webnovel
HideousGrain
HideousGrainAuthor3yr
2021-03-23 03:19

This is my second review and I´ve currently released about 100 chapters before I even realized it. Time passed so fast, I want to clarify a few things that might have annoyed some readers or caused them to cringe :3 The following list might also help new readers to decide whether to read the story or not. 1. My native language is not English and unfortunately, my grammar and vocabulary are not perfect [Sorry for that] It might happen that the chapters from 1-60~ have some minor plot-holes/slightly weird character development and the reason for this is quite simple. I started to write this novel without any prior writing experience and in a foreign language at that. If you can´t bear to read a few grammar mistakes and minor overall mistakes it will be quite difficult for you to binge read or follow me on my journey. 2. There were some readers that couldn´t help but lament about the MC´s cringe-worthy behavior because he is emotional… Jason is a youth, barely 14 years old, and had to endure a tuff past… character development shouldn´t be over in a single chapter, right? Furthermore, due to his young age, he might act childish sometimes, even though he is used to behave like he already matured. 3. I’m sure that the MC will not have a Harem, but most likely a future romance sub-plot. 4. My Novel´s name is [God´s Eyes] but in the end, there are also other aspects, helping him to grow stronger. 5. The world our MC lives in is labeled “High-Fantasy” for a reason, please don’t try to use normal physical laws, even though I´m trying to make it a little bit realistic. 6. The story is unique, yet slow-paced and I did my best to improve my writing quality/style and every critique previously stated, but in the end, I´m just doing it as a hobby, because it´s exciting and interesting. I gave myself 4 stars because I see that I can improve myself further and I hope everyone will give it a try :3 Thanks for reading the review <3

Liked by 392 people

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Replies88
I_Love_Hina
I_Love_HinaLv13

https://***.grammarly.com/ Try this out cause helps against grammar. Totally free.

Matt_pike
Matt_pikeLv5

When should we expect our female lead

It_s_JODnotGOD
It_s_JODnotGODLv1

No harem ? I don't know why I shouldn't give you a mere power stone young mortal

_ReAdEr_
_ReAdEr_Lv3

no harem? such rarity at least we can expect a no dumb, dickhead MC and no wood boards following the MC. such rarity.

TheRealWafflez
TheRealWafflezLv14

Why don’t you try it? Because it helps with grammar....😂

I_Love_Hina:https://***.grammarly.com/ Try this out cause helps against grammar. Totally free.
Paradoxicalguy
ParadoxicalguyLv15

it's a little slow and the rankings are confusing

Medoshi_Senpai
Medoshi_SenpaiLv4

does it have any romance?

HideousGrain
HideousGrainAuthor

The Glossary will update 'soon', but tbh I thought that the rankings were quite simple....maybe I have to create a discord server in order to explain everything easier ...

Paradoxicalguy:it's a little slow and the rankings are confusing
HideousGrain
HideousGrainAuthor

Yes, but not yet

Medoshi_Senpai:does it have any romance?
NaiNao
NaiNaoLv1

Is the mc gay, straight, bi, pans or does he not know or maybe hes undecided or does he prefers not to be labeled

HideousGrain:The Glossary will update 'soon', but tbh I thought that the rankings were quite simple....maybe I have to create a discord server in order to explain everything easier ...
kolc
kolcLv1

probably straight

NaiNao:Is the mc gay, straight, bi, pans or does he not know or maybe hes undecided or does he prefers not to be labeled
Equinox_D
Equinox_DLv14

Harem??

Monarchofchaos
MonarchofchaosLv2

Is this a harem and if not will he have more the one wife or one fml

HideousGrain:Yes, but not yet
Opal_professor
Opal_professorLv1

ululu

mybsxn
mybsxnLv10

Big fan here, will there be any possible time skips in this novel?

Noire_Nova
Noire_NovaLv12

Hm. I feel the need to mention that all functioning universes that can sustain lifeforms require a standard set of universal laws. Order. A system by which the worlds are governed. This goes especially for stories, which tend to be far more linear in progression than reality. High-fantasy worlds are no exception. Even fanatasy worlds have governing universal bodies, laws such as the laws of mana (elementalism, mana transference, mana technologies, etc.) often acting in conjuction with our reality’s physics. Sometimes, fantasy worlds would even have their own laws and attributes. I feel that the later chapters of the novel ‘Soul of Negary’ sums the idea up quite well. In my opinion, the different environments of fantasy worlds are hardly an excuse for inconsistent writing. Of course, I haven’t read this work, nor do I intend to after reading about the possibility of romance, so this comment isn’t directed towards the author (at least not intentionally).

Cael09
Cael09Lv13

@HideousGrain - wholesome self-reflection. I wish you the very best in your journey of growth while entertaining a bunch of freeloaders like us :p I should be honest and tell you that I considered reading your novel based on this review you gave yourself and I get you on some parts of it as I did some while back. Thank you for sharing your world with us mate and I hope to see you advance and create more for a long while :)

O5_1
O5_1Lv3

Did you even read the Comment that you replied to?

Monarchofchaos:Is this a harem and if not will he have more the one wife or one fml
Monarchofchaos
MonarchofchaosLv2

The comment I replied to was him answering the question is there romance. I was asking if it’s a haram and whether or not he’ll have 1 or more wife’s

O5_1:Did you even read the Comment that you replied to?
Dovahdu4229
Dovahdu4229Lv14

Comic version??

