Sakura: What's this addictive feeling of annoyance?

**Sakura POV**

"So why don't we start with me then, when I'd become a baby I was actually really surprised you know, it was confusing as hell and I was wondering what'd happened to me! I didn't even realize I was in a girl's body. You know baby head's are heavy so I couldn't really move around all that much. And there was something much more interesting to keep my attention!" Anish talked as a sparkle shown in his eyes.

"Hehe, yeah I remember you looking at the paper pinwheel as if it was your mortal enemy!" I remembered the time he was bobbing his head around to get a better look at the pinwheel and then trying to eat it, I couldn't understand if what I was looking at was a baby or not because of that.

"Hehe, yes! I was fascinated by how the pinwheel seemed to moved without any external source of energy! I couldn't see the wind nature chakra that was moving out of the edges earlier, so I was confused, a lot! I thought it was supposed to be hard to do that or something."

I was really surprised about that too. I never knew mum could do chakra nature manipulation, that's at least at the level of a chunin! I guess she has some secrets to hide, or well... I guess she doesn't love me?

"Then I found out that I was given a girls name! And mom wouldn't shut up about it! She was so adamant about picking the name Sakura it felt like she'd abandon me if that wasn't the name I chose. Hehe, she loves you so much."

".....I guess."

"But you know it still didn't click with me that I could be a girl, I didn't really know about the culture of the place so I hoped that it was perhaps an androgynous name? But I was still a little disappointed I wasn't named Megumin! I know one amazing Megumin from an anime! There's even a guy that's named Megumi a boys name who is quite cool too. Oh their posters are on the wall! There and there!" He said as he pointed on the wall beside us, one a poster of a girl in red robes with a long staff and an eye patch standing in a weird posture with her hands outstretched with the words Explosion written in a comedic font below her, while another was a group picture with three people like my team seven, two boys and a girl, wearing a vibrant blue almost violet uniform of sorts, he was pointing at the boy with two dogs with him, is he from something like the Inuzuka clan?

"Why do you have so many of these paintings anyway?" I asked as I noticed the walls were filled with painting all over them some overlapping the other.

"You don't get it!! They are my life!! The people in these posters were with whom I grew up!"

"... But weren't they characters in an a- anime? Is that it?"

"Yeah! You're right, but that doesn't change the fact that I grew up with them!"

"I… I see. I'd like to watch them if they actually are so good." I was creeped out a little with the fervor he was talking about them, so I tried being polite about it, but his eyes started twinkling so much after I said that. I thought there was a new type of dojutusu in them.

"I'm sure you can in the future! Anyway! Then later I found out after Kushina and Minato that I was in the world of the anime called Naruto!"

"Do you know why the anime is called Naruto?"

"Oh because he was the main character of the anime, also because he becomes Ninja Jesus in the end."

"Jesus?"

"Eea.... well just use the word hero, Ninja hero for now."

"So he's a hero? Why not Sasuke??!"

"I mean he was the main rival for the main character, so they were both ninja hero's in a way, Sasuke was just the guy who was supposed to loose in the end after he fought with Naruto, you can't have the main character loose now can you?"

"I… think I get it?"

"Yeah, forget about that, you'll understand what I was talking about as you watch more anime yourself sometime." I heard him say that, but I didn't think I would watch any, at least not until I'd defeated Kaguya or sealed her up so that I could live happily with Sasuke afterwards.

"So then?" I asked, nodding at him to continue.

"Yeah, then I was enjoyed myself being a baby for a while, since I could nothing but eat, sleep and poop. after which I spent my remaining time trying to figure out how to warn people of the Kyuubi disaster without getting myself caught in the process! You know so that no one thinks I'm some sort of spy and ends up taking me away from mom and dad and then reading my memories."

"Mom? Dad?" I just realized he'd called my mum and dad, his mom and dad.

"Hey, they're my parents too now!"

I felt uncomfortable seeing someone calling my mum and dad their mum and dad too but I didn't want to argue.

"So, how do you feel having an elder brother with you?!?" Anish asked wiggling his eyebrows in the weirdest way possible bringing me out of my thoughts, into pit of fury.

