chapter 13 ( sudden change)

Chapter 13

Li Qi went quickly to the street where his apartment is, called a restaurant, and ordered food for two, then gave the address of Mandolin's apartment. But ten minutes later, he called the restaurant again, telling them that he had left the apartment and was waiting on the corner to get his food, and then requested that they send the delivery person quickly and specify exactly where he would meet him. Li Qi paid for the food when he met the delivery man on the street and informed him that he was the one who had called, after which he asked the delivery person to lend him the uniform because he thinks that his girlfriend is cheating on him and he wants to catch her. He said that he would go now and check on her and return the clothes to him in a few minutes. Then Li Qi tempted the worker with a large amount of money, so the man agreed, took off his jacket, and gave him the thermal bag. Then Li Qi went to the building where Mandolin lives and gave the door guard the food receipt. The guard called Mandolin on the intercom. She replied and told him that she had not ordered anything. The guard informed Li Qi about this. But Li Qi insisted.

"Please make her ask her boyfriend first." "It might've been him who requested food."

The guard answered him after he ended the call with Mandolin.

"There is no man in this apartment; there is only a woman who lives alone."

Li Qi insisted,

"But the one who called us was a man, and he gave us this address." "Brother, please check again for me! The building is big. Maybe you got confused. If I go back to the restaurant and then he calls again and asks about his food, I'll be in trouble. Help me; I do not want to lose my job. "

The guard called out to two people who came out of an adjacent room and told them the number of Mandolin's apartment, then asked them:

"Is there a man in this apartment?" "Does the foreign woman have a boyfriend who lives with her?"

One man replied,

"No, she lives alone."

The guard commented,

"Do you believe me now?"

Li Qi noticed that one of the two men was the man he saw in Mandolin's apartment, so he kept looking at him, and the man spoke after the guard explained the situation to him. So the man said,

"Brother, make sure there is no man at this address." "I was there myself yesterday to investigate the water leakage problem, and there was no man there, neither a visitor nor a resident. We register visitors, and no one enters without registering, and this apartment has never registered a visitor. "I am sure that the address you have is wrong."

Li Qi thanked the guards and left. Then he went to the delivery person, gave him back the jacket and the thermal bag, took the food, and returned home happily. He sat down to eat with an appetite, and afterwards he slept with peace of mind.

In the morning, he got an email telling him that there was a job for him. Then the client sent him information about the target, a photo, and some money as a deposit for seriousness. They also inquired as to how much he wished to be paid to complete the job. and informed him that they were awaiting his response.

Li Qi went to see the target and followed him for a while. He was a man in his forties who seemed to be a visitor to the city because he lives in a hotel and frequents nightclubs and public places. After Li Qi knew everything he wanted about the man, he determined the appropriate place to carry out the mission.

Li Qi returned to his apartment and sat down to watch the camera recording as usual. When he was reviewing the camera footage of Mandolin's window, he paused the recording when she appeared in front of it and continued to look at Mandolin's image on the screen, then sent his reply to the client, telling him that he would be unable to carry out this job because he was busy now and returning the money to him, and then he refused the next message that was attempting to persuade him to execute it. After that, he went to sleep, saying "I will stop for a while and try something new".

He woke up in the morning without having any nightmares. He sat on his bed in astonishment that he had not seen any nightmares that night and had a good sleep. He was excited and decided to look for a nearby university to apply to, along with a field to study and benefit from. After doing research, he decided to choose administration as his field of study, and he then began preparing the required papers. He offered his own villa for sale, as he didn't intend to live in it anymore, and decided to invest its price in company shares in order to take profits as long as he would stop working and return to study.

Li Qi arrived for his therapy appointment cheerful and somewhat excited. He informed the therapist that he had enrolled in a business administration programme at the university, that he found the field interesting, and that he thought he would like his studies. Li Qi was amazed by the coincidence that now was the right time to apply to university. The therapist commented,

"Maybe that's fate." "Fate wanted to help you and give you another chance."

Li Qi smiled with apparent happiness and said,

"I'm really excited."

Then the therapist asked,

"You've never had a close friend before?" "Someone you trust, share your thoughts with, and can rely on."

Li Qi frowned and replied,

"I don't trust anyone, I don't depend on anyone, and I don't have a friend."

The therapist nodded and then asked,

"Can I know why you chose to go to a brothel instead of getting a girlfriend and living a normal life, especially when you were working at the nightclub?"

Li Qi answered,

"At first I tried; I don't deny it, but the first woman I met after leaving the orphanage was a nightclub goer, and she worked in prostitution, but I didn't know at first." "She was the one who approached me and took the initiative, and when we had sex together, it was my first time, but I just started suffocating her unconsciously, and she didn't like it, and she warned me more than once to stop practising this habit with her, but as you know, that is out of my control, but I didn't tell her that, so she broke up with me and told me that I needed a certain type of woman who could appreciate this act, but not her. Where else can you get to know a woman's sexual preferences from the beginning other than in brothels? where you pre-determine what you want, and they find for you someone who suits you and fulfils your requests. So I went to brothels and kept going that way. But after I started working with the moneylender and became a murderer, I thought that it would be better for me not to have a girlfriend, because something might happen to her because of my work, or she might find out what I do and hate me, then leave me, or worse, she might betray me and report about me. So I'd better go into brothels without an appointment, whenever I want, and without any engagements or risks. "

The therapist nodded and said,

"Imm, I think your reasoning is logical." "That was a really smart choice."

