The story is good, however you are making your opponents way to weak. Like cmon. Like u win against jack so easily? The way u use Enel does not make him too op, but ur making his opponents way to weak. Learn from once piece; how luffy actually struggles in most of his fights, and variety of moves he uses and eventually learns, like in his battle against katakuri. Also Just having a strong devil fruit does not make you strong instantly; it’s just hard to fight against, which is typical for all logia uses. Plus you just gave him a plasma ball that can one shot kill someone “in the top 30” ha what a joke, especially considering that enel devil fruit is still in a unawakened state. And what’ with the continuous women falling for him. Also your pacing is way too wrong. Too many time skips, typically I do not mind it, but there’s barely any depths to your characters. There is barely no normal interactions with any of the side characters. It is like you give them a basic description and just go with it. Like when sanji went in to enel cabin, and straight away looked at the kitchen??? The only thing about sanji is not that he can only cook.
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Honestly, it might just be giving off that feeling, But it's not that the opponents are weak. The mc is just overpowered basically. Enel dropped a sun on Jack's head basically, the guy had no chance to dodge or block that much heat. Some characters could use some more depth, I get that, I do try to write a few interactions here and there, but more of the depth is usually given by the narrator going into their feelings and thoughts. Sanji simply didn't matter enough to the story to be given any depth, character development could be better for some characters tho :)) The time skips are there whenever the main character is training or travelling somewhere, there are a lot of them at the beginning of the story, unfortunately. Not that many after a while tho.
If anyone in the One Piece world has a similar capability of what you just said, then they'd be one of the strongest, if not the strongest, in the One Piece world. It takes time and continuous fights against strong people to get that strong, especially in a world like One Piece, yet some random guy who reincarnated into Enel suddenly became that strong. Even Luffy was trained from when he was a child by the Marine Hero to get that strong he us today. You keep making MC say that he could outrun anybody if they outmatched him like people in One Piece are not built differently.
VeganMaster:Honestly, it might just be giving off that feeling, But it's not that the opponents are weak. The mc is just overpowered basically. Enel dropped a sun on Jack's head basically, the guy had no chance to dodge or block that much heat. Some characters could use some more depth, I get that, I do try to write a few interactions here and there, but more of the depth is usually given by the narrator going into their feelings and thoughts. Sanji simply didn't matter enough to the story to be given any depth, character development could be better for some characters tho :)) The time skips are there whenever the main character is training or travelling somewhere, there are a lot of them at the beginning of the story, unfortunately. Not that many after a while tho.
Dude, Enel's power isn't that much changed from the original, I just made his lightning actually do damage based on heat, since plasma is actually hot believe it or not. The original Enel's lightning was nerfed to sh, Sanji shouldn't even have had bones left of his body after being hit head-on by an 'El Thor' with no Haki to protect him or anything. The only reason Luffy defeated him was cuz his IQ dropped to room temperature when fighting. Enel was able to travel throughout the entire island instantly, but just sat there and took hits like a shmuck. Which character in the series has shown that same speed up to this point besides Enel tho? Talking about the speed to travel instantly everywhere on the island they were on. Not that many essentially, maybe some other ppl at the top. But Enel can fly, so getting away from things should be easy af for him.
Great_Young_Master:If anyone in the One Piece world has a similar capability of what you just said, then they'd be one of the strongest, if not the strongest, in the One Piece world. It takes time and continuous fights against strong people to get that strong, especially in a world like One Piece, yet some random guy who reincarnated into Enel suddenly became that strong. Even Luffy was trained from when he was a child by the Marine Hero to get that strong he us today. You keep making MC say that he could outrun anybody if they outmatched him like people in One Piece are not built differently.
That doesn't seem like "not much change" from the original at all. That's a major buff. Plus, we're in the world of One Piece and not ours. What I'm really not a fan of is the attitude of the MC. The guy constantly says, "If I can't beat him, then I can just run away using my devil fruit." If that was that easy, then Luffy wouldn't even be able to hit him due to how fast he is, and that was only pre-timeskip Luffy. People such as Sengoku, Garp, and Akainu have decades of experience that could easily predict where the MC is going to be. Not to mention, those same people have most likely got used to speed faster than them due to people like Kizaru and gave them some type of experience of how to deal with such tricly foes who tries to run when they're in a pickle. Well, anyway, this doesn't really matter as your story is over 50 chapters and no use to dwell on things that's already done.
VeganMaster:Dude, Enel's power isn't that much changed from the original, I just made his lightning actually do damage based on heat, since plasma is actually hot believe it or not. The original Enel's lightning was nerfed to sh, Sanji shouldn't even have had bones left of his body after being hit head-on by an 'El Thor' with no Haki to protect him or anything. The only reason Luffy defeated him was cuz his IQ dropped to room temperature when fighting. Enel was able to travel throughout the entire island instantly, but just sat there and took hits like a shmuck. Which character in the series has shown that same speed up to this point besides Enel tho? Talking about the speed to travel instantly everywhere on the island they were on. Not that many essentially, maybe some other ppl at the top. But Enel can fly, so getting away from things should be easy af for him.
Ye, his attitude would put him in trouble with people with advanced observation. But you need to keep in mind that his observation haki is one of his strongest suits as well, which makes him even harder to hit. The buff feels pretty major, but that's just because the Nerf lightning got in the original is really major. Fire still burns in the world of one piece, same as magma, by that same logic lighting should still turn a human crispy with ease, but Oda forgot about it, I guess. I do like talking about these types of things btw, even if the story's already past that point :)) Thanks for reading this, regardless of its faults.
Great_Young_Master:That doesn't seem like "not much change" from the original at all. That's a major buff. Plus, we're in the world of One Piece and not ours. What I'm really not a fan of is the attitude of the MC. The guy constantly says, "If I can't beat him, then I can just run away using my devil fruit." If that was that easy, then Luffy wouldn't even be able to hit him due to how fast he is, and that was only pre-timeskip Luffy. People such as Sengoku, Garp, and Akainu have decades of experience that could easily predict where the MC is going to be. Not to mention, those same people have most likely got used to speed faster than them due to people like Kizaru and gave them some type of experience of how to deal with such tricly foes who tries to run when they're in a pickle. Well, anyway, this doesn't really matter as your story is over 50 chapters and no use to dwell on things that's already done.
