A Compelling Novel with Missed Opportunities in Story Development
The novel under review, set in a vividly imagined medieval world, presents a gripping storyline and well-developed characters that make for an overall enjoyable reading experience. However, it is not without its flaws. The story development takes an unfortunate turn at the end of the first volume, as pivotal decisions made by the author on behalf of the characters seem to lack coherence and emotional resonance.
One such decision involves the treatment of Rachel, a crucial character in the narrative. The choice to abandon her and label her as a monster, as dictated by the author, is not only heart-wrenching but also conflicts with the promise made to her and her father. This betrayal not only shatters Rachel's trust but also seems to be an unnecessary plot device that detracts from the emotional impact of the story.
An alternative path that the protagonist could have considered would have been to take Rachel with them when escaping from the clutches of the crown prince. This course of action might have prevented the devastating consequences that followed, such as Rachel losing one of her flower petals and a significant amount of life.
Additionally, the choice to betray Rachel has far-reaching implications, as it strains the relationship between two influential families and potentially the imperial family as well. The King might choose to side with Leriana's father, a close friend. This alliance is likely to start a feud with Rachel's father over the broken promise, further intensifying the conflict surrounding their families, which could lead to much bloodshed, as they control half the military of the empire.
While the novel's overall quality is commendable, the storyline at the end of the first volume, and subsequently all volumes thereafter, could have benefitted from more thoughtful development by the author. By exploring alternative paths for the characters and maintaining consistency in their actions, the narrative would have been more engaging and emotionally satisfying. Nonetheless, readers who appreciate intricate plotlines and rich character development will still find much to enjoy in this fascinating tale. The novel leaves us questioning the author's choices, but eager to see how the story unfolds in subsequent volumes.
Total score 3.4, because all criteria except story development are good.
Suggested Revision: A simple solution to address this issue could be to alter the protagonist's actions towards Rachel. Instead of explicitly calling her a monster, the protagonist could choose to leave without saying anything. As a result, the events surrounding the loss of Rachel's flower petal could unfold differently. For instance, Rachel might feel betrayed because the protagonist left without an explanation, or someone else could spread lies about the protagonist's reasons for leaving, leading to a more reasonable portrayal of the protagonist's actions. This adjustment could strengthen the emotional resonance of the story and maintain the protagonist's integrity.
