The Tea Party, Part 4: Dinner At Grandma’s

Hyrule; Hebra Mountains

Gon had returned to his sector for the night, while Panini remained at Bisky's cabin. It was past midnight and the vice-leader had fallen asleep. As Bisky enjoyed another cup of tea, she looked down to Cheren, who had just passed out after climbing out of the hole for the umpteenth time. After making sure Panini was fast asleep, the Drill Sergeant climbed down and approached Cheren. "I'll give you credit: you didn't stop trying once. Even after losing your bending, your three years of training have made you more durable and more determined. Hmm…"

Bisky lifted him over her shoulders and carried him up to the cabin. She set him by the fire to warm his frosted body, cooked up meat and fruit, and slipped them into his mouth while she helped him chew. "I have a reputation to keep up, so I can't allow anyone to see me being so generous." After feeding him, she began to clean the dirt off his body and rub medicine over his scratches. "But you are a mortal, Cheren. Like the rest of us, you need to eat, bathe, and sleep. Otherwise, your chi will deplete itself and your training will be pointless. I will admit, though… you being a normal human might make you a better leader than ever. Being able to survive with natural skills and strength can inspire people. …Of course, that will only be up to your performance."

…

"Yaaaawn…" As soon as morning rose, Cheren stretched life back into his arms and legs. "Man, I feel great! I can't believe I slept so—WEEEEEELLLL!" He walked off the cliff into the hole, making a great splash.

"Climb back up and give me 200 push-ups." Bisky ordered, sitting on a diving platform while drinking tea.

Sweetopia; Chocolatown

Chocolatown was a town completely built with chocolate, from houses, roads, to fountains, and the water. The town had a mild chill so that the chocolate stayed hardened, and it was especially cold at night, with Ice Torches alit to provide light. Lala's chocolate mansion was set on a hill east of town, and tonight, it was defined by a ponytailed giant sitting outside it.

"Check it out, guys!" Sasha grinned mischievously, sitting cross-legged as she dangled giant bags of chips and Pretzels in her hands. She was sitting outside a chocolate mansion while Terry and Lola stood on a balcony in their pajamas. "You wouldn't think Amazonia would make good snacks, but they do. Nicked a bunch of them and made off scot free. Hope you ain't watching your weight."

"So you stole them, is that the deal?" Terry inquired.

"Man, loosen up. We're pirates, it's what we do."

"You're everything I aspire to be!" Lola gave thumbs-up.

"Yeah, but don't expect me to sneak you into Liquor Island, though. Stupid Pawtucket doesn't let in anyone under 21, even his own crewmen. Plus, his Chumba-Wumbas kick ya REALLY hard in the shin, even though they're so tiny." She rubbed her knee, which had become sore from the memory.

"Who's Pawtucket, your boss or something?" Terry asked.

"Yep." Sasha tore open a bag of potato chips and began to eat them. "He looks like a worm, but he's a monster waterbender. To make it worse, he can turn any liquid into alcohol."

"How is THAT possible?"

"Duh, he ate the Beer-Beer Fruit. And believe me, he hasn't taken a good bath SINCE." She waved a hand by her nose.

"Can he still get drunk?" Lola asked.

"Nope, not really. He wins a helluva lot of contests. Okay, now YOU gotta tell me about one of YOUR teammates!"

"Why the hell would we do that?!" Terry shouted.

"C'mon, don't try to fool me." Sasha leaned her head closer, smiling wryly. "You're spying for the Kids Next Door, aren't you?" she whispered. "I mean, we totally know you're operatives."

Terry fixed a glare on the giant. "Get ready for a fight, Lola."

"Boy, I would cream you like a banana berry. Relax, I'm not gonna rat you out or anything. I really like you squirts! But hey, if you plan an invasion or something, I might have to attack you. Just sayin'." She winked.

"Is she the coolest cousin ever or what?!" Lola beamed.

"Grrrr. I'm going inside. No point in socializing with the enemy." With that, Terry was gone behind the chocolate door, the handle of which had been eaten off by Lola prior.

"He ain't used to family gatherings, I take it?"

"Reunions have always been kinda tense for us." Lola answered. "We either go to Nightmare Land and meet our jillion Nightmare relatives, and it's always so loud and screamy that he just wants to go home. As for Dad's family, they always kept talking about his missing sister, so it was pretty…pretty upsetting, pretty much."

