webnovel
LordSputnik
LordSputnikLv135yr
2019-12-27 08:58

Honest Review This one is hard for me to review as the genre is not one I normally read. I'll be a little generous with the stars. Overall though, you have a good story and if you can flesh out the grammar issues, many of the other issues will disappear as well if you ask me. The Good: Interesting plot, the characters have good chemistry and the FL doesn't annoy me which is a big plus. The Bad: The grammar... oh the grammar... I recommend Grammarly or getting an editor. I've probably misinterpreted some of the things that have been written, but I can't say for sure. Check your facts/units sometimes. You once gave a woman 100 inch hips, that's HUGE! Did you maybe mean 100 cm? 100 cm is much more reasonable. The Neutral: Short chapters... very short chapters, this breaks immersion in my opinion, but that is just my opinion. The structure is painful to read for me. One short sentence and a line break followed by another short sentence and a line break without grouping common sentences into paragraphs makes it look like just a lot of lines of text.

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stella2138
stella2138Author

thank you for the review. read further and you'll see that I've greatly improved. and yes, i use Grammarly for some 4 months now. I'll try to combine short chapters into one.

stella2138
stella2138Author

posted chapter 172

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