*BAM*

"Argghhhhh! My heart! It can no longer take the weight!! My little sis is hitting on me!"

*BAM**BAM*

"Aghhh!!!! Fine! Fine! I won't expose the fact my sister likes to hit on m-"

*BAM**BAM**BAM*

"AGHHHH!!!! Fine alright! No joking."

"So? Got any problem with me calling mum mum and dad dad?"

"I do you bastard! They're mine! Not yours!" I snapped at him.

"Hehe, but I had the body before you!"

"But that doesn't make it alright to do so!! And you're a boy in the first place!!!" Why was I doing this? Why was I engaging in a conversation with this random person who had hijacked my body from me?

"How do you know if you were a boy or a girl before your rebirth?!"

"You- you!!! You're not from this world! And I know I was a girl! I obviously was always a girl."

"Maybe other people aren't too, but they just don't know!? And you were probably a volcano with how easy to anger you-"

*BAM*

"Argggghhhhh…. Go away I don't care! Stop talking about this or I'll make you wish you went away earlier!" I punched him, tired of trying to argue with him and hoped my punch would knock some sense into his seemingly empty head.

"Hehe, so yeah I was trying to find out a way to get the information across to Minato so that he could fight off Obito and protect Kyuubi from destroying the village."

"Wasn't that when you slipped a paper with those weird drawings to Kushina-san."

"Weird drawings? You didn't understand them?"

"How could anyone!?"

"But- but it was so clear! Enemies on one side, good people on the other, the kamui sharingan had some stars around it along with the fourth's teleportation kunai which also had some stars to show they were both space jutsus! And then that Kyuubi with the sharingan eyes! How wasn't it clear! It had all the pieces of the puzzle, you just had to figure it out!"

"That's such a stupid way to do it. You could've just written it like a ninja would when sending information and it would've been enough."

"But I didn't know how to do that though! At least I was smart enough to improvise!"

"You should've figured it out! Or that just means you're dumb!"

"Argghhhh, just let me go on!"

I smirked as I watched Anish get as annoyed as I was with him, even though my logic was flawed a little, just a little.

"You! You're smirking at me!" *GASP* he clutched his heart! "How could you! You trapped me to take revenge on me! For calling mum mum and dad dad!" He said suddenly as he found me out, perhaps my smirk had been too revealing?

"Of course it is not! It's because you're stupid!" I reiterated to hide my pettiness. 

"But how could I figure out how ninja write! How would a baby find that out!?"

"Like how you call mum mum and dad dad."

"But that's logical!"

"Then this is also logical!"

"Do not think you've won! I will get you back!

"Hehe." I laughed without meaning to.

"Hmpf, so then I spent my time baby sitting other babies when I was placed with them, and then the Kyuubi incident happened it felt quite scary-"

"Why did you help the Uchiha then?" I quickly diverted the topic, I didn't want him to remind me that I was the one who actually got so scared when I felt the murderous aura of the Kyuubi. I couldn't believe it then that this was the same Kyuubi that Naruto was taking help of and was helping everyone during the war with. The murderous intent at those few moments felt so thick that I couldn't stop falling into a spiraling fear that I'd loose my new life before I could even let mum and dad know I was here, but I at least got myself together to help mum out of the concussion by creating chakra in my baby body.

"Did you know why the Uchiha was masacered?"

"Yeah wasn't it because of Danzo?" Wasn't this when we fought against Sasuke to bring him back and he tried to....

"It was but it was also because no one else would support them after the Kyuubi incident since they didn't help during the incident because Danzo asked them not to."

"Ah, so everyone thought they were on Danzo's side?" I reasoned, some politics had rubbed off on me from being close to Tsunade-sensei during her time as the Hokage.

"Yeah, pretty much, I think so as well, and I think, just a guess, even the third Hokage didn't want Danzo to gain more power than him so he later took in a spy in the Uchiha called Shisui, who was actually quite a good guy, to at first weaken Danzo's support from the Uchiha."

