17 An encounter by chance? A turning point in History?

"So?" The guy sitting behind a desk asked me as he looked down on me exaggeratedly tilting his whole body over the desk as if I was an ant.

"Hello Sir! Do you have general books about history!" I replied maintaining my cool as I was beside mum and he was younger than me.

"And why does someone as little as you want to know about history?"

"Ah! I read a book written by Mito-sama about Hashirama-sama with pretty pictures in it! I also want to read history and draw more pretty pictures!"

"Oh! A little girl like you has read books written by Mito-sama!" The librarian asked teasingly.

"I'll have you know I'm not a little girl!" I replied folding my hands, since this guy was getting annoying.

"Haha, sure, what ever you say kawaiko-chan."

"Haruno! My name is Ha - ru - no for you!" Goddamn brat thinks it s cute to annoy a child, the veins on my forehead throbbed.

"Hehe, Kawaiko-chan, the books about history are in the back by the right side where there are no windows. Do let me know if you aren't able to reach any books, I will pick them out for you."

I narrowed my eyes at the bratty late teenage boy in front of me, while a part of me wanted to stand and argue with him about the nickname he seems to have found suitable for me, the other part was in a hurry to learn more about this new world I had found myself thrust into and wanted to fulfil my curiosity that had been suppressed for over a year.

So I sighed out all the frustration of being treated as a child by random strangers and made my way towards the history section when I felt the familiar connection form in my head that had formed for the last week.

'Hehe, he called a brat like you Kawaiko-chan! Ha HA!'

'Go to hell you crazy girl! What about you? What should I call you? Sasuke-kun? Those were the only words you spoke the whole anime some might think it was your name.'

'Don't you dare insult Sasuke-kun!'

'If comparing him to you is an insult then aren't you the useless one here?'

'It's alright if it's Sasuke-kun.'

'Argghhh I should've just left you alone. You've just become more insufferable.'

'Hey! You were the one who brought him up.'

"I will be back home by myself mum, you don't have to wait for me. I'm sure dad wanted to take you out today, have fun!" I said as I waved at her with a smile while walking deeper into the aisle.

"Hehe, bye Sakura-chan! I hope you have fun! Remember to come home by noon! I want you to meet someone soon!" She waved at me until I left her sight, loosing myself to the rolling meadows filled with the shadows of knowledge.

'The Founding of the Five Great Nations.'

'The Great Professor Hokage.'

'Future by the Second Hokage'

'The Warring State Era'

'Wars Between Nations.'

'Evolution of Jutsus.'

There were quite a few books on the last shelf but only a few which stood out either because of their thickness or because of the obvious decorative gold stuck to the books in an attempt to give them colour.

Books in the village were mostly handwritten since there was no printing press yet which made the library the only source of knowledge for the public, it was built by the Senju clan and donated to the village during its founding which is why it's name is the Library of a Thousand Books, a play on the words that describe the Senju Clan, the Thousand Hands Clan.

Picking out the book about the 'Warring State Era' and the one titled 'Wars Between Nations' I sat down on a nearby table and cracked open the book whose spine looked untouched and began to delve into the depths of its contents as the smell of wood and ancient books surrounded me lulling me into their sense of timelessness.

The first chapter of the book was surprisingly the story of a relatively unknown character from the Naruto anime, not Hashirama Senju or even Tobirama Senju but Toka Senju. She was a random non noble clan member of the Senju clan, and always advocated for peace between clans, especially the Senju and the Uchiha as they were the largest clans in the area. She fought her way through the wars up the ranks until she was just below Tobirama Senju. She was not only powerful enough to harm Hashirama in Taijutsu even with his regeneration but could also single handedly turn the tides of war by healing everyone on the battle field and breaking them out of Genjutsu since she could almost never be trapped in it against her own will. You've got to remember! This was not just some random clan's genjutsu, this was the Uchiha's genjutsu, the Uchiha who use Sharingan.

She lost her life when she single handedly fought against the First Raikage and a group of cloud of ninjas. But she still injured him enough to for him to die after a week due the injuries he suffered in the battle.

She reminded both me and Sakura of another person who was quite important in the anime, Tsunade Senju.

…

*Knock* *Knock*

I jumped at the sudden knock on the table that I was sitting at, which broke my focus, only to first have to scrunch up my nose because of the strong smell of alcohol that slammed into me with the same force as the truck that sent me here.

Looking up I spotted a woman who looked to be in her early twenties, had blonde hair tied into twin tails that laid on her green haori which rested on her shoulders over the gray kimono style blouse, curiously a blue diamond mark rested in between her eyebrows. Her eyes seemed red and puffed up.

'Sensei!' Sakura exclaimed inside my head.

"Tsunade" I mumbled softly in a daze, confused, but the lady raised her eyebrows at it.

"Since when did little kids start saying their elder's names without any honorifics!?" She said as she brought her fist down on me, which terrified me.

