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JokerHighJack
JokerHighJackLv103yr
2021-04-26 22:28

This review is made after chapter 10. Sadly i am going to have to drop this because of chapter 10. Honestly this was a five star story until chapter 10. With what that chapter does its makes the previous chapters useless an a waste of time to read. Its honestly a big slap to the face to all the readers. Its really sad as well because this was one of the best and most original Twilight FanFics i have read and it just gets tossed away like it doesnt matter. All for the main character to get reincarnated like every other twilight fanfic with his memories taken away as an added bonus.

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Replies16
RaGnAr_SK
RaGnAr_SKLv4

dude the Memories would be back again in some point. now would be really boring If they stayed like that this early.....the story would be finished in chapter 9.THIS a love story, drama is necessary.......and this Twist is original (for me at least). i hope you continue Reading .....

JokerHighJack
JokerHighJackLv10

I think there could have been a better way to do it. Also their could have been other ways to bring him into the right time of the Twilight movies or books. Also its never fun to read when a God has so much control over your mind.

RaGnAr_SK:dude the Memories would be back again in some point. now would be really boring If they stayed like that this early.....the story would be finished in chapter 9.THIS a love story, drama is necessary.......and this Twist is original (for me at least). i hope you continue Reading .....
RaGnAr_SK
RaGnAr_SKLv4

i understand your point, sure could be a better way to bring them to Canon Twilight, but the MC would be Just a expectator of the story, this Twist of the author helps in insert him in the story with buildind drama and romance, wouldnt be boring If they stayed together hapily until the end of the story??

RaGnAr_SK
RaGnAr_SKLv4

and Will be funny they falling in love and hate each other until he remembers her.

JokerHighJack:I think there could have been a better way to do it. Also their could have been other ways to bring him into the right time of the Twilight movies or books. Also its never fun to read when a God has so much control over your mind.
peterman00
peterman00Lv1

This is exactly what I feel.

RainInNight
RainInNightLv14

Read chapter 11-12 so far so good

JokerHighJack
JokerHighJackLv10

I have and i am not impressed honestly. i really did give it a try but the whole thing for me personally is ruined. If people like it they like it i just wanted to give an honest review

RainInNight:Read chapter 11-12 so far so good
RainInNight
RainInNightLv14

I know that why i said 11-12 good so far so some people who may like it won’t quit to soon and just check it oir

JokerHighJack:I have and i am not impressed honestly. i really did give it a try but the whole thing for me personally is ruined. If people like it they like it i just wanted to give an honest review
newthings
newthingsLv6

memory loss is too cliche

ghustV
ghustVLv5

It is implicit in the reincarnation tag that you have meta-knowledge or an outsider perspective (that's what ppl expect to see). If an reincarnated does not have it, then the history is about an OC.

venomwave
venomwaveLv12

eh... no? the mc may be reincarnated in a story without knowing , reincarnation has nothing to do with meta kwnoledge , an oc may also be reincarnated without meta knowledge , those are not mutually exclusive wheter he is reincarnated in a fictional story or not... you are just salty the mc doesn't remember twilight.

ghustV:It is implicit in the reincarnation tag that you have meta-knowledge or an outsider perspective (that's what ppl expect to see). If an reincarnated does not have it, then the history is about an OC.
ghustV
ghustVLv5

Wow, such a genius!... you and I are reincarnated MCS from fanfic too... WhAt? You don't remember... such a downer.

venomwave:eh... no? the mc may be reincarnated in a story without knowing , reincarnation has nothing to do with meta kwnoledge , an oc may also be reincarnated without meta knowledge , those are not mutually exclusive wheter he is reincarnated in a fictional story or not... you are just salty the mc doesn't remember twilight.
EnderPL
EnderPLLv6

Hahahhahahahhahahahhaha

ghustV:Wow, such a genius!... you and I are reincarnated MCS from fanfic too... WhAt? You don't remember... such a downer.
Transhumanist
TranshumanistLv14

Too true bro. I feel like I am a reincarnator too with hefty karma deficit.

ghustV:Wow, such a genius!... you and I are reincarnated MCS from fanfic too... WhAt? You don't remember... such a downer.
Ouroboros001
Ouroboros001Lv12

Nice save. thanks

Should_Be_Working
Should_Be_WorkingLv3

If he has no memories for an extended period, you might as well just made an oc no? Then you dont have to worry about how to explain the reincarnation stuff (god I hate the ROB or god & wishes troupe) and the readers would get to see how the oc mc lives through and affects the world him/her.

