Comments of chapter undefined of Into The Kaleidoscope

hmm, if you want to, like do you find them unsatisfactory, then do it, otherwise don't.

You don't have to rewrite but instead have this extremely stupid play blow up in his face. It could be a very good learning curve to stomp out his arrogance and narcism and develop him a character. Yeh, no relationship with the Starks but he's learned from past mistakes kinda thing.

I don't know enough about game of thrones to know if they were a mistake or not. Also does unlimited bullet works work against things like the undead?

if you like the direction you're going in continue, I find that you are going to get farther if you like what you write.

I think it's a cool idea to be some kind of prophet of the old gods but I think holding them at gun point and threating them to belive it is a bit much idk could be me

pls rewrit

I thought they were fine, but it just feels a bit jumpy with how quickly stuff started, but at the same time the whole negotiation scene feels a bit long. I do agree with another commenter that it should blow up in his face, or result in some kind of learning experience.

The only thing that grinded my gears was the behavior of Ned Well that can be explained with pur Mc lacking any proper etiquette All in all everything is good

Prologue probably did it for most people, I myself dropped it bc it was super long. Only re-read because I was super bored. I haven't watched much of GoT but it was a medieval political series with some magic elements. I didn't really think it was the best place for the main character to start off in, but I guess it's the place where he uses his intelligence the most rather then blowing stuff up. Also this is WN, I doubt people appreciate having the MC being questioned a lot and being looked down upon. It felt like a play, that could blow up in his face later. I don't think you need to re-write anything but just have MC rely less on his meta knowledge to trick other people.

Dude, reread the chapters, if you like it and see that it's progressing as you imagined, don't rewrite. If you Rewrite just because your readers don't like it, you won't like the story any more in the future, because you'll feel like it's not your story anymore. that's not your job just going to be writing what readers want.

I don't know enough about game of thrones to say one way or another but it seemed like a bit of a bump but not a major downside to the plot. He could have definitely leveraged the information he had by acting more mysterious and prophesy-like until within closed doors then reveal he knows more than he should in front of his kids who he can't just have killed.

I would say yes because it was way to bold for me and hes supposed to be annalytic and smart but he went head first and challenged them of course he had a plan but it seemed to risky for someone who was expained to like to be in control always

I don’t know much about GOT, but I think you portrayed characters well enough and the MC’s behavior fell in line with his characteristics, so I think you’re fine.

i did disliked the last 2 chapters, but i said nothing to not be disrespectful.

if you want to rewrite it's fine if you didn't like it, I particularly like it, your writing is not the same as many authors that's what catches my attention, I always try to read fics or originals that don't follow the same standards I like the different ones, thanks for the chapter.

Yes

Eu gostei. So quero saber como você vai continuar dai

No I like them