webnovel
Randomfish113
Randomfish113Lv142yr
2022-08-24 06:34

I've read all the free chapters, but I'll stop there. It's an ok story, but I have a hard time reading it due to the rather poor writing. Quite a few grammatical errors, the sentence building is problematic and the text doesn't flow and/or come together (for me at least). I have to say that the quality of writing increases a bit as the story goes on, but not enough for me to spend money on it. The story itself might be worth a read, if you can stand the writing.

Liked by 3 people

LIKE
empty img

No replies. Be the first!

Other Reviews
Mohitkumar
MohitkumarAuthor

Hello to all the readers who decided to stop by and gave my book a look. I am thankful for all the support and blessings of the reader who decided to spend time on my book. With this review, I wanted to point out some things. 1. As you saw in the title, it will be a harem and the mc will have five wives I will assure you that there will be no more addition. It will begin with five and end with five wives. 2. Some readers may find that interaction is quite less between mc and his wives and some feel that it had been late since mc wives are introduced. So, I wanted to tell you that Mc wives will be introduced one by one slowly. It was done so that Mc can grow up and before meeting his wives, he can at least have some achievements and strength. I don't want to write a story where mc runs after chasing girls where girls run after mc thinking he is so cool and wonderful and every hundred chapters another female lead is introduced which is making the story with harem quite bad. So, even if you dislike harem, I ask you to give you a try and judge with your own eyes how different the story is from other typical harem. 3.By the time, I write this review it hadn't been 6 months since I stated as an author.Reader may find some grammatical mistakes. Since I am not a native English person and I write on an old smartphone which hangs a lot while typing so I ask you to pardon me on that. But I will assure you that the story would be readable unlike my first books whose beginning grammar was quite bad.Even mtl trash grammar is better than my other book beginning. That's for all know and I hope you like it and support my WSA work.

FloShizu
FloShizuLv14

This is for you author, since one can have a good discussion with you without getting heated up even if one attacks your book, so i decided to make a more in depth review and while many points still stand I removed the points where I out of my own preferences was a little unfair. Writing Quality: 3/5 It's MTL, so don't expect anything amazing. Especially in the earlier chapters, there are many issues like wrong pronouns, wrong sentence structures or swapped roles in a sentence and so on. But I have seen a lot worse and it is enjoyable if you like the story itself. I think just by going through the older chapters and looking at the comments where a helpful reader already wrote the correct version and then correct it, would make it a 4/5 for new readers. Stability of Updates: 4/5 Not much to say. Coming from royalroad 14 chapters a week is inconceivable and impressive. I always imagine that the quality suffers, so I don't like this way very much and would like to see quality over quantity like on royalroad. But I know that people on this site probably see it differently. Story Development: 3/5 The problem I have with the story is that I like to see the way the MC has to go in order to become strong or even the strongest, but instead it was only said that he had a training arc with the goddesses, but it was skipped and instead he slowly unlocks the abilities he learned from them through the system. So the reader just sees a list of (yet locked/lvl 0) active and passive skills the MC gets at the beginning of the story and that makes them seem less special and deserved (even if they are). Another thing I dislike is that the story skips around too much, so there is not enough time for proper kingdom/world building, character development, forming of relationships and so on. This makes everything seem less deep and lack substance. But I think the plot itself has potential. It just needs refining. Character Design 3/5 Like I said, everything lacks substance and so do the characters and the relationship they have with the MC. I have only seen the first three wives and I can already tell that they are very cliche and the others sound to be the same. The same goes for the MC, since he is just like MC in most novels. Person with sad past gets reincarnated and becomes powerful, so he can now beat up the bad guys. And this brings up another point of criticism. Sad pasts. It has become the standard in newer novels and I don't like to see it in every book, especially if every important character gets one. MC has one and both wives he met up until now have one as well, so I would prefer if its not the same for the other wives as well. But I like that he can be ruthless if he has a reason. World Background 3/5 The quality and the amount we get is comparable to other web novels on this site and I feel like, as always, it is lacking and I would love to see more detailed worlds like in normal fantasy books, but that's just my preference and maybe people like to read more simple books on this site. I think the best thing the author can do for this book and the next is to slow down with releases, instead of two a day, maybe just write one and instead read proof, take your time to write and rewrite until you got some good quality chapters, instead of just throwing out chapters for the sake of it. Maybe check out different translators and grammar checks and go with the best you can find. I think you can do a lot better if you just take your time and you end up with a shorter/slower released but nice quality book. Instead of being a good author, try to be a very good one. I think you can do it.