RaGnAr_SK:dude the Memories would be back again in some point. now would be really boring If they stayed like that this early.....the story would be finished in chapter 9.THIS a love story, drama is necessary.......and this Twist is original (for me at least). i hope you continue Reading .....
Other Reviews
sabada
sabadaLv13

TeaTop
TeaTopLv13
SnowRose
SnowRoseLv14

I know many reviews have already addressed the problem, however, I wanted to give my opinion as well. Up until chapter 10 this story is 5/5. It keeps you hook the entire way and you honestly cant help but fall for the characters. The author does an amazing job with character development and just making the reader feel like they are real people. The only issue was some grammar mistakes but it wasnt enough to take away from the emotionally gripping story. (The author only uses “he’s” for both “he’s” and “his” which is very weird. Readers have pointed it out constantly but the author doesnt seem like the type to go back and edit his work or really make changes to it. Not even talking about plot, just mistakes in writing which arent hard to pay attention too when writing the next chapter.) I did read past chapter 10 (at 23 as of writing this), and i must say it is a completely different story; in a bad way. Though i have started to see a glimpse of it possibly returning to how it was in this last chapter where the Mc and Love intrest meet once again, only time will tell if the author can actually bring it back or not. ...Major Spoilers ahead... On chapter 10, the Mc is killed before being turned. He is then reincarnated by some random god into the present timeline as a Shape-shifter with some changes. He is a close friend and childhood friend of Bella’s and the two are extremely close in a family way rather than as a romantic interest. So he essentially has 3 lives. -1st, Human on OUR earth. -2nd, Human in Twilight(past) with ties to Vampires; Mate of a Vampire. -3rd, Shape-shifter in Twilight(present) with ties to the Shape-shifters. In both the 2nd and 3rd lives he has memories of the first, yet the 3rd life has no memories of the 2nd. This causes many of the issues that the readers have. They are upset that he doesnt remember his second life when it was what got us into the story in the first place. They are upset that his personality has been changed (because he doesnt remember anything he experienced). And some more reasons. I honestly dont mind the premise but i think it was executed lazily. It was like the author just wanted to have the mc died and reincarnate into the timeline of the plot and did the first thing that came to his mind. I personally think the situation should have been... (Warning: This is my opinion. You are entitled to your own.) -Mc has an illness; Will die. -That illness seems to be burning up his body from within and no one can understand why (no vamp venom). -The Cullen’s decide to turn him to save his life but he doesnt last long enough. She regrets not turning him sooner and blames herself. Can still do the bear thing too. Though i feel like it wasnt needed, he could have died a number of ways. -Make it so his illness was actually an ‘illness’ of the soul and held similar properties to a Pheonix where in his first life he reached his destined ‘end’ and was reborn into a new life. Then in his second life, something happened causing his body to not be strong enough or contained something which caused his “attacks”, he again would reached his destined ‘end’ and is reborn into his current life. Thanks to being born as a Shape-shifter his body was able to adapt better to his unique illness and the outcome was a Lycan. -Due to the issues experienced with the second life he didnt manage to hold onto any memories and would need something to bring them back to the surface. -Due to not remembering his second life, he grew up to be a slightly different person than he was in the second life. He has the whole thing with Paula yet get rid of the lustful stuff and just make him not show romantic interest in anyone period. Their relationship is complicated with her pursuing him, yet something is holding him back, like a part of him is waiting for something. -He see’s Edythe again and has flashes of memories yet doesnt manage to fully bring them to the surface in that meeting because his 3rd life is rejecting them subconsciously due to them being foreign to him still. -Have Edythe start being a constant in his life and he feels closer to her than he has ever felt to anyone. He is plauged with flashes of memories for a while, then during some fight have him see her pendant somehow. -He regains most of his memories then but still doesnt know how to really feel as memories of his three lives cause him confusion. He doesnt know which is the true him and who he should be. -Have Edythe take him to the cabin and then they rekindle their love. -Paula becomes a source of drama as the Mc finds out about her imprinting him a while ago and he feels bad for her yet shows his stance of being with Edythe. -Paula doesnt give up and drama happens a lot between the two girls but its clear that Edythe is the main girl he loves. -At which point you could go in any direction with the romance. Thats how i personally would have had it play out but its not my story. Either way, ill continue to read and hope some of that earlier spark returns...and stop using that annoying “he’s” instead of “his” its not hard. :)

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