As I watched the fist come down on me I instinctively threw the book in my hand into her face to distract her as I ducked and rolled under the table, coming out from the other side only to have to watch her smash her fist through the chair I was sitting on without breaking anything else about the chair, like a bullet passing through paper.

A chill passed through my spine bringing me to a ever important realization about the other person's strength.

'You dodged that....!' Sakura noted surprised.

"Ho. You dodged that." Tsunade noted knocking up her eyebrow.

Like master, like student I thought.

"Who are you?" I asked as if it wasn't obvious already, but I wanted to hear it from her voice.

"Don't you already know?" She asked raising her eyebrow confused, but I just stared back at her.

"Be grateful the ever radiant 'Cowardly and Weak Senju' Princess Tsunade Senju is grateful enough to forgive you for your lack of knowledge." She said striking a pose as she brought her right hand to her chest and her left hand towards me with the book I threw at her in it, which I never saw her catch.

My face contorted at the disgraceful self introduction she gave of herself. I hurriedly controlled my expression trying to extract myself from the mood I was while reading about Toka Senju. If there would've been any chakra in my body it'd have gone out of control too, courtesy to Sakura as both she and I felt something burn inside us when we heard that. Even though the both of us recognized that she was repeating something that was told to her, what we didn't understand was what brought this onto her.

'You got any idea why your sensei is acting this way Sakura?'

'She seems drunk.'

'But can't she not get drunk or something like that?'

'She can get drunk just fine, its just that she can get out of it when she wants to by healing herself.'

'Then why is she like this with random kids she doesn't know anything about?'

'I don't know, just play along for now. Maybe we'll learn something?'

'Can't I pretend that she's just some kidnapper and just walk away?'

'No, I already told you, the second you try to you'll just be pulled back by her because she'll instinctively see you want to hide something from her.'

"Cowardly?" I questioned back, the distortion in my voice clearly visible on my face as well.

Tsunade just walked over to me with heavy steps as I stared back at her as I felt she was trying to intimidate me.

As she came closer and my eyes met with hers I noticed her eyes were wet, as if she was holding something back.

Before I could do anything, she was holding me in her arms and sitting with me on a different chair with her head on the table as she just waited looking at me.

She looked, broken. She looked weak, but not vulnerable just contemplative, as if tethering on an edge as if about to shatter like a hammer above a mirror or a person with his neck in a guillotine counting down.

'What's with broken woman appearing around me nowadays? Did I become the protagonist in a harem novel?'

'Don't think such stupid things while you're in my body you asshole! And Sasuke is the only one for me!'

*Sighhhh*

With a sigh Tsunade closed her eyes and relaxed her tense shoulders but held me tighter. The sight reminded me of the times whenever things where I felt all confused since nothing was going my way, where my mind was hell bent on drowning me in my own failures and sorrows.

'Would you like to bet that she found out about how the Senju clan were vanishing and the experiments Orochimaru did on children using Hashirama cells?'

'Hey! You're betting on my Sensei here! Have some respect you brat!'

'If you win I'll allow you to see that anime thing I was talking about before.'

'...'

'Soo…?'

'If I win you teach me the basics of jutsus, deal?'

'....Deal.'

"Hey, little one." Tsunade asked opening her eyes with little focus.

"Yes?" I asked as I unconsciously start to run my tiny hands through Tsunade's hair mimicking what Jake did to me in such times, wondering about the possible reasons Tsunade had become like this, was it something I did that caused this or just something that had happened in the original but held no importance then which meant that whatever I did now might change something about the future?

'Hey Sakura know how your Sensei keeps her hair looking so good?'

'Anish!!!! Focus.'

'I gotta keep the hair on your head nice too you know?'

'....Later. Focus for now.'

Tsunade flinched a little but then let me comb her hair slowly.

"What would you think of a ninja who fears blood?" Tsunade asked in a low voice while closing her eyes and reminiscing about something.

She didn't seem to be done so I let her continue.

"What would you think about a princess who let her clan die?"

"What would you think about a girl who has not even her own home left to her anymore?"

As she spoke she slowly opened her glazed moist eyes and looked into mine, with a flushed face, I could feel her body getting warmer while her hands got colder making her tremble in cold with a sort of self imposed placebo fever one gets when they're feeling terrible.

'Do you think I can pretend to be a child to get out of the conversation Sakura?'

'No, just go about it as you can.'

My combing paused for a moment as I pondered why she was talking to me about all this, but then continued as I responded.

"I don't think anything special about such a ninja, princess and girl. They are all the same. They are all looking at something they failed at before, something they are no longer. Failure does not ask the ninja to stop pursuing growth, or a princess to forget the people who laid their lives for her in the past to protect her as the princess or will do in the future to let her be one. Neither does the failure stop the girl from bringing someone to be waiting for her at home. As long as they have given their all it is no longer theirs to control, it is the situations that failed them, so they have a lot to look forward to, a lot to keep surfing over."

"But the ninja is tired of loosing her comrades again, the princess of loosing her clan again, and the girl of her family again."