Daoist_Paradox
Daoist_ParadoxLv4
Related Stories

Re: Evolution Online

On just another normal Monday, a new virtual reality game called "Evolution Online" launched out of nowhere and took the world by storm. People were blown away by the game鈥檚 hyper-realistic features and endless adventures. Everyone from small companies to big corporations and governments scrambled to get a foothold on this mysterious video game. But what they didn't know was that this game was actually a tutorial for the upcoming apocalypse that was about to hit the planet! The game was a precursor to the Earth's first evolution, where mana was going to be unleashed into the real world! Liam, a high school student who had faced numerous setbacks in his life, turned to 'Evolution Online' in the hope of changing his fate, but instead, he got trapped in the game's twisted world, and things went from bad to worse. When the apocalypse finally arrived, Liam barely managed to escape, but his situation didn't improve. Along with millions of others, he died a miserable death, unable to fight back and filled with regret. However, Liam's story didn't end there. He found himself inexplicably transported back in time before everything started! Armed with the knowledge of what was to come, Liam was determined to become the strongest and most powerful player, unleashing destruction upon the world that had ruined him before! This time, things were going to be different! ******************* Discord Link for chatting with author and character art https://discord.gg/XS7gWScKn8

YolohyFantasy
4.8
1427 Chs

Primordial Villain with a Slave Harem

Quinlan, a simple office worker finds himself transmigrated to an extremely dangerous fantasy land as a level 1 Commoner with nothing to his name but his wits - and a unique gift that accompanied his teleportation. No one in Thalorind could have predicted that this unassuming arrival would one day rise to the top, redefining the very meaning of the term 'power'... And that he may have achieved said result by joining a criminal organization and clawing his way through its ranks. In the beginning, Quinlan was painfully weak and alone but thanks to his severe trust issues, joining a team was... hard. However, he soon noticed that a lot of people have collars around their necks in this world... People that couldn't exactly betray him. Follow Quinlan's journey as he grows in strength, amasses wealth, fights to the death, and meets lovely ladies. ... Discord: https://discord.gg/bjunEkswQ3 ... After writing over 750 chapters, here鈥檚 what you should know: 1. About the beginning: The early chapters are a bit rough. I'm not saying that it's horrible, in fact, I believe the story to be very enjoyable right from chapter 1. But, at the end of the day, this is my first original novel, and I stumbled in some areas, especially with the MC's attitude. He's too reserved and occasionally too "simpy" with the first female lead. However, the MC grows into a confident, powerful, and composed figure. No long-term cringe. He becomes the kind of MC you want to root for. 2. Quinlan鈥檚 morality: He鈥檚 not a cruel, sadistic villain. Most of the time, he won't even be acting like a real villain, only when pushed to the limit. Meaning he won't torture puppies or civilians for fun while cackling manically. However, he鈥檚 greedy, shameless, and opportunistic. If the lives of his loved ones are at stake and he can only save them by burning a city with innocents inside down, he鈥檒l do it. He's ruthless toward strangers when necessary, but doesn't delight in cruelty. 3. Regarding slaves: Yes, Quinlan becomes a slave master. However, he treats all his women鈥攆ree or enslaved鈥攚ith care and respect. 4. More than smut: Every love interest has a real story, a real presence. No girl will be left behind. As of Chapter 750, Quinlan has 7 lovers and a few more "in-development" love interests. This is not a "catch them all" story, adding one girl every 20 chapters. I prefer harems made up of girls with richly developed characters over giant harems full of shallow ladies. Quality over Quantity. 5. Balanced storytelling: My aim was to create a work where romance, action, and slice-of-life blend together naturally. There鈥檚 high-stakes action, power progression, romantic developments, comedy, and some chill downtime to let both the characters and the readers breathe. 6. Weak-to-Strong Progression: Quinlan will become OP. But he rises slowly, not overnight. His journey will hopefully feel earned. 7. Not every female character listed in the fandom is a love interest: Some women are important to the plot but are not part of the harem or a planned to be, such as his two mothers. 8. No Yuri. No NTR. That's it, thank you for taking your chance on my novel! I'll make a promise to you, showing how much I believe you'll love the novel if you get over the somewhat bumpy beginning! If you read 750 chapters and hate the story even after investing so much time into it, then you may burn me alive!

NecroBinFantasy
4.6
783 Chs

Strongest Mage with the Lust system

[ Warning: Mature content R-18 ] Is death a new begining? For Max, it was. Max, a twenty-year-old virgin, got attacked by a bear in forest and died an untimely death. Fortunately for him... that wasn't the end to his story. In the next instant, he found himself transmigrated into the body of a noble's youngest son in a world full of Magic, wonders and... beautiful women. As if God was making up for his untimely death, he also got a system -The Lust System. "I can become stronger just by having sex?" Join the journey of Max and watch he have the time of his life and become the strongest mage the world had ever seen before. ______________________________ [Things to be noted] 1. From the title, you should've guessed it already but let me tell you the story will be filled with many sexual adventures. So... you are welcome to enjoy them..... 2. However... don't expect MC to have sexual relations with every woman he meets. I'll be focusing on the story, and would 'Try' not to blindly throw sex scenes left and right. 3. Most importantly, this is my first time writing so the the quality of first 50 or so may be a bit lacking (But it would cause you no problem if a few minor errors don't bother you). 4. It is a slow paced story. If you want everything to be explosive and fast, maybe this isn't for you. Important Note: If you enjoy the story then don't forget to vote your GTs, Power stones and also if you can, send some GIFTS too. This poor soul would appreciate it. Also check out My other work: [ Rise of the Strongest War God ] & [ My perverted devil system ] Happy reading~ ________________

Blizzard54kFantasy
4.5
805 Chs