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DaoistH7599X
DaoistH7599XLv41yr
2022-12-29 15:48

Painfully stupid. From the very start with his dumb wishes and dumb talk with a ROB that judges rinnegan worth 2 wishes and the system costs 1, don't know what else to say, it is just dumb xianxia of mediocre level even in its own league.

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ShaggyJoestar69
ShaggyJoestar69Author

Good that's the point.

Other Reviews
ThePath
ThePathLv1

Started good and funny but devolved to a cheap and badly written Xianxia knock-off. In the first chapters of the story I thought it would be a good "Crackfic" which is fun and making of the Xianxia trope mixed with an absurdly overpowered system. This however quickly dissolved and the MC just became a wanderer type alchemist following all the cliches this trope has to offer, I honestly think the creativity of the author died. The whole thing needs a re-write, the start although creative and funny doesn't flow correctly and is not well written, author the book "Story Genius: How to Use Brain Science to Go Beyond Outlining and Write a Riveting Novel" is a good one on the subject. I would like to see more western comical elements, you gave him the memories of the one and only Rick Sanchez, that is completely absurd and could've made this whole work funnier if you employed some of his crazy characteristics, although memories does not equal personality and thinking patterns they should have had a gigantic change to the MC. The MC should've embraced more of Ricks mad scientist instead of nihilistic genius (since he got young ricks memories), so stuff like him releasing T-Virus equivalents to power up non-cultivators and other wacky stuff that would've made the whole plot more engaging. An over-arching plot-point would be nice, for example MC is in one of the lower realms that exist and in the end we find that the one who is managing/created the realms did so he can sacrifice the souls of people living there for power. However our MC does not care about that. Anyway, in conclusion your novel sparked my imagination but failed to deliver, a good fan-fiction that did something similar would be "You are Courting Death" but that one didn't have a crazy scientist. Overall if you re-write this I know you can do a lot better

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