"Sigh… poor guy. No wonder he feels so uncomfortable here. Damn Hisoka's fault…" Sasha glared in spite before sending another chip to be grinded into crumbs.

"Hey, you feel like coming to that dinner thing at the castle?"

"Ugh, hate to say it, but I can't. Gonna be raiding salt on Secco for the next two days. But I'll try to be back to you squirts as soon as I can!"

Terry returned to the guest room, where there was a Jell-O bed made for Lola and one for him. He plopped himself onto the bouncy red substance and lay his head in the marshmallow pillow. He heard a pair of footsteps walk in and set something on the nightstand. "Was it too cold for you? Hm hm, I made you some cocoa." Aunt Lala said with a kind smile.

"Take it back, I'm going to sleep."

"I know you're technically in enemy territory, but you'd best behave when we go to meet Grandma. We are still family, after all."

"Half the operatives I know are related to villains, and they barely think of them as family. I know you're planning something."

"Just because we're on opposing sides, I don't see why we couldn't be friends. But I'll give you time to get used to us." She began to leave. "If you feel like cocoa, make sure to drink it soon. It'll cool down quickly in this weather." Her forehead eye winked as she closed the door, leaving her nephew in the dark.

Terry rolled over to stare at the steaming cup. Its smell was very alluring, and its steam made his eyes tired.

Outside Sweetopia's atmosphere; two days later

Sector LN was steadily approaching the planet in their Stanship. Diana had turned into a mouse and was hiding in Hannah's pocket, all the girls feeling nervous as they neared the candy-coated blockade. Their hearts raced as one of the ships flew over and peered into their window with its face. "Hey, you're not one of our ships—blockade vessel~"

"We have invitations from Queen Sherry herself." Akko stated, the eight raising their envelopes.

"Yeah, I can feel her soul-blockade vessel~" Apparently, the ship couldn't resist singing its name. "I guess you can pass then-vessel~" With that, the fleet opened a gap, allowing the witches to sail to Sweetopia with no hassle.

"All those ships must have been given life by Sherry's mysterious power." Lotte observed. "But what kind of power is it?"

The witches landed the Stanship in a field outside Whole Cake Capital. The buildings were all designed like cakes, and they looked so real that Akko decided to bite off a chunk of the wall. "Euck. This cake tastes like it went stale a long time ago."

"Akko, don't just aimlessly eat things!" Diana Mouse shouted.

"Or at least not without the proper Taste Spell." Jasminka said, casting a spell on the wall and ripping off another chunk to eat it. "Mmmmm. Banana-flavored."

"So, what's the plan, anyway?" Amanda asked. "How do we get in the castle?"

"We can always go knock on the front door." Lotte answered earnestly.

"I know I'm supposed to be the spy, but I agree with Lotte." Akko replied. "We don't want to make her think we have any ill intent."

"I wish I could join you inside the castle," Diana said, "but I cannot risk being discovered by her guards. We will collect information from the townspeople. But if you can get inside… please be careful, Akko."

"No worries, Diana!"

The witches crossed the candlelit bridge to Whole Cake Chateau, approaching the castle gates. Two Shy Guys dressed like chess pieces were guarding the gate. "My name is Atsuko Kagari. I was asked by Her Majesty to host a magic show at her party, so I would like to speak to her."

"The queen is having dinner with important guests tonight. We cannot allow anyone to disrupt the-"

"KINDER…JOYYYYYYY!" The queen herself burst out of a high floor of the castle and crashed on the bridge, her eyes spinning insanely. "LET'S DIG IN, FRIEEEEENDS!"

"Prometheus, I told you not to turn on PBS Kids!" Zeus yelled as they flew after her.

"But Magic School Bus was on; the one where they fly to the sun!"

"WO-O-O-O-O-OH! WO-O-O-O-O-OH!" Great Grandma charged into town and ripped off the roof of the Sweet Bank. "Giiiiive meeeee KINDER EEEEEEEGGS!"

The frightened Goblin bankers exchanged glances and pushed a button. A cannon emerged from behind the bank, locked onto Sherry, and fired chocolate Kinder Eggs like bullets into her gawking mouth. She compressed all the chocolate in her mouth and began chewing. "Mmmmnnn… Unborn Kinder Birds… a joy for my mouth. Ma ma maaaaaa…"

"Your Majesty! Queen Sherry!" The Titan viewed to her left, curious at the sight of a kangaroo with reindeer horns. "What do you think a Christmas Kangaroo has in its pouch?!" Akko asked. "A baby reindeer? Some toys? The correct answer is…"

"Pikachu." Sucy peeped out of her pouch in a Pikachu form.

