Thrones: The Prideful One at number one. If your writing never falters, it might threaten that position My closing remarks are: It feels illegal that I did not pay to read this because of how good it is. 10/10 You have created a masterpiece and I wish you continued success in the future. Good luck and Godspeed

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