"But Danzo trapped them all in his plan by tricking everyone in to believing that the Uchiha was going to rebel, and since people thought the Uchiha were under Danzo's support they assumed what Danzo was saying was true and he was loyal to the village while the Uchiha were not, which Shisui also agreed was true?" I completed.

"That's true but it wasn't just that there were more things in play like the Uchiha's arrogant attitude, or how Danzo kept spreading rumors about the police force and creating trouble for people so that the police force would look bad, all these must've been the few among a ton of others."

"Then why didn't the Uchiha reach out?"

"The Uchiha ended up getting isolated from the village even though they didn't do anything, to them they were the descendants of Madara who founded the village and hence a strong political power in their own right so why would they need another person's support? Even if they did I'm sure Danzo would've done something to sour the relationships by killing ninja's from each other's clans while on missions to provoke both of them against each other, divide and rule. And even then they chose not to settle diplomatically, they chose to just make the threat to rebel since the village was disregarding one of its founding clans."

"So then Danzo used this situation as a reason to get them killed."

"Yeah, so after the Kyuubi incident I wanted to show the Uchiha that if they simply talked to another person, tensions although not completely erased could at least be lessened. I don't know if it'll work but there isn't any harm in trying it out."

"Hmmumm." Poor Sasuke-kun he stopped smiling since that day, I thought, perhaps what Anish did would help him out?

"So, shortly after the Kyuubi incident was when I found out how to use Chakra! You don't know how excited I was! Oh and yeah it was around this time I learnt how to control myself to not pee and poo poo on myself! It was so embarassing!!!" Anish said, but he was trying to hold back his embarrassment.

"Haha! I still remember that!!! You a grown up brat still peed every time you slept!!!!! HA!" I found another thing to annoy him with, this is getting addicting, the feeling of annoying him.

"Oh! Wasn't it Sakura who peed herself and poo pooed her self while she slept, since it's your body isn't it!?"

"Argghhhhh….." I only now realized I'd walked into the trap he set up since couldn't say it wasn't since then that'd mean I was saying this was his body and not mine. Clever.

"Haha! I told you I'd have my revenge on you!"

"Then we moved to the new house and I've been making a few things I want to for the future after I figured a few things out I could do with chakra and ink. Haha! I'm a genius."

"What are those squiggly lines you keep drawing everywhere!?"

"Hehe, secret! I'm sure I'll explain it to you in the future when I have something more presentable but until then wait for it! I'm sure you'll love it though, most people should. If it is developed properly other things using it could be built which would make ninja's useless after all."

"What!? Tell me!!"

"Hehe as I said! S-e-c-r-e-t, Isn't a woman entitled to her secrets!?"

"But you're a man!!!!!"

"But I'm in your body right now!!!"

*BAM*

"Arrgghhhh!!! You miserable person!! Why are you punching my head so much! I might become dumber because of you!"

"Good for you."

"Soo…. What about you?"

I looked at his eyes that seemed to glow and felt a warmth in my hands, at some point without realizing it I had held his hands during the conversation. It was probably because it was after such a long time I've been allowed to be like this, in control of myself, because all this time-

**Anish POV**

"It was lonely." I heard Sakura whisper, with a tremble as if she just realized what she was feeling, her head held down, hiding her tears, weak and vulnerable.

I shifted myself to her side and Put my arm around her, softly wrapping her in a thin blanket that I conjured as she laid her head on my shoulders burying her face into it, all while she tightened her grip on my other hand.

"You know, during the war. I saw so many people die in front of me, for the first time in my life. People were dropping left and right, no matter where I looked it was just death all around. A few people screamed at their enemies in their last breaths while a few cursed their own village for their deaths a few others even cursed their own comrades on the battle field. Then Naruto died and it was only then I realized I'd never really thought what a ninja does or what a ninja was meant to do, you know. Even during all our missions I never saw anyone get killed by the 'good guys' us team seven. And the only time I ever saw someone die was when Haku died when I was young, even that was Haku sacrificing himself to protect Zabuza, it was something noble, not senseless, not meaningless. And the other time was when Zabuza killed those bandits with a kunai in his mouth to avenge Haku. Every other time, like during Gara's rescue and during the Pain assault who ever the enemy killed was revived or saved." Sakura explained in a single breath, wanting a listener, wanting someone to recognize her problems and confusions.