"Didn't see that comin', did ya?!"

A familiar silence resulted from this trick. "…Is she really serious?" Amanda asked.

"HAAAAA HA HAH!" The queen laughed out chocolate drops. "A reindeeroo giving birth to a Pikachu! Haha that's PRICELESS!"

Akko poofed back to normal and greeted perkily, "Hello, Your Majesty! I wanted to talk to you about something, but the guards wouldn't let us in."

"Oh, they can suck on toothpaste. I'll carry you in myself, my dear!"

"JUST LIKE THAT?!" screamed everyone.

"You can't be serious, Your Majesty!" Goomnut shouted, floating by her on a Lakitu cloud. "Whatever reason you have for liking this girl," the queen rolled her eyes, "you do realize they are Kids Next Do-" She smacked the Goomba across town.

"Don't mind him. Come, to the castle! The younglings need someone to play with, anyway."

Whole Cake Chateau

As Sector LN expected, almost everything in the castle, from halls to windows to furniture, was giant sized. Akko had the honor of riding Zeus, the witch hugging the fluffy cloud with a sweet smile, while the other five witches followed the Titan on foot. "I heard it was possible to bake a cake so big, you could live in it, but I've never seen it for myself." Lotte thought aloud.

"It was prophesized that if I ever were revived, I would be a Titan as I was in the old days." Sherry replied. "My crewmen forged this body from the corpses of Titans that escaped from Underworld Prison three years ago, fixed with the Sweet DNA from my descendants. Now then… here is the Kiddie Corn Playground!" The queen pushed open a giant door and led them inside.

This joyful, colorful room contained a giant playground with balls and toys, with kids of various sizes and races playing happily. "GRANDMA'S BAAAACK!" The kids happily scampered over.

"Hey Gramma, who're the big kids?" asked a chubby Fishboy with an angry expression, indicating the witches. His name was Corlan. A little fairy girl in a pink dress stood in his hand.

"Are they our babysitters-soup?" asked a 6-year-old Twili girl with pink hair and swirly noodle designs on her shadow body. Her glowing yellow eyes complimented her cute smile. Her name was Soup.

"These lovely witches come from Avalar, and they'll be your playmates today. Have fun with them, dearies!" The queen exited the room with Akko, sealing the door.

"Did she mean that in a good way or a bad way?" Amanda asked.

"Move aside, brats!" demanded a whiny voice. "I'M the only babysitter around here!"

The kids opened a path between them as a blue goblin boy with a yellow shirt marched out, accompanied by a black-haired Russian girl and a Mobian puppy in a purple jester's outfit. "Now presenting the great Emperor Pilaf!" the dog exclaimed. "Heir to the Linlin Throne!"

"Oh, he's a goblin!" Lotte recognized. "Like the ones we have at Luna Nova."

"Heir to the throne?" Amanda cocked a brow. "What the frick is he on about?"

"It means that when Grandma dies, I'LL inherit the throne!" Pilaf proclaimed.

"So, are all of you Queen Sherry's grandchildren, too?" Jasminka asked. "Hello, little ones. My name is Jasminka, and I'm your cousin! Would you like a chip?" She offered one of her Fuwas.

"Who you calling little ones?" asked a fat, giant Glomourian boy, named Glonnorobolomus (Glonno).

"Silly, she just means she's older than us!" replied a same-sized, blue-haired Harnitan girl, whose name was Silla.

"I the talleth! I the talleth!" yelled a 3-year-old Legoan boy from atop a tower of letter blocks. His name was Jonny.

"I bets they can't catch me!" yelled a magenta-haired robot girl, using rockets in her ankles to boost around the room. Her name was Sarborg.

"Don't get the wrong idea." Pilaf replied. "Not all of us are related. We're the children of some of Grandma's crewmen, and this castle acts as our daycare. Of course, this place also serves as a training dojo! And I, the great Pilaf, am their personal trainer!"

"Even though they always kick our butts." the dog replied.

"QUIET, SHU!"

