Reviews of Son of Jiraiya and Zabuza's Waifu Adventure
Son of Jiraiya and Zabuza's Waifu Adventure
JManM
- Overall Rate
- Writing Quality
- Updating Stability
- Story Development
- Character Design
- world background
First thing that has to be covered is that this is a fic adapting the Manga. As such, movies and anime only filler may be adapted at my discretion, and as such all the filler nonsense that breaks the balance of the setting such as Ranmaru and his eyes, or the Chakra Armor in Ninja Clash in the Land of Snow are not in this story. Despite this I place no weight with verbal descriptions of characters made in the manga that are not immediately supported by what we see. Kishi wrote Naruto on a very tight schedule and most of his dialogue is hype work that has zero thought put into it. This story also bashes fanon tropes, there is no civilian council, no Clan Restoration Act, Minato didn't chose Naruto because he wouldn't place the burden on anyone else but because he believed Naruto could handle the Kyubi (Unlike non-Uzumaki characters who would very likely die), adults can become Jinchuriki, Hiruzen's squad aren't running around doing evil - the worst thing they did in canon outside of Danzo was suggest that Naruto not be allowed to leave the village so Akatsuki couldn't capture him in the wild and Danzo was a cellar dweller retcon character who only appeared in part two to push Sai as a member of Team Kakashi and then later laments having to leave his comfortable underground bunker to become Hokage, Naruto wasn't getting beatings on the streets growing up from adults, they don't attack his house every October 10, etcetera etcetera and so on and so forth. So check your fanon baggage at the door. I do make my best attempt to explain the many many many plot holes in Naruto, and it is a lot of work that gets done in the first few chapters. Most importantly this story is first person subjective, enabling me to write from the PoV of an unreliable narrator. You will encounter this the most in flashbacks that deal with Slice of Life content, where Kiba narrates a story to be more cool or funny and by the end of it has to quickly explain what really happened by adding in details and observations he previously left out. This allows slice of life content to not get boring, but also brings the tone back down so that the story can continue at its normal level. I am aware that this technique shoots right over people's heads and I do it any way so that certain sections of the story don't get boring. You have been warned.
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An oversmart dog barking at me(no offence)that's what this whole fics writing felt like. I don't understand the phrase u use, feels a bit too complicated and hard to understand may that's because of my ignorance but still I think u should use simple language and not to complicate things. The story is good though.
great story, thanks author ![img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend][img=recommend] please keep writing [img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=update][img=recommend][img=recommend]