Li Qi smiled proudly. The therapist asked carefully,

"But now it's different, isn't it?" "There is no problem with that woman." "If she accepts you now, knowing your past but believing you have changed, don't you think you can quit visiting the brothel and live a normal life with her?"

Li Qi smirked and said,

"How can I live a normal life with her?" "While I'm still practising strangulation, nothing has changed."

The therapist commented,

"But you differ with her." "You returned to your senses and ceased strangulating when she requested you to; isn't this a clear difference between her and others?" "You can control yourself if you try."

Li Qi stood up sharply and said enragedly,

"Do you think I never tried to stop this habit?" " I even tried to tie myself to the bed headboard during the intercourse to stop myself from doing that. "Do you know what happened?" I became so enraged when attempting to free myself from the tie to the bed that I shattered the bedpost once while attempting to release my arms, terrifying the woman who was with me at the time. I didn't enjoy intimacy while I was tied up. I was furious and upset. So I guess the idea of stopping myself didn't work."

The therapist scratched his head and said,

"You don't know the source of this habit, do you?"

Li Qi nodded yes. So the therapist continued,

"But you must have seen something in your teens or childhood, like someone having sex and doing that, or a porn movie where they were doing it."

Li Qi exploded and approached the therapist's desk and said, with muffled anger,

"I don't watch porn, and I haven't done that ever, and I didn't see anyone, okay?"

Quietly, the therapist said,

"I don't mean anything offensive." I'm just trying to help you figure out the source of this action so that you can regain control over yourself. I just want to help you.

Li Qi apologised to the therapist, returned to his chair, sat down, bowed his head, held his forehead with his hands, and said,

"I don't know the source or the cause of this action." All I know is that's what I do when I get sexually excited and I can't control it."

Then Li Qi sighed in apparent suffering and helplessness.

"You told me before that you came here to follow the woman you're talking about and that you stopped going to brothels after you left your hometown, right? Or did you go to a brothel here?

Li Qi spontaneously replied,

"No, I didn't go to any brothels here."

The therapist asked:

"And you never thought of looking for one?"

Li Qi replied,

"No, I didn't think about it; I didn't feel like doing it." Why? "

The therapist commented,

"Because all of your thoughts and attention are solely on that woman, correct?"

Li Qi thought for a moment and was surprised that he hadn't noticed before the therapist's question, then answered,

"Yes, correct."

The therapist said,

"You will be surprised and reject what I'm going to say, but please think about it for a moment." "I believe that this woman can cure you of this habit, and that you will quit doing this to her in particular."

Li Qi looked at him suspiciously and said,

"Are you kidding me now?" "Does that make sense?" "In all my dreams and nightmares, I'm strangling her to death. What do you say?"

The therapist replied,

"But in reality you didn't do that, and you left after she warned you." "Even when she kicked you out of her apartment, you didn't argue or go back to her, but carried out her desire and respected her decision." "You put her in a high place and care about her to the point that you prefer her to yourself."

"But I am still dangerous; I can't be trusted, and if I do something and lose control, I will lose her forever." "No, I won't take any risks."

Li Qi replied while shaking in the chair and moving his hands to express his rejection of the idea.

The therapist smiled and said,

"That's exactly what makes her the best therapist for you." Your deep fear for her and your sense of responsibility will keep you in control.

You need to try to trust yourself a little more, and I'm not asking you to go now and jump with her to bed, and she probably won't either. All that I'm saying is that you must first trust yourself and give yourself a chance. Try to return to her life as a companion or as someone she knows in a strange country. She is new in the city like you, and she definitely has no friends. Try to become friends with her and accept her as a friend. And as the days pass, her trust in you will grow, as will your trust in yourself and in her, and I am confident that your condition will improve."

With a deep, calm tone, Li Qi asked,

"Where did you get this confidence in me?" "Why do you say that I am a trustworthy person?"

The therapist smiled, closed his eyes, opened them, and said,

"Mr. Li Chao, you may not see it, but you are a person who has principles and logic in his actions, and this is a great merit." "All is there—that you were adopting distorted thoughts, but now you are thinking and re-evaluating your thoughts and principles. As long as you came to me and asked for treatment, it means that you are a conscious and responsible person, and you do not try to place the responsibility on society or on this woman. Rather, you thought in a pragmatic and impartial manner. And despite your anger and rejection of her decision, you are aware that she has the right to choose and that her justifications are logical, and you respect her decision. This is all proof that you are a trustworthy person."

Li Qi couldn't stop the tears from falling from his eyes, but he quickly wiped them away and asked,

"What do you suggest I do?"

With clear satisfaction in the therapist's voice, he said,

"You attend the university for a while, then go to her and tell her that you started a new life, quit your old profession, and are learning new skills to become someone else, and see what her response will be." Even if she doesn't believe you, don't be sad. Just focus all your thoughts on yourself and your new life, and maybe after she sees that you have really changed, she will change her opinion of you. "

Li Qi paused to think, then said,

"I will do what you say." Let's see what happens."

He stood up and continued,

"I think our time is up."

The therapist smiled at him. This is the first time he has cared about the visitation rules and asked about the time. The therapist looked at his watch and said,

"almost."

Li Qi went to the door, and before leaving, he said,

"By the way, I had a work proposal a few days ago. The target is here in this city, but I refused the offer, and I took down the advertisement I had posted on the internet, announcing my presence here and my availability to receive work." "I will not do that anymore; I decided to have another career from the moment I was accepted into the university."

Then he got out the door without looking at the therapist or waiting for a response. After Li Qi left, the therapist looked left and right in astonishment, then stood up and sat down, as if he couldn't believe what he had just heard.