"And what about you?" Amanda asked with a raised brow. "Are you part of Grandma's crew?"

"Of course I am! I work for the Dinner Division as a master thief."

"We only rob small towns, though." the girl noted.

"I'm taking away your rations for tonight, Mai."

"You're seriously supposed to be the heir?" Amanda asked with a wry smile. "You look like you can barely count to 10, let alone run a planet. Like, how well do you even know your own crewmen?"

You're really gonna bait information out of him that way? Sucy thought.

"I know my crewmen VERY well, thank you for asking!"

"Yeah? Well, prove it."

"Not so fast. Since you have the gall to doubt me, let's play a little game: if you can defeat my classmates—I mean, my students here, then I will share with you my knowledge."

"Oh, we couldn't do that." Lotte replied, blushing sheepishly. "You're all so much younger than us, it wouldn't be fair."

"That problem can be easily fixed! Have a taste of my AGE CIRCLE!" Pilaf cupped his hands together and expanded a white, see-through energy bubble, encasing the five witches.

"WAH!" Amanda yelped, shrinking down.

"AAAH!" Lotte screamed.

"Huh?" Jasminka said.

"Uhh?" Constanze grunted. Sucy, meanwhile, remained stoic as their bodies were reduced to child size and their very clothes transformed.

Constanze was now wearing a pink dress and pigtails, and was still shorter than her friends. Amanda had on high-heel sandals and a silver dress, Lotte wore a green dress with no glasses, Sucy had on a black witch robe, and Jasminka had a sky-blue sleeveless shirt and blue shorts while her belly stuck out. "Hey! This is my dress from when I was five!" Lotte yelled in a high voice.

"Mother f***! We're kids again!" Amanda yelled.

"I was given Dr. Clown's Back-Back Fruit!" Pilaf explained. "I can reduce your ages by however number I please, and it even transforms your clothes to look like your old ones. But now that age is no longer an issue, let's get down to tactics: BEAT THEM UP, KIDS!"

"Get them, Spoon-soup!" Soup unleashed her shadow, Spoon, to start kicking Lotte from multiple angles.

"The big'un smells yummy!" Corlan ran at Jasminka with malice.

"I'll sprinkle her for you!" declared the fairy, Nati.

"I'll smash the red one!" Glonno declared.

"Cannons, shoot 'em!" Jonny activated block cannons on his block tower.

"Yep, this sure takes me back." Sucy said tonelessly, two of her front sharp teeth missing.

"Alright, you little brats! BRING IT ON!" exclaimed Amanda, kicking off her uncomfortable shoes.

Throne Room

As Akko stood before the Titan queen in the throne room, Her Majesty dug her hand into a bowl of sentient cinnamon rolls, melting with vanilla icing, and crushed them in her mouth. "Tonight, I am scheduled to have dinner with three arranged couples and their families, among them your friend, Diana. Of course, Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner mean nothing to me. The only time for me is Dessert, and that's been the same even during my stay in the Spirit World."

"The… Spirit World?" Akko asked curiously.

"You know, the place mortals go when they die."

"Forgive me, Your Majesty, but according to the KND's records and Avalar's history… well, it didn't sound like you would be allowed into Spirit World… theoretically."

"Well, I guess your history is garbage, then. I was such a good little soul that the Firstborn, Mew personally granted me permission to the Spirit World himself. He even gave back my psychicbending!"

That's very interesting… Akko could hardly believe such a 'dangerous' person was granted such a privilege.

"So, what did you need to talk to me about? Come to give me a little preview?"

"Oh, I would love to, but that would ruin the surprise, hehe!" Akko grinned.

The surprise attack, no doubt. Goomnut thought, his body bandaged.

"Actually, I wanted to tell you—about the show… Well, in order to give you the best performance possible, I'll need my whole team. And that includes Diana. So… is there any chance I could take Diana home with me to make a plan?"

"You're an idiot if you think we'll fall for tha-" Goomnut rebutted.

"I don't see why not!" Sherry beamed. "As soon as dinner's over, she can go back with you. Do whatever it takes to make the Fairy Sisters jealous!"

"Oh, thank you, Your Majesty!"

"With that said, of course… I expect your performance to be absolutely CAPTIVATING!" Pink flames brimmed around Her Highness, enveloping Akko in a terrifying aura. "Because if it isn't, with the exceptions of Diana and Jasminka, I'll have you all beheaded and mail your heads to the Fairy Sisters, with an angrily scrawled note that says, 'THIS WAS YOUR FAULT!'"

