The Cookout

(Trigger warning. This chapter contains the subject of eating disorders.)He was a nervous wreck. He was going to see her after three months. So much had happened that he wanted to share with her. Three weeks earlier, he got a call from the Newcastle Eagles. They are the best team in the British Basketball League. He was due to arrive in Tyne, England, in two days. His truck was already packed full and ready to go. He was supposed to report yesterday, but by some miracle, his manager, Oliver Kress, convinced them to allow him to show up a couple of days late so he could tie up loose ends. He still couldn't believe he had a manager. He hadn't told anyone about the call, not even the other Musketeers. He was going to break the news today. He wouldn't be back till next June. The Season runs from mid-September to the middle of May. He was already missing home, and he had yet to leave.How was he going to feel when he saw her? Should he say hello? Hug her? If she would even let him near her. Should he pull her aside and finally kiss her? He was sweating despite the air conditioning in the truck being on full blast. His stomach had been in knots for what felt like the entire summer. He couldn't concentrate. He would stop while practicing and stare into space. He was only making 75% of his free throws. He needed to get it together. Coach MacLeod and Oliver went to bat for him and convinced Paul Black and Ken Nottage, the team's owner, to give him 1000 euros over the average top pay. It wasn't near NBA money, but he wants to get his foot in the door. Rumors were swirling that the point guard on the Texas Drillers and Oklahoma Stallions would retire by next summer. Bodhi wanted the job. But so did every other point guard on the planet with dreams of the NBA. He ran his fingers through his hair. He was planning on cutting it short, but the P.R. manager for the team told him to hold off. She said it looked sexy and would make for better press with the female fans. They were trying hard to pull in a larger fanbase, and he was going to help with the female demographic. He had put on ten more pounds of muscle over the summer to help the cause. He was now 6 foot, 3 inches and 238 pounds. He pulled into the drive. An enormous number of cars were in the drive and on the side lawn. Charlotte must be losing her shit. He ran his hands over his face. He felt like he was going to vomit. He pulled his hair back into his signature ponytail, exposing his freshly shaved sides. He took a deep breath and got out of the truck into the Tennessee heat. It was a hot and humid day, a perfect day for a swim. Holden met him in the driveway by the back fence. He had asked him to let him know when he was close. He needed to talk to him before he went to enjoy the festivities. He knew it had to be about Perri."Hey, man." They did their handshake they have done since they were kids. "Thanks for coming. Umm, I just wanted to talk to you real quick.""Let me guess, Perri doesn't want to see me and wants me nowhere near her."Holden's face fell."I'm right, aren't I?" Bodhi asked, shoving his hands into his pockets."It's not exactly that.""What else could it possibly be?""She's had a rough summer. Her depression has come back. She's..." He paused. "She's sick, Bodhi. She doesn't want you to see her.""What? Sick how? Does it have to do with what she was in the hospital?""It kind of has to do with the hospital stays.""Well, why would she not want me to see her?" He tried looking around him. "I want to see her. I need to see her," he said, stepping forward.Holden stepped in front of him, trying to stop him. It was no use. Bodhi was much larger than Holden now. He pushed his way past him."Bodhi, wait!" He followed him through the gate, trying to stop him. He grabbed him by the shoulder.Bodhi shook his hand off his shoulder. He made the turn around the corner of the house, and when he saw her, he stopped dead in his tracks. She looked like a shell. She was gaunt, and her cheeks were slightly sunk in. Even though it was over 90 degrees out, she was in his sweatshirt and a pair of sweatpants. She was sitting at the patio table, legs tucked underneath her. She looked like a small child in a big chair. He watched her pick up a water bottle, her hand trembling, and took a small sip. He couldn't believe he was looking at his Periwinkle. A lump started to form in her throat.Holden