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Trapped in Time

Auteur: RenuKakkar
Romance
Actuel · 492.9K Affichage
  • 149 Shc
    Contenu
  • 4.8
    28 audimat
  • NO.200+
    SOUTIEN
Synopsis

What would happen if you got stuck in Time? Zia has completed her Ph.D. in Botany and has applied for the post of lecturer/ Professor. She joins a High school as a temporary teacher and is entrusted with the task of leading a group of ten students on a trekking /camping expedition. On the way they meet a guy who seems to be a trouble maker but later, he proves to be a pillar of strength. Early morning their camp is attacked by Bears and they flee taking a different route. But they are lost. They enter a lost world where people are living, in hiding, for over 250 years. Their technology is much advanced as compared to ours. Their world is called ‘Utopia’ but now it is changing due to an oppressive ruler, meaning the ills of our world have manifested in Utopia too. They are trapped in the time of this hidden world and want to help the people there fight against the oppressive ruler and his cronies. The oppressive ruler wants to make a number of Time Machines by using the brains of the scientists who died in harness at the site of the experiments. They all decide to help the good citizens of ‘Utopia’ the lost world. The huge brains are destroyed and the Orbs of the scientists escape from the huge pulsating Brain to help them in their mission of destroying the Huge brains at other centers. In this process, the crystals that are used in the hypnotizing guns are almost finished and to get more they split up to go to the 'Magical World' through a curtain which is actually a portal. The Magical World is a flat man made Earth-like satellite, which was made as a joke to taunt the scientists 7000 years ago, and which is still operational. Here they meet the inhabitants. They are fascinated with the advancement of science especially the talking chips and the flying cars. They see a completely different world where animals, plants, rocks, water etc. can talk. Before you touch anything you need to seek permission. They also meet the Aliens called the 'Crocodile Race' who have come to the Magical World (the flat satellite) to get supplies. They see a spaceship being guided to land by the scientists of the Magical World. They also see the inside of the mountain where the controls are situated which help in maintaining the environment of the Magical World. They get an invite from the Aliens to visit ‘Titan’ the satellite of Saturn where the Crocodile race has settled. At present they are on the mother Ship going to Titan. **************************** Will try to post a chapter in a week now.

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Table des matières
Volume 1 :Journey to Utopia and Meeting the Aliens
Volume 2 :Visiting Titan and the Return Journey

audimat

  • Tarif global
  • Qualité de l’écriture
  • Mise à jour de la stabilité
  • Développement de l’histoire
  • Conception des personnages
  • Contexte mondial
Critiques
Aimé
Nouveau
Ken_Raynous
Ken_RaynousLv4

The author's prose is quite simple but attractive, the sentences flowing smoothly. There are only a couple of minor errors that will not alienate readers from their reading flow. The author also does a good job when mixing paragraphs of the characters with informative segments. As for the rate of updates, it looks pretty constant so far. The story progresses slowly but surely at the moment. Just past half of the chapters published so far (and especially two thirds into it) the main conflict begins to unravel, as the story focused initially on introducing multiple characters throughout each chapter. Perhaps the author could have allowed herself to leave certain segments of his characters for later, or perhaps she could have intermixed them more with the plot itself so that it would have progressed more effectively. As for the characters, I have to give credit to the author. Considering that she had to focus on so many at the same time, they are all quite well-fleshed-out, written and portrayed convincingly so that readers can connect to them properly. The fictional universe, perhaps, is the greatest strength in this story. The plot remains within realistic margins for much of its stretch (I read that the author had to change from "realistic" to "science" fiction, and I certainly understand the reason). A lot of what I've read so far is focused on a group of students camping, and the author certainly knows how to make you feel part of that experience, from minor details to the exploration of nature itself. In general terms, this is a rather compelling slow-paced and character-driven story for nature lovers and readers looking for more grounded, adventure-themed sci-fi stories.

Sigheti
SighetiLv4

This work is both relaxing and entertaining to read. With only five chapters out I wasn’t able to get a complete picture, but what I was able to read was promising. If I may give you some pointers? My apologies if you find them uncalled for, my intentions are good. Sometimes the writing needs some slight polishing. One of them: “Yes of course ma’am,” the personal secretary replied. “He has been waiting for you,” she added. I believe there is a pass in time before she adds ‘He has been waiting for you’? If not it can be perfectly written as; “Yes, of course ma’am,” the personal secretary replied, “he has been waiting for you.” But I assume there is a time pass (she walks trough the room for instance) my advice in these situations is to write - for example - this down; “Yes of course ma’am,” the personal secretary replied. She went back to typing before adding, “He has been waiting for you.” Another tip I hope to give you is to add less ‘she said’ or ‘he added’ in your dialogue. It’s unnecessary and tiring to your reader. Other small things like; retelling something (meaning you describe something happening and then write down it happening are also not always necessary) Example: After voicing all instructions like a bullet train, the principal told her that she‘s dismissed. “You may go now,” said the principal. These of course are all simply some small style changes that don’t deserve to called ‘real errors’. I hope you have a lot of fun continuing your work, keep going!

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