"Hehehe, no need to worry about that!" Akko waved her hands in panic, sweating rapidly. "I'm going to make a show you'll never forget, you'll see!"

They're so obviously going to pull something at the party. Goomnut furrowed his eyes. The question is, what is it? Furthermore, why is Her Majesty buying into it? Does she already have a counterplan?

"But could I ask you something else, Your Majesty? To be honest, I've never really seen a Fairy Sisters show myself. I'm curious… what was it like?"

The queen reached for a giant blue candycane and began to lick it dry. "Hmmmmnnnnn… that's a good question. It was such a long time ago… hrrrmm… I GUESS I DON'T REMEMBER! MA MA MA MA!"

"Uck-!" Akko's jaw dropped. "You…You don't?"

"Though I remember there was a lot of color and flashy lights… oh, and it made me feel so wonderful just by watching it. Like all my woes just melted away."

"I heard you were born around one of Malladus's eras. That must've been a rough life, huh?"

"It was horrible at first… Those wretched demons captured me and injected me with drugs. But the next thing I remember, I was holding my brother in my hands, and everyone around me was smaller. But we played so many games and ate so many sweets…" Smiling from pleasant memories, she brushed her tongue across the candycane. "And they baked me an unbelievable cake… but after that, they were all gone. My brother, Demtia, and all the others…"

"I'm sorry to hear that…"

"Your Majesty, the guests have arrived." The PA spoke. "Should we begin setting up the table?"

"Yes, go ahead. Goomnut, see to our guests."

"Urgh… Yes, Your Majesty." The Goomba begrudgingly exited the room, sparing one last suspicious glance at Akko.

Landing Platform

"Well, it seems our guests are arriving." Lala said as three tart ships were making land on the platform. Mushroom Toads were stepping off the first craft, leading a cute, young couple: Princess Éclair, a girl with brownish-blonde hair with a chocolate dress, crown, and waffle braid, and Vick Chestnut, a mustached man with a chocolate shirt, hair, cape, gold pants, and a chestnut crown. "Vick is Minister Goomnut's half-human son. Éclair is Princess of Mushroom's Waffle Kingdom, so you can guess why Grandma wants it part of her empire."

Some Hylian pirates were leading a family of three off the 2nd ship: Daryl Cavendish, a woman with a purple gown and blonde hair with green highlights, and her identical twin daughters, Maril and Merrill. "That's the Cavendish Family. Their cousin is marrying Jaune Pringle. Heard they fund a magic school on Avalar. …And THAT must be…"

Bokoblin pirates led a skeleton with a spider-web tuxedo off the last ship. "Jack Skellington!" Lala joyfully ran up to embrace her groom-to-be in a hug. "It's me, your lovely bride!"

"SOUL ROBBER!" Jack WHIPPED the floor before Lala, scaring her back. "Let me make this clear," the Pumpkin King said with furrowed sockets, "I don't care for you or ANY of these pirates. I'm only here because your queen threatened Sally. Hm?" Jack cocked a brow at seeing Virginia and her family behind her. "Strange. What would you four be doing here?"

"Hi, Jack." Bartie greeted awkwardly. "This is Lala, my sister."

"COOL!" Lola beamed. "That means Uncle Jack is gonna marry Aunt Lala! Now he's really gonna be part of our family!"

"We have an hour before the dinner is ready." Lala mentioned. "Shall we go wash up?"

"That won't be necessary for me." Jack stated, walking past them. "As soon as I've finished eating, I'm boarding the next ship out of here."

"Well, now I see why you shouldn't see the groom before the wedding."

Dining Room; an hour later

A dining room for a giant queen would logically require a giant table, and several smaller tables were placed on it in-between the giant drinks and pastries. Daryl and her daughters were present, looking suspiciously at "Diana" and her fiancé, the orange-haired Mustachio, Jaune Pringle. So, that's the person masquerading as my niece. I admit, her disguise is impressive… but what is she even planning?

"Uck, look at all these vomitrocious sweets." Roger the Alien scoffed. "I'm gonna get, like, SO fat and my perfect figure will be ruined!"

"Ho ho, calm-a down, Diana." Jaune put a gentle hand over 'hers.' "You-a get so sweaty when you're agitated."

