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hero4hire
hero4hireLv111yr
2023-05-20 07:33

Author it seems like you're trying to follow the framwork you set in the beginning and its stopping your novel into becoming something better. Constantly trying to force the cannon with such a big plot twist from the beginning doesnt make any sense when it could be so much better if you let the story progress organically. You have amazing take on magic and the unqiue power mc have, why not focus more on it with occational mix of cannon where he can just help if convinient or ignore it since dumby gonna control the narrative anyway. I'd recommend: Ancient rune professor, mythical journey if you wanna check out other novels that did following the cannon without letting it dictate the flow of story genre.

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maskhara
maskharaLv13

im leaving a mixed review here hoping the author reads it. so far the story seems well paced and well written in terms of language and structure. im pointing out the things marring my reading experiance hoping it helps dont let it detract from your enjoyment of what seems to be a well written tale. however reading up to chapter 15 the story has a distinct feeling of condecension, towards the established lore, world building and plot. instead of just changing what the author wants they keep criticizing the established world building and stating that their version is the one that makes sense over the original. that may not be the intent but it certainly seems to be the effect. another thing that i mind is that the protagonist seems to be one of those transmigrators who looks down upon all the plot and conflicts as a high and mighty voice of reason that cant be bothered with childish politics and looks at all the mysteries and norms of the world as senseless and beneath them. and the character seems to hold most other characters in disdain and acts haughtyt and rude but is facing absolutely no consequences for it. it seems that the author intends for them to be this way. this however conflicts directly with how the author describes the character. on the whole the character seems unconcerned with the world and events and just wants to be a research hobo who is power hungry... to sum ot up this story has forspoken syndrome.... where the protagonists personality ruins your immersion and enjoyment of an otherwise likeable and well made world

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18 Chs