stood beside him, looking at her. "She gets cold due to the absence of body fat. She's scheduled to go to a clinic for inpatient care.""What did she do to herself?" He turned to face Holden. "Is this because of me? Did I do this to her?" Bodhi asked, tears in his eyes.Holden scratched his neck, trying to think of an answer that wouldn't completely destroy his friend. "I don't know. She won't talk about it with any of us. She's shut down. Ashley is the only person that she will talk to, and Ashley can't talk about it due to Bestie Bestie Privilege.""She didn't want me to see her because she looks like she does?""Like I said, it's not because of what you think," Holden said.He watched as Ashley took the book out of her hands. She took Perri's hands in hers and was talking to her. Perri looked at the pool and shook her head. A minute later, she stood up and took her favorite sweatshirt off. It looked like a tent on her. Bodhi saw her body. Her collarbone was protruding. It looked like it was going to poke right through her skin. Her arms were small. Her breasts were smaller, maybe by a cup size. Her ribs were prominent, and her stomach was concave. She literally looked like someone who hadn't eaten in months. When she took her sweatpants off, it was no better. Her legs looked like twigs, and the space between them was exaggerated. Her hip bones were the only thing holding up the bottoms of the white bathing suit. A little white bathing suit. He smiled softly. He felt the tears creep in. God, Periwinkle, what did you do to yourself? You're still the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, even if there isn't much left of you. He wanted to run to her and take her in his arms. How am I supposed to go over the pond knowing she's sick? What if she has another heart attack, and I never get to see her again? Now I understand the fainting and why she had the heart attack. He watched as she and Ashley walked to the pool. The ass he loved so much was barely there. Her shoulder blades stuck out like broken wings. She held onto Ashley's arm. He Could tell she was weak and thought he saw her tremble. "Holden. Why didn't you tell me?" "She didn't want you to think it was because of you. She asked me not to.""You said she's going to get help?" His voice cracked as he talked.Holden saw the tear roll down his cheek. He took him by the shoulders. "She's going to be alright. She told me she wants to get better. So that's a good start. She has to want it. No matter how much we want it for her. But...""But what?" Bodhi didn't take his eyes off her. "She's going in voluntarily, and she's an adult, so legally, she can sign herself out at any time.""I can't leave her. Not like this.""Bodhi, you have to go back to school. You're only four hours away, and you can come to visit. I'm sure my parents would let you stay here.""Holden, I'm leaving for England in two days. I got signed by the Newcastle Eagles, and I won't be back until June.""Holy Shit! Bodhi, that's fantastic news! Why didn't you tell us?" Holden asked, hugging him. "I'm going to miss you, man. That's a long time to go without my favorite Musketeer. Don't tell the guys I said that.""I wanted to wait till the deal was finalized to tell everyone. Then, Perri started having all these problems. It never seemed like the right time. And it's still not the right time. Please don't make a big deal." He kept his eyes on Persephone. "I don't feel much like celebrating or being the center of attention.""Come on, Bodhi! This is happy news. We can all use a little happy news."They watched Ashley walk down the steps into the pool with Perri. Perri sat on the bottom step. The water came up to her neck. She was trying to hide herself."We could all use a little distraction right about now." Holden put his hand back on Bodhi's shoulder. "She's going to be okay. I'll text you with updates even if she doesn't want me to.""I really fucked up," Bodhi said, running his hands down his face"BODHI! YOU'RE HERE! GET IN THIS POOL HOT STUFF!" Lewis shouted to him.He saw Perri's head snap up. She looked at him, and he saw the corners of her mouth lift slightly. She raised her hand in a small gesture of hello. It took every ounce of restraint in him not to run to her.🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️🏊‍♀️She was curled up in the chair, reading a book. Chicken Soup for the Soul. Her counselor encouraged her to read it. She would much rather be reading her textbooks, but she was also told she needed to focus on getting better, not obsessing over school.She wasn't sure when she would be able to start. She would be in the I.P. program for at least twelve weeks. Her joints ached, and her heart constantly pounded. She fainted a lot, and her hair was falling out. She slept a lot and ate very little. At 5 foot 5 inches and weighing 103 pounds, her BMI was 17. She was considerably underweight.Ashley took the book from her hands and put it on the table. She took her hands. "Come on, let's go swimming.""No. I don't want to. I'm cold." Perri's eyes were pleading for Ashley to drop the idea."I'm getting heat stroke just looking at you! Besides, Jake said it's like bath water. Come on, Perri. You bought that cute suit... which took us six hours and eight stores to find. Get it wet at least once," she begged."What if someone says something about the way I look?""Oh, that's easy; I'll punch them in the face. Plus, you know damn well no one is going to say something in front of Jake, Lewis, or Holden. You know that." She was pulling on her, trying to get her to stand up."Really? I'm pretty sure Annie will have something to say.""Annie's a bitch, but she's not that big of a bitch.""Last week, she told me to stop being so dramatic and just eat a fucking sandwich.""Alright, maybe she is that big of a bitch. If she says anything, I will punch her in the face... twice.""You are an awesome friend. Have I ever told you that?""Not enough," Ashley said with a smile. "Now, come on. Quick like a bunny!"She helped Persephone to her feet, then helped her take the sweatshirt off, exposing the body she had tried so hard to cover up. She wrapped her arms around her waist—not that she had much of one left. "Pants off. You're almost there."Perri slowly took off the sweats. Ashley held on to her to keep her stable."Let's go. Hold on if you need to."Perri hooked her elbow in the crook of Ashley's arm. They made their way to the pool. She and Ashley walked down the cement steps into the pool, where they both sat on the bottom step."See, just like Jake said, bath water.""Yeah, an ice bath," Perri mumbled, dropping her head and staring at her feet. She heard Jake yell out Bodhi's name. Her head snapped up, and she saw him. He looked like Michael Angelo's David, except David didn't wear pants. Bodhi was in a pair of white basketball shorts and no shirt. "Wow. Bodhi looks really good. I think he's more ripped than the last time I saw him. Are you sure you don't want to give him another chance? Cause if you don't, I call dibs."A small smile came over Perri's face."Wave or something. Don't just stare at him," Ashley said with a laugh.Perri put her hand up and waved. Bodhi patted Holden on the back and made his way over.🏀🏀🏀🏀🏀🏀🏀🏀🏀🏀🏀🏀🏀🏀🏀🏀🏀🏀🏀"Go. She wants to see you.""You sure?" Bodhi asked, sounding nervous."I'm sure she would love to meet a professional ball player," Holden smiled. "I'll grab you a beer. Now go get the girl. Just don't fuck up, or I'll be throwing some nuts on the grill."Bodhi patted him on the back. "Thanks, man, and noted.""He's coming over here. Do you want me to go?" Ashley asked."Please, no." She gripped Ashley's wrist.Bodhi sat on the side of the pool, sticking his feet in the water."Hi, Ash.""Hey Bodhi. Looking good. Special occasion?"He looked at Perri. He dodged the question. He wasn't ready to tell her yet."Hi, Periwinkle.""Hi, Bodhizafa," she gave him a shy smile. His chest tightened. She called me Bodhizafa. She has forgiven me. He smiled, and you heard panties dropping all around the world. They sat there saying nothing. Finally, Perri spoke."So, we should probably address the elephant in the room." She squeezed Ashley's hand. Ashley nodded her head.Perri took a deep breath. "So, I've lost a little weight since last I saw you.""Really? I didn't notice. I was too busy looking at the little white bikini you have on."She smiled. That's her Bodhizafa. "It took me forever to find one I liked.""Six hours and eight stores. That was a fucking adventure," Ashley said, rolling her eyes."I think it was worth it," Bodhi said. He had started to blush."I was hoping you would like it," she said shyly. Now, she was blushing.Ashley looked surprised. She couldn't believe Perri had the balls to say that. "I think you two should talk."Perri nodded at