"I get sweaty because I love you, my sexy Pringle." Her eyes glowing pink, "Diana" embraced Jaune in a loving, sensual kiss, leaving the three Cavendishes in utter disgust.

She doesn't behave like Diana at all! At this rate, the Cavendish name will be ruined!

"What's taking so long, anyway?" Terry asked.

"Ghhhhrrrrr!" Wanting to know the answer himself, an angry Goomnut hopped off the table and marched to the throne room.

Throne Room

"No, I'm totally serious!" Akko exclaimed, munching a large blueberry muffin. "A WHOLE mountain made of poop! We went there on a mission and it was the absolute WORST thing! It got all up in my shoes and it was awful!"

"I can't believe Avalar would have a place like that!" Sherry replied. "It's so disgusting, I can't possibly eat again!" …Regardless, she dug her hand into a bowl of boiled golden goose eggs and savored their godly taste.

"For some reason, Gruntilda purchased the territory, and I have no idea why. Some people just like wasting money."

"YOUR MAJESTYYYYYY!" Goomnut charged into the chamber with furious eyes. "YOUR MAJESTY, dinner has been ready for over 10 minutes! We're WAITING for you!"

"Silence, Goomnut, I'll be down in a moment!" The queen stated as she stomped under a large faucet, turning it on as jelly and peanut butter poured into her throat.

"So, Your Majesty, if they made candy with Fairy Wrappers and it tasted really awful, would you still buy it?"

"Oh, absolutely!" Sherry proclaimed, whipping around as jam spilled from her mouth. "Nothing tastes too terrible for me! Ma ma ma!"

"I wish my tastebuds were as strong as yours! They made Chariot sweets back in the day, and they tasted awful! But I still made my parents buy 'em!"

"But if I had one bias, it would be against vegetables. Anything with vegetables feels sickening."

"I can relate to that. Luna Nova gives us nothing but potatoes for lunch, and I never have money to buy anything else."

"Well, I'll just have Sasha demolish the whole lot of potatoes then! Ma ma ma!"

"Hahahaha! That would be sweet if you could do that!"

Mouth agape, Goomnut looked back and forth between them, astonished how they were carrying on like life-long friends. He glanced up at Zeus and Prometheus, who gave querying looks saying how even they were baffled. "Grrrrrrrr YOUR MAJESTY, OUR GUESTS ARE WAITING! ! Throw that little witch out the window and come join us!"

"Sigh… well, I can't possibly pass up Tonio's cooking. Join us, Akko!"

"Okay!"

"WHY IS SHE GETTING THE ROYAL TREATMENT?!" Goomnut nearly melted with anger.

In the dining room, the guests watched as the colossal doors opened, the room quaking as the Queen of Sweetopia finally stomped in. "Ma ma maaaaa! I'm so delighted all my future families-in-law could make it. By the way, an additional guest will be joining us this evening."

"HEY, it's Diana's family!" Akko called from Sherry's shoulder. "Yoohoo! Remember me, I'm Akko!"

"What the heck is SHE doing here?!" Maril hissed, the family internally panicking.

"This girl is Atsuko Kagari! She and her little team will be performing a magic show at my party! Oh, it's going to be WONDERFUL!"

"It sure will! OOOO, look at the size of that pie!" Akko dove into a pool-sized blackberry pie.

"I'm a pie~ I'm a pie~ I'm a pie~ I'm a pie~ I'm a duuuhhh…" The sentient pie felt mushy in the brain as Akko devoured his insides.

"Who in their right mind would invite HER to dinner?!" Merrill whispered.

"My thoughts exactly…" Goomnut replied.

The queen took her seat and raised a giant smoothie. "So, let's talk business." And she took a sip.

"Right." Jack agreed. "First order of business, it's pointless to try and use me to take over Nightmare Land. My father will never welcome your rule and he will banish you all."

"My sources say that your father is in a coma at the moment, along with his very special little infant."

"He will awaken, you can be sure of that."

"Even if he does, I hear that the gods are no longer as powerful as they once were. Factor in the fact they can't use full power on mortals, my spirit crewmen can make quick work of them. Face it, Skellington, the Big Mom Pirates will own Nightmare Enterprises, and we will decide who we sell to."

