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Dick_Wizard
Dick_WizardLv41yr
2023-03-17 23:29

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Kyle_Kingsmaker
Kyle_KingsmakerAuthor

Thanks for the review! It really motivates me to do even better!

Other Reviews
BadDad_201
BadDad_201Lv14

This is one of the most unique and interesting Novels I’ve read. The power system is different and characters feel more than cardboard cutouts, and the story Also flows in a way that it doesn’t depend on cliches and plot devices. Unfortunately it’s almost as if the story is too unique. It has too much going on at one time that it becomes confusing, in the first 10 chapters you don’t know if it’s going to be a generic urban fantasy or a sci-fi drama. It overwhelms the reader with to many components of the story at the same time. I think the author focused too much on trying to be different that he/she bit off more than they can chew and it becomes confusing. For the first chapters of the story, it feels like there isn’t a plot and thing just happens; so as a reader and hard to follow the story. The reader isn’t allowed to infer what’s going on in the story and understand the emotions of the MC and other characters because the author jus tells us, it’s almost as if we are not reading story but a summary of things that happened. In conclusion I fell the author bit more than he can chew and didn’t give a chance for the plot to flow naturally. Oddly enough I kinda wish the author took a more cliched and generic approach and build upon it so we can, as readers can understand the story better. Sometimes it’s better to take a well trodden path and build on it than to build your own and forget to enjoy the scenery on the way. Best if luck and to the author ✍️ hope you keep writing this great novel

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Jack Alfonso, the seventh child of the youngest generation of the Alfonso family of Crystal city goes through a lot of trouble at home. His mother dies when he was still fifteen years old. Then, things get worse as he’s bullied by his older half siblings. In the end, he decided that since the Alfonso family couldn’t help him in this life, he would just have to look for a way by himself. He decides to use the small amount of money that he’d been saving since he was thirteen till he was nineteen. He leaves Crystal city that was under full influence of Alfonso family and goes to a backward city, Inchoate city where he starts a small business. Who knew that he when he received his first income, he received a prompt that startled him. [Ding! Congratulations on activating the Hundred Times Income Multiplier.] [Ding! You’ve earned three hundred dollars. Multiplier applied. You’ve received thirty thousand dollars.] [Ding! First income. As a reward, you gain a Suzuki GSX-R1000] [Ding! First income. As a reward, you gain a custom made Bugatti Veyron.] [Ding! The system can assist you. You’ll be rewarded with the professional driving skills. But, you’ll have to complete a task given to you at the specified period of time. If the task isn’t completed, then not only would you lose the skill, you’ll also be punished by the system.] [Ding! First income. As a reward, you gain a Eurocopter EC135] [Ding! First month of income earning. Rewarded with Glaze Hotel.] …. With that, his life immediately changed for the better. He didn’t know what would happen next but he had gained a new dream. He would want to become wealthier than Alfonso family. This way, at least they would regret not caring about him. But that wouldn’t be all, he would have to make sure that the family goes down. The reason for this was pretty simple, he found out the reason for his mother’s death! ….. Hello guys. This story is mainly romance related and we can say that there are some fiction parts. But, I hope that you like the story. Guys, with every 100 power stones, there will be an extra chapter. 200PS= 1 extra chapter 100GT= 2 extra chapters and so on. The release of the bonus chapters would be at the start of every month. So please, if you want more chapters, then put in those power stones and golden tickets, then leave the rest to me.... .... You can give me your opinions through; https://discord.gg/yaBqh38Q You can support my other novels, a fantasy genre, 'The Golden Star', 'The Soul System in the Apocalypse', 'The Bodyguard System', 'Twins With Systems: Complete the Mission'

Alan_Wafula · Urban
3.9
620 Chs