"Hmm hmmm." I just hummed along as I patted Sakura's back and stroked her hair softy.

"Then during the war I developed a sense of hatred towards Obito and Madara for having killed so many people just to make the world into what ever they wanted it to be. I was furious." Sakura said with fire burning in her eyes as she separated from me and then looked right through me as if her enemy was standing right behind me.

"When Obito was about to die I felt so happy! But Naruto! Like always was trying to be good to him! He doesn't deserve a shred of it!! Just because someone killed the one who you loved what gives you the right to burn the whole world!!!? I was furious at everyone that said nothing. That just let it happen. So when I had to stab out Obito's eyes to keep away Madara from gaining power, I couldn't, I was afraid, that if I let the kunai in my hand come in contact with him, I'd be stabbing it through him, not only his eyes. I felt useless. I felt useless against the senselessness of people."

"Then when Madara was betrayed I felt so happy that this would finally end. It was only then that I realized someone new had popped out and the war was still going to go on…"

*sigh*

"And then in spite of all my training, all my hard work all I could do was help teleport Obito around using my chakra. Even after everything I did, the best I could do was be a glorified chakra bag even that for someone I hated. Haha." Sakura gave herself a self deprecating laugh.

"And then I was here. In this body, where I could control anything even more. It felt harsh you know. Why am I the one that has to always feel inadequate? I couldn't do anything during the fight with pain, I had to wait for Naruto to show up. Even Hinata jumped in but I didn't. I just watched as Tsunade-sensei, gave up her chakra to save as many people as she could, while I was just crying."

I stopped stroking Sakura's hair which caused her to look up at me with a hint of confusion in her dead eyes.

"What?" she asked in a wry voice.

"You aren't really useless."

"But I-"

"If you compare yourself to those two idiots of course you'd feel that way-"

"Don't tell me that I shouldn't feel useless because there are people worse than m-"

"No, my young padawan." I interrupted smiling a little changing the mood as I ruffled her hair again to change her mood.

"Then?" She asked irritated I was messing her hair and ignoring anything she didn't understand using context to fill it.

"You'd be miserable no matter who you compare yourself to. The two people who you're comparing yourself too have something that was given to them and made powerful overtime by several other people, of course they'd be stronger than you. They have weapons built by the minds of several powerful people after all. You in comparison don't have such leisure. You spent what ever time you had honing your craft to save lives, while the others spent it honing themselves to take one. You have much to learn my student."

"But Tsunade-sensei would've done better!"

"Of course she'd have done better! She's been through two wars! She's already seen everything that you have. Already answered her questions, or at least found enough answers to move on after she'd already broken down once with the hemophobia. You on the other hand have just begun! You never even used nature transformation, you don't know sage mode, you don't know how to use any weapons professionally. Hell if you knew half the things that Naruto does you'd be throwing him into a bin in every punch." I said tapping her fingers to count the reasons so that she could see them herself when she looked at her hands.

"Then what should I do to get stronger!?" Sakura asked closing her fist after looking at the reasons I counted out for her.

"Why do you want to be stronger?"

"So that I can help more people!"

"Wouldn't you already be doing that if you just improved your healing skills? Make a new healing jutsu perhaps or something like that?"

"I would do that if the world was not headed to where ever it is going right now."

"I see, so where is it headed?"

"It is headed towards a war! Why are you asking these questions!?"

"Then what do you need to fight a war?"

"A weap-"

I just nodded at her as she stopped herself mid sentence.

"I need to become a weapon! I'm weak because I'm not a weapon!"

"See, you got it! Your Dao seems to be pure to have understood and uttered such a profound statement." I said stroking my imaginary long beard.

"Hahaha!!!! Thank you!!!!!!" Sakura exclaimed as she hugged me in excitement even though she missed my joke, hugged me hard, real hard, breaking a few bones here and there in the process hard.

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Thank you for reading! 

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