"Now Grandma, no need to pressure him." Lala said, leaning on Jack's shoulder. "Listen, how about we have a talk after dinner, just the two of us?"

"I won't buy into your tricks."

"Hmmmmph…" Lala's cheeks puffed.

"Then there is you, Princess Éclair." Sherry faced the Waffle Princess. "All I desire is the wheat grown in your Waffle Fields, grown with the most quality Golden Syrup to produce some of the greatest pancakes known to mankind!" Her tongue drooled from the very thought of it. "And in return, we can guarantee protection from all other rogue Candy Pirates that lust after your luscious kingdom."

"That sounds pretty fair to me." Éclair smiled sweetly. "I admit I was a bit frightened about this, but Vick has been very kind to me."

"Well, if I am to be married, I want to at least live happily with my bride-to-be." The chestnut-clad human replied.

What's interesting is that Vick hasn't once used the Sweet Gene to brainwash Éclair. Their love actually seems genuine. Goomnut thought.

"You know, Mushroom really is an amazing world." Sherry reflected as she dipped giant muffins into a huge pot of honey, and savoring the heavenly taste. "My pirates robbed their world for generations and ravaged their food. So many amazing chefs and strong fighters. Sigh… I wanted to marry one of my children to Princess Peach 10 years ago, but Bowser's troops kept stopping them. When I came back to life, I finally decided to go down to his castle and punish him myself…"

"AAAGH!" The Koopa King socked Queen Sherry in the jaw with a Haki punch. Prometheus lunged at him with massive flames, but Bowser blew violet fire against him. "AAAAH! TOO HOT, TOO HOT!" The sun fled.

Zeus struck lightning, but Bowser was unaffected as he leapt above Sherry and Ground Pounded her. He then picked the battered queen up by the neck. "Now listen, you… Peach is MY hoe! If I ever see your troops try to kidnap her again, I'm gonna fly to your planet and burn everything to a CRISP!"

"Yeah, that Bowser guy's a real ass." Akko remarked while chewing a banana sponge cake, which was very squishy and lovely on the tongue. "You know we actually invaded his castle not too long ago."

"HAAAH! You actually went up against that thing?!"

"Well, we didn't actually fight him, but we mowed down a lot of his troops!"

"Sure you did, sweetheart." Goomnut remarked.

"Hey, I could totally take down Bowser if I put my mind to it! Heck, I went toe-to-toe with Sheila Frantic."

Zeus RUMBLED with lightning, Akko's heart jumping from the sudden sound. "You don't mean Sheila Frantic, the Raccoon Pirate who killed my former heir, Charlotte, did you?…" Sherry asked, her eyes brimming with fury.

Akko was so scared that her soul was literally wiggling out of her body. "A-And I told her, th-the next time I saw her, I-I-I would cut off her neck and put her insides on my sandwich, hehe. . ."

"MA MA MA!" Joy returned to Her Highness's heart. "You and I see eye-to-eye, Miss Kagari!"

"We sure do, hehehehehehe. . ." Her soul slowly returned to her body.

"Now, on to the Cavendish Family." Sherry continued. "As you know, I plan to use Luna Nova to breed a new generation of witches, ones that will not only be of great service to the Linlin Pirates, but witches that can put a smile on my face like little Akko here!" The little witch grinned at the praise, while the Cavendishes looked with scorn. "However, I plan to eventually spread my empire to the kingdom of Appleton. Their namesake doesn't fail them, for their apples are one of a kind. Yes, I think we can all be great friends, don't you think?"

"Perhaps, Your Majesty," Daryl replied, "but without an official Head of Cavendish, our political power is very limited. We cannot hold the ceremony for another few years, unfortunately."

"So, time is an issue, is it?" Sherry smirked. "Well, I'm sure we can work around that somehow."

"Speaking of which, don't you have anything more appetizing?" Merrill asked. "Your kind may be able to live off of junk food, but we have our bodies to worry about!"

"Cough, Merrill, please." Daryl mumbled.

"My cousin is like a total slut." Roger whispered to Jaune.

"Yes, you non-Sweetians have more strict diets, don't you?" Sherry frowned with disinterest. "Well, do we have a surprise for you."

"DINNER… IS SERVED!" A squad of Volbonan chefs hopped in, led by a muscular human chef with smooth brown hair and alluring blue eyes. The chef climbed onto the table as the Volbonans placed plates of various foods before the guests. "For Signore Terry, a Strawberry Snow Bunny." Terry was given a pink bunny made of snow. "For La Padrona Kagari, a glass of Sparkle Water from Mushroom's Bubblaine."