"You were alone when you were born, and you will be alone when you will die. You can neither change that for yourself, or someone else. No matter how much you love the other person to death, they will still die separately from you, alone, just as your death is a phenomenon unique to you. Only your life is yours to take charge of."

"Then it is the world that has taken everything that was theirs?" she asked with a little anger but further resigned anguish.

"No, the world has taken nothing that was theirs. The people they lost were never theirs in the first place, they belong to the world just like they always did. Just as you are and one day you will."

"But it feels so hard….so painful to let go." She said as she clutched me tighter.

"Of course it does. As long as you decide to live as the ninja that stopped to grow when she failed, or the Princess that stopped being one after she found the sacrifices of her clan members, or the girl who stopped inviting people to her house because she lost the people that used to live there, you will feel pain. You will feel pain as long as you live your imaginations without at least letting a part of yourself remain in touch with the now, with what, or who is around you, or who you are. The pain is your imagination's to bear, not yours, you can choose to remain in your imaginations as long as you want to. But then you'll just feel pain because you're missing out on everything that is right in front of you and that is to come to you as you move on."

'How can you tell that to someone! How can you-'

'I'm not asking her to forget them. I'm asking her to build on and finish what they have begun. If she feels so bad for the dead then at least do what they wanted her to do if she can.'

"But how does the ninja grow? How do I be the princess after I have caused so many to die? And how do I invite someone to be family again when I'm still alone!?" she asked a little furious.

'Hey Sakura this is getting weirder and weirder, how do you get her to heal herself, I'm running out of words to say.'

'I dunno she just always was ready when ever something important happened.'

'I see.'

"Nothing. You don't have to do nothing. You cannot grow. As long as you don't put what you imagine you are to sleep you cannot have the freedom to choose what you want to be to pretend to grow. You just have to put your past to sleep, if you do so you will find you are already awake and in control of whatever you want to be in the future."

I pulled out a toothpick from my pocket and under the stunned gazes of both Tsunade and Sakura I swung my hand holding the toothpick towards her open eye.

"See, as long as you're whining you'll miss those around you who can poke you and the people around you, but if you choose to act you can control if you let them harm you more. Time waits for no one." I said as Tsunade sobered up and held my wrist right before the toothpick pierced through her eyeball.

'Why did you do that?'

'Didn't you tell me that she sobered up whenever something important happened?'

'Yes but why did you do that?'

'To show her she's not using her eyes but her imagination to look around.'

'How would she understand that?'

'If she doesn't then her Dao is too impure and her cultivation is weak.'

'What?'

'Hey shut up. I'm not a psychiatrist. I don't know what I'm doing. Leave me alone.'

"So sleep?" she asked, as a statement rather than a question.

"Yes sleep."

"Ok sleep." she said as she felt my tiny hands bring a little warmth to her cold body and closed her eyes before she breathed a sigh of relief.

Slowly opening her eyes she gazed over me and all of a sudden started rubbing her cheek onto mine which caused me to make a funny expression by scrunching up my face since I didn't like a random person doing it to me, but since she was Tsunade and seemed to want it right now I gave up and let her do as she pleased as I had no way to escape.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You look so silly, you cutie."

(ಠ ∩ಠ)

"Hmpf! I won't talk to you! Go away you child kidnapper!"

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

I turned my head away from her as I hid the smile on my face that came by because of her infectious laughter which looked much better on her face.

"Hehe! TICKLE TICKLE!!!" Tsunade shouted and started to tickle me until I couldn't hold myself anymore and erupted!

"HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!! STOPPPEE!!!!!"

"Hehe! Little girl what's your name!?"

"Sakura!"

"Oh! Sakura-chan! How are you so cute!"

"Of course! I'm cute! I'm the cutest in the world!"

'Damn I'm not a man in this life but as long as I'm in a girl's body I'm gonna own it. Humu! Humu!'

'Shut up! You bird brain its my body!'

'Nobody like you Sakura, go away! I shall sprinkle salt to exorcise you if you come back again before tomorrow.'

"Alright Sakura-chan! Will you come here again tomorrow!?"

"Yes I will come here tomorrow in the morning again! Do you want me to wait for you!?"

"Hehe! Yes this princess will grace you with her presence!"

"Ha! Who cares about you and your princess tittle!"

*Bonk*

"Ouch!!! You old ha-" I shut my mouth as a dangerous aura erupted from Tsunade.

"Ol- older beautiful sister!" I stuttered and hurried to correct myself.

"Haha, yes! I'm a beautiful older sister! Fine! Chibiske! I will be back tomorrow! I have a few important things to take care of right now!"

"Alright! Nee-san! I'll be waiting for you!!" I said as she placed me down.

Remembering something I suddenly started running towards the entrance while shouting at Tsunade. "Nee-san!!! Remember to pay for the broken chair!"

I could feel the cold aura she began to radiate, so I quickly made up by turning back and saying.

"Nee-san! Take care of yourself! Don't forget to eat lunch!! And keep smiling! It looks good on you!!" and then began to run away again, but this time without the cold feeling running down my back but a warm gaze that looked over me instead.

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