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Gabichu_Yeah
Gabichu_YeahLv33yr
2021-07-14 00:44

Hohoho daoist of culture I like your novel. 💪 ................................................................................................................

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Alexandertheokay
AlexandertheokayLv3
Yuri_is_Ntr
Yuri_is_NtrLv5

I whould keep this simple and easy. There is a huge problem with pacing. Too many characters needs to be introtuced, too many girls needs attention, and too events happened in a small amount of time. When author asked what did you expect from mc, he wasn't in a world for even a week-yes, he wasn't. But maybe he should and that is a problem? 30 chapters we a not even in rizer arc. Shinmai maou in like 5 episods? So when you have so little time and so many characters all others problems comes in naturally. Why mc spending his points in useless stuff and wouldn't even train for a bit with his sword, or buy skills that whould help him improver himself? Especially when you lost so many internal monologues of how grave and serious situation he is? Because mc is not even one week in the world, making him op whould be boring. Even though getting op for toujo basara with boosted gear and skill creation - whould be easy-peasy. But oh well. Why all the changes are so close to original or lackluster? Because there is so many different stories that creating different dynamics are hard. Too many variables need to be adjusted. Why it's feels like old school rpg when all progres in side quests whould be nulled until main quest getting to the next point? Like saya talks about her feelings then just getting forgotten for 10 chapters straight. Same with different girls. Until main heroine wouldn't come they are on hold. You could skip whole chapters without any differences. What is power system, how different factions whould fair against each others? What whould elder brother of rias whould say about they unnoficial contract? Between mc and rias. Could he get in this mess with mc who have a lot of ties with different factions. Iseei was ideal, because he is just a human. Conclusion :the story like a pazzle. Author trying to make it work without knowing a whole picture.

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Pokemon Alternate Universe Adventures

A man from an Earth gets the choice to start over in any Universe and chooses an Alternate Pokemon Universe. Let us see if his journey to the top is succesful and the impact he will have on his new world. Pokemon is owned by Nintendo, Game Freak and Creatures Inc. I just use their sandbox for the plot of my MC and my OCs. This will be a "slow" paced story, in fact it's "super slow paced", so please don't expect the MC to directly start his journey in 20 chapters or so, actually multiply that by like 15. A lot is going to happen before that happens. The first 10-20 chapters or so are information heavy, depending on what kind of reader you are. I try to keep my chapter length between 2000 and 3000 words per chapter. My release rate is 4 chapter/week for now. I have a patre*n for those that want to support me with access to some advance chapters as a thank you. patre*n.com/Azrail93 This is an alternate pokemon universe so there will be differences to the games, manga and anime. So if something in the story is different it is most likely on purpose. The original sources are seen as suggestions not laws. Differences can be: Type variants, evolution conditions, strength mechanics, world building and more. If I am at some point asking for reader input I will do so but otherwise I will ignore most suggestions. So please don't spam things like catch this pokemon or do that next. I have my plot planned and external input will be considered when asked for. If I see a suggestion that I believe fit my plot flow I will use it and will credit the commentor. Comments on spelling and grammar mistakes are welcome. I will try to correct said mistakes with time. Constructive criticism will be read and considered. Insult and hate comments will be ignored or deleted depending on severity. Readers naturally can comment their dislike but one worders will be ignored. If the reason for the dislike is explained I will read it. Like previously mentioned pure insults and hate comments will be ignored or deleted. The same is true for simple hate reviews or insulting ones. Reviews complaining about something I warned about, such as the slow pace, will be deleted as well.

Azrail93 · Anime & Comics
4.5
865 Chs