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Slan
SlanLv21yr
2024-01-03 14:38

None of this makes sense, I don't understand the MC's behavior, nor his actions, none of it makes sense, it's just poorly crafted wish fulfillment.Read it for yourself.

Liked by 35 people

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Replies8
EzioAuditore_1
EzioAuditore_1Author

I apologize for the lacking of story quality, but I myself admitted that I am not a good author. I just write what comes to mind and I apologize if my writing isn’t to your specifications I hope you have a nice day.

LevelHeaded_Guy
LevelHeaded_GuyLv4

nah this guy was yapping🙃everything makes sense and your also not leaving any plot holes.....1)Him making sure to break the window in the car to show that's how he "escaped"...2) Chesire blowing up the Building so that no one would ask what happened to the bodies of the people inside.

EzioAuditore_1:I apologize for the lacking of story quality, but I myself admitted that I am not a good author. I just write what comes to mind and I apologize if my writing isn’t to your specifications I hope you have a nice day.
Slan
SlanLv2

It is simply my point of view, I did not read all the chapters, because they are not even enjoyable, if you like reading this type of things, it is very much your taste. I recommend you read again friend, or simply read other people's fanfic and compare.

LevelHeaded_Guy:nah this guy was yapping🙃everything makes sense and your also not leaving any plot holes.....1)Him making sure to break the window in the car to show that's how he "escaped"...2) Chesire blowing up the Building so that no one would ask what happened to the bodies of the people inside.
GodOfDegenerates
GodOfDegeneratesLv4

Bud did not read the same story as the rest of us

Artem_5195
Artem_5195Lv2

Плохое начало нормально, просто учиться на ошибках и с каждой главой будет развиваться ваши навыки

EzioAuditore_1:I apologize for the lacking of story quality, but I myself admitted that I am not a good author. I just write what comes to mind and I apologize if my writing isn’t to your specifications I hope you have a nice day.
OkayVelvet
OkayVelvetLv3

Bad Start? Dang people like you got some crazy expectations on a fanfiction story of all things... Go write a story and show everyone how it's done then

Artem_5195:Плохое начало нормально, просто учиться на ошибках и с каждой главой будет развиваться ваши навыки
Artem_5195
Artem_5195Lv2

Where do you see that I am criticizing and saying that I don’t like the start or the beginning, I was just trying to encourage the author for his self-critical answer.

OkayVelvet:Bad Start? Dang people like you got some crazy expectations on a fanfiction story of all things... Go write a story and show everyone how it's done then
Netherios00Zaphire
Netherios00ZaphireLv4

i will take your meme buddy. I didn't stole since I ask nicely and like your comment

GodOfDegenerates:Bud did not read the same story as the rest of us
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Other Reviews
Casualreader
CasualreaderLv3

Good idea, poor execution. Pros: - The Gacha started nice, with competent but not overly powerful gains, giving him the power to survive mundane threats. - Attention to little details like how having taskmaster's aptitude and mimicry would change his balance and gait, revealing him as unordinary. Cons: - Started in Gotham again. It's a city that's suffering from a warlock's curse, not transmigration and reincarnation central. - The story lacks proper emotional expression, from both the MC and the other characters. It's only got sentences that states what they are feeling bluntly and adjectives set a tone that is never properly explored. - Plot points lack proper foreshadowing and build up. Like the league of shadows suddenly attacking the MC. It would be fine if there was a paragraph of events leading up to that point afterwards or may snippets, but no, the author just put in a note saying that the league was watching batman for a while. - Too many powerful entities are interacting with the MC, creating a dissonance with the setting. - The MC's personality is bland. He's got traits like being calm but that's it. No proper motivation beyond surviving to be found. But this is early on in the story, so this can change. These are just a few points and critics. The author can improve upon these, making it null. If the author decides to give high intellect to the MC, be aware of mundane plots and situations that this intelligence can help prevent, because judging from the current material, I highly doubt the author can write a proper genius MC.

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Zaeus07
Zaeus07Lv4
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