Kaori never signed up to be a ninja, in fact, her business had just started to show signs of success when she was thrown into the world of Naruto. All she wanted was a normal life, a cup of lukewarm tea, and maybe a pet pug... won't say no to a couple of millions. But here she was, somehow inducted into the ANBU's Barrier and Security department – a guaranteed low-key job of being stealthy and keeping tabs on some unimportant lamb. Except the world seemed hellbent on making her life a living hell. Then came the card system – now, she can collect cards that grants jutsus, tools, rare bloodline abilities, and even... people. Talk about a game changer! The gears in Kaori's mind started to turn. Maybe, just maybe, she could carve out her own little force, a small ninja army that could ensure that she survives the world-ending wars each Friday, and maybe even get a decent retirement. Her new mission seemed promising enough – a simple surveillance job. "It's a simple enough job, all you have to do is keep an eye on someone." "Who?" "Oh, no one important... just Kushina Uzumaki." "...Who?" {UPDATE} {Must Read: Before anyone starts reading, please let me remind them that this is a crackpot comedy with 50% nonsensical comedy! So read at your own risk and please do not complain that the MC is not taking things seriously... cause she's not supposed to.} Discord Link just in case anyone wanna join: https://discord.gg/yV4CmEx9 ***{You can support my writing on my patron at: patreon.com/echoingdusk}*** ***{Once Again: 'Support' is not a transaction but support as in supporting the author writing... if that makes any sense at all.}***