CruddyDrummer

The read the original and lemme tell you. The MC is really annoying. He's the most loud talkative guy who never shuts up. He's always talking brain rot. Also he's completely detached from reality, Imagine Deadpool's 4th wall breaking but he's always doing it, that is this MC. It completely takes u out of the sorry.

It's interesting but this V is just a huge downgrade from the ingame V. 1. He's a net runner, every story for some reason has MC as netrunner. It's boring, he's a net runner that spends 90% of the time fighting. Kinda contradictory. 2. He's an ass net runner too, his only advantage is that he's an AI and hence he has one special hack that he can hardly use. 3. I am 30 chapters down, MC is playing with the big dogs now but probably can barely fight some mid level thugs. It's a very toned down V, a very weak V and I feel like there has been no change in his power scaling. He has money but no power. A big mouth though.

The writing isn't better than bl3, maybe slightly. I have been going through the chapters multiple times, it's a very very difficult book to follow with a very clear lack of structure. With writing there needs to be a certain flow but here the conversations and actions appear very disjointed. There is no drama or tension and release, only description which is sadly also bland. The tone is also all over the place, and especially the characters feel very shallow. I couldn't remember any interesting details about them with a gun to my head. If I had to give an example about tone, it goes from cliche conversations to murder hobo in like mili seconds. There is that lack of tension. I think the author is trying to replicate the wacky energy of borderland, but sadly it's not that easy to do in written format. I would advise to read some shakespeare comedies with similar silly wacky energy (and they are the most confusing books to follow). Overall I hope you don't take this personally, it's just something I noticed and decided to voice to help your writing journey. Pacing, Tone, Structure, Characters, Tension, Atmosphere. Things you can work from the top of my head.

Quantum processors build by watching Linus tech tips, changing thermal paste, and raid and gen4 ssds 😂😂 bruh. Include some more techbro things. You're outing yourself author. Maybe the quantum computer can be rooted too?

The writing quality is very average, maybe below it depending on your standards. The conversations between people especially feel inorganic. The characters are very - mtl quantity over quantity writing style.

The authors' choice of transmigration and immaturity doesn't go along well together. A grown man acting all childish doesn't go along that's all.Also the development, till 16 chapters not even a day has passed. Thousands of words and yet only some progress. Loads of fillers in it, that doesn't contribute anything to the plot.I hope the author edits and paces their work properly in the future.

1

At death's door and still bushing. 😂.......,...................Nice one author

yea

It's written and structured very badly. Things happening is very chaotic but not in a good way