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CruddyDrummer
CruddyDrummerLv41yr
2023-04-05 23:00

The author clearly has a vision of the scenes and scenarios in their head but fails to express them properly resulting in an incoherent mess. Scenes like after the mc fell down, or with the students rioting in Nadias pov, the merchant etc make no sense. In fact I have 0 clue about anything during the whole climbing pipes and windows scene. Nadia's pov during the riot and what happened almost feels like a 2 page scene cramped into one small paragraph in a very incoherent way.

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