funny bar mitzvah stories

Apocalypse: I Can See the HP Bar, Killing Monsters Drops Loot

April 4th. The apocalypse descended, mountains and rivers shattered, and the human world turned into purgatory. April 5th. "Brother Wang Tao, before I die, I ask you for a favor, please take care of my wife..." April 7th. Wang Tao unexpectedly discovered that he could not only see the HP bars of living creatures but also that the creatures he killed would drop loot! "Rest in peace, Big Brother. I will definitely take good care of your wife!"

Mountain Ghost Holds the Pen · Sci-fi

This Martial Saint's Health Bar is Too Thick!

In the twenty-seventh year of Hong Guang, the allied forces of seven nations invaded the Great Blue Dynasty. Rifled muskets, mortars, and armored vehicles combined into a steel tide, were ultimately shattered by the Great Blue's armored cavalry. Muscle, magic, firearms, cannons... the new and the old powers continuously collided. In an era of great strife, Li Fei, with the help of a Ten Thousand Blood Bead, gradually became an existence akin to a BOSS: 'Is this the extent of your damage? You haven't even taken off one-thousandth of my health.' 'You don't think this is enough to kill me, do you?' 'Don't rush, the second phase is up next!' ......

The Pen That Can't Fly · Eastern

My Skill Bar is Full of Monster Skills

Raine, who has arrived in a world of fantasy, unexpectedly discovers that his Golden Finger is not a proficiency panel but a Golden Finger that allows him to kill monsters and collect monster bloodlines. 【Name: Raine】【Classes: Farmer】【Blessed Bloodline: Ordinary goblin bloodline】【Bloodline Talent: High-speed Reproduction Lv2...Dexterity Lv1...】【Power: 5】【Agility: 5 (+1)】【Constitution: 5】【Intelligence: 7】【Perception: 5】【Charm: 5】 So, when he looks at those powerful or mutated monsters, many times he does not have the usual fear or dread of adventurers, but rather full of anticipation and hope...

17-pound catfish · Fantasy

Starting from a Bar to Sign Internet Celebrities

Chen Jincheng is reborn in the year 2018 with a "Life Simulation Game", and the game is bound to his MCN media company. Starting by signing the hottest nightclub DJ goddess from his past life in a bar, as he continuously receives rewards from the game, he signs more and more female online celebrities.

Call Me Xiao Guo · Urban

Global Dungeon: I Can See the Status Bar

The era of global dungeon has descended. Lu Wenwu awakens Eye of Insight, gaining the ability to see detailed information of creatures in dungeons. "Having met the Tathagata, why not worship?" In the dungeon, looking at the plump man with a wrapped head sitting on the lotus throne, Lu Wenwu frowned and protected the crowd in front of him. 【Tathagata Buddha/Celestial Demon (S)】hp: 1000/100000000 【Current Status】: Extremely Weak, Flesh and Blood Disguise, Pretending to be Calm, Skill Seal, Nervous Heh, so the Celestial Demon Tathagata Buddha is pretending to be strong. Take a punch from your Grandpa Lu!

Wolf Treasure Meow · Urban

Related Reviews

Angel_of_the_Lord

2021-04-01

This is so bar written. Funny cause I know the type of people who's writing it but omg you could've given a little more thought to the writing. It can be funny and not sound like you just making it up as you go.

That Time I Got Isekai’d To Another World With My Truck!!

RantCafe · Fantasy

26 Chs

JohnnieWalker

2022-01-30

-- table settings CFG['DRAW_TITLE_TEXT'] = true; TXT['DRAW_TITLE_TEXT'] = 'Show title text'; CFG['DRAW_TITLE_BACKGROUND'] = true; TXT['DRAW_TITLE_BACKGROUND'] = 'Show title background'; CFG['DRAW_BAR_BACKGROUNDS'] = true; TXT['DRAW_BAR_BACKGROUNDS'] = 'Show bar background'; CFG['DRAW_BAR_OUTLINES'] = false; TXT['DRAW_BAR_OUTLINES'] = 'Show bar outlines'; CFG['DRAW_BAR_COLORBLOCK'] = true; -- shows block at the front of the bar with player's color TXT['DRAW_BAR_COLORBLOCK'] = 'Show color block'; CFG['DRAW_BAR_TEXT_PADDING'] = 3; TXT['DRAW_BAR_TEXT_PADDING'] = 'Bar text padding'; MIN['DRAW_BAR_TEXT_PADDING'] = 0; MAX['DRAW_BAR_TEXT_PADDING'] = 35; CFG['DRAW_BAR_TEXT_PADDING_FIXED'] = false; TXT['DRAW_BAR_TEXT_PADDING_FIXED'] = 'Bar text at fixed positions' CFG['DRAW_BAR_USE_PLAYER_COLORS'] = true; TXT['DRAW_BAR_USE_PLAYER_COLORS'] = 'Show player bars with their assigned color'; CFG['DRAW_BAR_USE_UNIQUE_COLORS'] = true; TXT['DRAW_BAR_USE_UNIQUE_COLORS'] = 'Show each type of damage in a different color';

Multiverse Conquest: Rise of the Saiyan Empire.