"Everyone, meet Antonio Trussardi, the Traveling Chef." Queen Sherry announced. "I hired him the moment his incredible tastes reached my tongue. Have a bite and watch as your hearts melt from his recipe!"

"Yep, it's definitely poison." Lola remarked.

"MAMA MIA!" Jaune Pringle cried as his body started bending in all sorts of angles. "The soup! What-a was in the SOUP?!"

"He poisoned her own grandson?!"

"It was Rubber Noodle Soup, created from edible rubber ingredients from Bungeeland." Tonio explained. "Mister Pringle had a mild back pain. His limbs will straighten themselves out in a few minutes."

"…" Curious, Terry took a bite of his Snow Bunny. "!!" As if on instinct, Terry ate up the entire thing, it was too delicious. "WAAAAH…!" Afterwards, his skin turned to frost and he couldn't move.

"TERRY!" his family panicked.

"Mr. Terry's head was throbbing and had a slightly high blood pressure. He will unfreeze in a couple of minutes."

"What are you, some kind of wizard?!" Bartie exclaimed.

"No, Signore!" Tonio chortled. "I am not a wizard, nor a bender, nor a metahuman. However, I will confess to having exceptional Observation Haki. I can detect any ailments that may be troubling my customers and work to make a necessary meal to ensure them a pleasant day. Mind you, I cannot cure major sicknesses or diseases."

"WAAAAH!" Daryl screamed, clutching strands of hair. "Then why is my HAIR falling out?!"

"Mobian banana pie!" Tonio smiled assuringly. "It will make you feel young again and rid your head of grey hairs, replacing them with hair that is bound to stay young for four more decades!"

"Okay, but what's with this shiny water?" Akko asked, taking a drink. "Oh God, it's amazing!" She drunk the whole glass. "AAAAH!" An incredible bubbling was felt in her belly, which began to morph and contract.

"I fixed the Sparkle Water with dietary supplements. By consuming all these sweets, your body had become slightly bloated, but this will rectify that. …Of course, you will have to drop the waste somewhere."

"Y-Y-Your Majesty, where's the bathroom?!" Akko panicked.

"Three doors down that hallway." Sherry pointed.

"THANK YOU!" Akko ran to the bathroom as fast as possible and slammed the door. She quickly opened one of the stalls… and found a singing toilet.

"Toilet~ Toilet~ Toilet~ Toilet~"

The face was smiling and eyes half-closed, as though it felt no greater joy than what it was designed to do. "Toilet~ Toilet~ Toilet~ Toilet~…" Akko began to sniffle and cry in despair. Indeed, there was no pleasant way around this.

"As you can see, Antonio's reputation precedes him." said the queen. "His recipes are unlike any other you'll ever taste. And that's why I've commissioned him for a very special job: he will have the honor of baking the Linlin Family's Royal Cake! Already, we recovered the Eight Sugary Wonders, and he is going to bake them into a cake more amazing than ALL generations before it! OOOOHHH, its taste is going to feel so GLORIOUS!"

"Birthday cake! Birthday cake! I wonder how it tastes, the birthday cake~"

If she eats that cake, she'll be unstoppable. Terry thought. "Erk…nngh…GUH!" The ice finally cracked and he could move again. "Holy crap, that Snow Bunny was amazing."

"Grazie." Tonio bowed. "You may look forward to even more wonderful delicacies at the Tea Party."

"Raaaaaahhhh!" The room shook slightly as they heard screaming from down the hall.

"My, it sounds like the children are quite riled up." Sherry smirked. "They must be welcoming new playmates."

Kiddie Corn Room

"ROOAAR!" Corlan bit Amanda in the leg, but she punched him off with a flaming fist. Sucy was chasing Nati and spraying gas at her, but she was caught in a Shadow Possession by Soup, who started forcing Sucy to dance and punch herself. Sarborg boosted circles around Jasminka before kicking the witch in the stomach and flying her into a wall.

"Dammit!" Amanda cursed. "My firebending is still as strong as ever, but it's hard to move with this puny body!"

"Ow!" Sucy yelped, forced to scratch her own cheek. "Akko seriously owes us after this…"