her. Ashley squeezed her hand and got out of the pool.They both said something at the same time."You first," he said.She climbed out of the pool and sat down beside him. "Hey." He gently bumped her shoulder."Hey, back." She did the same. "This reminds me of the day you gave me the necklace.""How so? Because we are sitting poolside with our feet in the water?""No. Because the butterflies in my stomach are just as intense now as they were back then." She looked down as she swished the water around with her feet.He smiled. "I gave you butterflies?""You've given me butterflies before I knew that feeling had a name.""Really?" Now he had them. He looked into her eyes. Although she had lost a lot of weight, her beautiful green eyes remained the same. "Music speaks when words fail.""What song is speaking for you?" she asked."Our song." "We have a song?" she asked."Of course we do, Periwinkle." She smiled. "I'm happy I didn't have to wait a hundred days before I saw you. Do you listen to it anymore?""Every day," she whispered."Me too." He took hold of her hand."I'm sorry, Bodhi. I shouldn't have ignored you. I know you were sincerely sorry. I know you're human and made a mistake. I was hurt. But the fact of the matter is we weren't together, and you had every right to be with... her. I just really liked you. I have since the day you found me crying, and you wiped away my tears with your towel."He scratched the back of his head. "Really?""Really." "The book.""The book?" she asked."The moment you gave me the book. That's when I knew I was in deep shit. I still have it, you know.""You do? Wow. It must be in pretty rough shape.""Yeah. The pages are falling out. I can almost recite it cover to cover, even though the cover is about to fall off. But it's still the best gift I ever received. From the most beautiful girl I had ever seen."She blushed and hung her head. He cupped the side of her face and turned her head to face. "I'm here without you, baby, but you're with me in my dreams. And tonight, girl, it's only you and me. Everything I know, and anywhere I go. It gets hard, but it won't take away my love. And when the last one falls. When it's all said and done. It gets hard, but it won't take away my love.," he sang quietly to her. He leaned in, their lips less than an inch apart. Their eyes locked. "Periwinkle, can I---""BODHI!" Jake yelled.He rolled his eyes. Why do I even have a cock if everyone is just going to block it?"Holden just told us, man. Holy shit! I'm friends with a professional basketball player! Congratulations," Lewis and Jake were making their way towards them. "He said you go to England in two days? Man. I always knew you were destined for greatness."He looked at Persephone. She looked like she was about to cry. "You're leaving?""Yeah. I signed with the Newcastle Eagles."She pulled her feet out of the water and hugged her legs. "Oh. I'm happy for you. They are lucky to have you.""I was going to tell you," he said. The pain in her face was killing him. "It just never seemed like the right time, and I wanted to do it in person, but you wouldn't see me.""But I just got you back. I wasted so much time being mad at you." A tear rolled slowly. He brushed it off with his thumb."Oh, Periwinkle.""Do you get to come back home at all?" He went pale. "I won't be able to until June."She swallowed hard. "June? That's so far away." She slowly stood up. "Congratulations. I don't feel very good all of a sudden. I am going to go lie down. If I don't come back out, I want you to know I will miss you."He stood up. He always towered over her, but now she was so small she looked like a child. "Please stay out here with me," he begged. "I want to spend as much time with you as possible.""I'm sorry, Bodhi. This illness takes a lot out of me. Holden and Ashley made me eat something earlier, and it's not sitting well." She motioned for him to bend down. He did, and she gently kissed his cheek. "Celebrate with your friends. You should be so proud of what you have accomplished. I am."He watched her walk slowly to the house. She looked back at him before she slid the door open and disappeared inside.📝📝📝📝📝📝📝📝📝📝📝📝📝📝📝📝📝📝📝📝A/N: If you or someone you know is struggling with an eating disorder, contact any of the following:Eating Disorder HOPE 866-932-1264ANAD Hotline 888-375-7767Eating Disorders Awareness Helpline 866-662-1235🎧IF I COULD TURN BACK TIME: CHER🎧