Other Reviews
MadHatter0_o
MadHatter0_oLv3

This is less of a review, more of a first impression as I have read 20+ chapters while writing it. So my opinion might be incomplete. I apologize if something like that happens and would like others to correct me. I would like to start by thanking the author for his hard work and for such an amazing story. It has been quite a long time since I have read a web/light novel with a grounded and realistic MC as well as a well-built world setting. The story started with brief background information on how it all started and necessary information about different levels. It was a nice touch and magnificently done. I liked the temperament of MC. He is intelligent yet has the thought process of 13 years old. He is responsible but doesn't give the feeling of an old man in a young boy's body. His reaction to gaining his sight back, his way to deal with money, or his reaction to his current situation is all realistic, at least as realistic as it can be in a fantasy world. He is not like a typical LN/WN MC who thinks "I am gonna murder this guy's three-generation because he disrespected me by making fun of me" not is he a pushover. He handled his situation like a mature person with a hint of teenage flair (talking about that Middle-finger scene). Overall he is a pretty likable character. The magic system seems pretty simple and easy to follow. I don't have to check again and again which level is after what. The world setting is good so far, not too confusing. The pacing of the story is good so far. It is not going too slow or too fast. But I think there is some space to improve regarding these topics. So far I have talked about the good things of the story. Now let's talk about the things that can be improved. First thing, Proofreading. The story is mostly well written. But there are quite a few mistakes in grammar and sentence making that could have been avoided with a more round of checking. The number and frequency are not that high but still, it hinders the immersion. Next, supporting character development. If first 22 chapter is any indication, I think the author should spend a bit more time developing supporting/minor characters. We have only 1 noticeable supporting character till chapter 23 and it's Greg. He is hinted to be a main supporting cast and good friend of MC. But do we know anything about him other than he is rich and talented? We don't know anything about Greg as a person or feel connected to him. If it is solved in the latter part of the story then it's ok. However, I think it should have been much sooner. The world-building and background description are also much to be desired. For example, it helps the readers to visualize if you give a brief description of the Room MC is living in or the market and its shops when he went out shopping. Maybe a bit more description about people and environment when he went out for the first time after his sight was back. this would have helped us feel connected to the MC more. This part is some selfish request as a reader. Please keep the MC realistic and relatable like this. Don't make him like a thousand other MC whose improvement doesn't follow any logic or common sense. I am still miffed about that 120 points in the practical exam. MC has been blind and malnourished throughout his all life. Moreover, He doesn't exercise or haven't practiced the practical part at all. Suddenly 5 days after getting his sight back, He is using martial arts routine accurately and smoothly. And in these 5 days, he had to gather mana for the exam, learn how to read and write, prepare for the theoretical part of the exam and go out sightseeing. It is almost physically impossible for him to do this properly, no matter how easy the routine was. The craziest part is he got more points than Greg who is practicing longer than MC, has better development, and seems like a genius in martial arts. Please don't do things like this. Don't throw logic out of the window to bring sudden growth to MC or sudden character development. Please introduce a romantic interest but not a harem please. we have more than enough harem plot on this site. what we are lacking is a meaningful, non-harem romance. Please fill that void.

Anirudh7
Anirudh7Lv4

From the start to the recent chapters the story has flowed quite well with no jarring plots, its been written brilliantly, the world building has been done well as well but has to have a qualitative upgrade once more worlds are introduced, the human cultivation system while it might draw in readers because of the new beast system but is actually quite limiting, with barely the good soul world bearers having a chance at a high level and the rest having to accept mediocrity, body refining cultivation has now been introduced which is a good start already and with the mc being of a stronger race im guessing he'll also cultivate with that races system and bloodline which again would be a stronger system, when his bloodline awakens i hope the bloodline itself grants him a way to cultivate the way the celestia race does atleast For a book which the author says will only have about 1000 chapters we're alraedy almost 30% through with only about a year gone and no actual personality change in the mc, but just teenage growth, if the mc doesnt change much this story will somehow end up with an mc with a teenagers personality, no special personalities like being a sadist, womanizer, cold, evil,lazy, chilled out,and the chaotic good ones etc What we have is a person who nice and at best hot blooded for battle which is too basic for an mc hes basically got aside characters personality THe side charactets dont pose much attachment and are disposable in the sense the mc will leave them behind, hopefully that changes when he reaches a stronger race and makes friends Completing this story in 700 chapters kinda feels jarring, i expect multiple time skips to achieve that which i dont want to see in quick succesion, hopefully the author decides to keep taking it at a slow pace and extend the novel to about 1500 chapters atleast THe time flow needs a revamp, with the soul powers issue dealt with, and body refining being a long term thing, we dont need a day to day story, time can flow faster, if i ignore everything and just look at how at almost 300 chapters we've only had almost 1 year passing i must say its one of the world time passage sequences written, with there being no reason to have the mc start growing to the top in just a few years, and with him potentially having a long life span, the time definitely has to flow faster In essence except these minor issues to be dealt with the story itself is quite nice and has good potential the only thing to avoid i guess is an over fixation on the human race and making it reach the top, too many books have done that, and frankly books that dont focus on races to take up and focus on the mc and his companions and stuff as people more have a better plot

Ethyn_Armstrong
Ethyn_ArmstrongLv15
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