Thunder_Dawn · Anime & Comics

Hungarian_Horntail

2026-01-22

Don't read the story. It's for your own well being. It's too good. Because for people who like reading Erotica and great stories in general , this story will raise the bar way high and then you will not be satisfied with other stories....

The Devil's Whisper in Naruto (SI/OC)

Vizem · Anime & Comics

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Autophile_nrc

2022-03-22

Hahahah mei chin adalah gambaran cewek bar-bar🤣 kalau udah KO kan udah bisa ditebak apa yang bakalan terjadi. Ya kan thor? Hahaha bar-bar bener wanita satu ini, agak ekstrim🤣

Perfect MISTAKE

Nunuk_Pujiati21 · Urban

5 Chs

Hunting girl, silly husband, pick up a husband to farm

The foolish husband that he had exchanged for a pound of flesh had a huge secret hidden in him. What choice would Zhou Yu, who was also plagued by secrets, make when faced with the trouble behind him? Zhou Yu: Are you leaving? A certain man: What is Yuyu talking about? He tilted his head. [Zhou Yu: Don't play dumb, I know you're fine.] [A certain man: I don't understand…] He hugged his wife. What was silly about it? Losing his wife was the most foolish thing.

Sour Plum Wine

· 7.1K Views

Reborn Yang Guo, I can plunder martial arts

During the Great Song Dynasty, the various countries were established side by side. Xixia, Dali, Khitan, Jin, Manqing, Mengyuan…Outside the court, the world of martial artists was even more exciting. Beggar's Sect, Shaolin Temple, Emei Sect, Wudang Sect, Five Mountain Sword Sect, Sun Moon Divine Sect, Carefree Sect, Murong Clan…There were even immortal cultivators who rode the wind, and the incarnation of a sword immortal broke through 3,000 armor… The urban youth woke up and traveled through this world, becoming the legendary Condor Hero Yang Guo before the story began. In the face of an unknown fate and the complicated world of martial artists, it was fortunate that he had the system with him. By killing his opponent, he could plunder his martial arts and internal energy… (The Ancient and Golden World is a combination. The setting has been magically modified and does not follow the original plot.)

Nine-tailed Black Carp

· 10.1K Views

Honored, at all costs

"Come with me!" Let yourself go. You don't owe him anything." Li Heng was an informant who helped him rise step by step, but he was covered in scars and bruises until he met Xu Shile. He walked step by step and warmed her whole world. She was framed and fell into endless darkness, becoming a wanted criminal. Even if the whole world did not believe her, Xu Shile believed her and protected her. "You can't catch me. You can't take this USB drive!" "That's not important. What's important is you!"

Leave me alone

· 3K Views

Loyal dog boyfriend, arrogant and wild

Lu Yiliang's biggest hobby was An Zhouwan. He only liked An Zhouwan and had liked her since university. "The world is big, but An Zhouwan is the most important." He once said to his best friend,"An Zhouwan is my life." He liked to say to others,"Food is the most important thing for the people, but I regard An Zhou's evening as the most important thing." Even though Lu Yiliang knew that he liked a thousand-year-old demon, even though he knew that An Zhouwan only treated him as her medicine, Lu Yiliang still loved him very much. The extent to which Lu Yiliang liked An Zhouwan could be summed up in three idioms-shameless, persistent, and devoted. In short, he had spent seven years chasing after his wife and spoiled her for a long time. After successfully wooing his wife, a certain man began to worry. " A human's lifespan is only a few decades, but you've ascended to become an immortal, so you can live forever." "Don't be afraid. I'll accompany you forever." The female immortal said gently. " But soon, I'll be old and yellow. You'll despise me." "Good-looking skins are the same, but interesting souls are one in a million. Don't worry, I like your soul." The female immortal smiled patiently. " But…" Lu Yiliang wanted to continue. " Shut up." An Zhouwan couldn't take it anymore." It's enough. I don't like trouble."

Jun Changjiu

· 5.8K Views

The Redemption of Football

[Brothers: I've just published a new book," Card Battle in the Era of BBCSSN Rampaging ". I hope to receive your support. Thank you very much.] An Italian Chinese player was forced to dive from a high platform after losing a football match. He accidentally got a mask. The mask could not directly add points to his football skills and attributes. He had to wear the mask in thousands of dungeon worlds and transform into different football star players, such as Quaresma, Dong Fangzhuo, Bagio, Azar... to complete various missions... so that the former star players no longer had regrets. It was called football redemption. For every savior he saved, the main character Sharkey's football ability increased by a little. Slowly, he also had the capital to punch Mbabpe and kick Harland. The real world had also entered the Three Kingdoms Era. Mbappe, Xia Qi, Harland…

Xia Qi Fu Ding

· 3.8K Views