Review Detail of Hugo_Adam in 已删除
Review detail
it looks promising, so before the author(probably)f*uck-up some things i would like to give him a few tips(merely suggesting, don't take offence). 1: please develop their feelings properly. Don't simply make a timeskip and say that they have fallen in love in the middle as many other novels whose mc have a romantic interest during childhood . 2:Don't use scythes. They may look cool, but they're ridiculously impractical(and somewhat overused) since he will have to get the scythe past his enemy and then pull inward to cut something. 3: supposing, his previous experience as an assassin will affect his fighting style I would like to suggest twin daggers. Pros: fast, dual purpose(simultaneous attack, defend with one and attack with another), simple(no need for complicated movesets like sword styles). Cons: normally requires close range( thought i think that he can can compensate that with Shadow manipulation and throw them like Gilgamesh).
已删除
FanficSlayer2021
Liked by 28 people
LIKEReplies21
Thank you for your suggestions. I’ll try to really work hard on how they develop feelings for each other throught a lot of slice of life during their childhood. Hope you’ll like it. As for the weapons I was thinking the same or maybe a katana as secondary weapon that he’ll use when he fights against a lot of people at the same time. If you have any tips throughout the fanfic or you see that the romance is too fast to your liking pls comment either on the paragraph or the chapter as a whole. I usually spend some time answering question and checking the comments every day. Thank you for the review and stay safe 😉
My advice is make it a single parring or limit the harem as much as you can. And please please don’t just make him hookup with every girl Yun Che hooks up with in canon. Too many stories do that. Think about his personality and see if the girl fits. Don’t just think, hey she is hot she should be with him. The problem with harems, is the bigger they are the harder it is to write them well. And to write them well you need to dedicate a good portion of your story to character interactions. So if you intend to make it more than a single paring, make sure you take your time with it.
FanficSlayer2021:Thank you for your suggestions. I’ll try to really work hard on how they develop feelings for each other throught a lot of slice of life during their childhood. Hope you’ll like it. As for the weapons I was thinking the same or maybe a katana as secondary weapon that he’ll use when he fights against a lot of people at the same time. If you have any tips throughout the fanfic or you see that the romance is too fast to your liking pls comment either on the paragraph or the chapter as a whole. I usually spend some time answering question and checking the comments every day. Thank you for the review and stay safe 😉
Thank for your advice and I don’t plan on making him take another girl from yun che, just quingyue. Also the harem will only have 3 girls (maybe a fourth one but it won’t be more than that) and I’ll take my time for them to really develop feelings for each other.
Zerak:My advice is make it a single parring or limit the harem as much as you can. And please please don’t just make him hookup with every girl Yun Che hooks up with in canon. Too many stories do that. Think about his personality and see if the girl fits. Don’t just think, hey she is hot she should be with him. The problem with harems, is the bigger they are the harder it is to write them well. And to write them well you need to dedicate a good portion of your story to character interactions. So if you intend to make it more than a single paring, make sure you take your time with it.
Huntsman:I think a Western longsword and a dagger would be better. Twin daggers are too limited in range, a sword and a dagger would let him fight in medium range and closer.
It would not be better if in terms of weapons it would be a pair of daggers for melee and to complement it with the skill of the skilled thrower and manipulator of knives Sakuya Isayoi of Tohou or is it already with which weapon the MC will be?
FanficSlayer2021:Thank you for your suggestions. I’ll try to really work hard on how they develop feelings for each other throught a lot of slice of life during their childhood. Hope you’ll like it. As for the weapons I was thinking the same or maybe a katana as secondary weapon that he’ll use when he fights against a lot of people at the same time. If you have any tips throughout the fanfic or you see that the romance is too fast to your liking pls comment either on the paragraph or the chapter as a whole. I usually spend some time answering question and checking the comments every day. Thank you for the review and stay safe 😉
I would say he will use dual daggers when fighting against one person or a smal group. However if he comes to fight again, let’s say an entire sect then he could use throwing knives here and there during his massacre But he’d mainly use a katana as a volley of throwing weapong could be blocked by someone stronger than him or someone with a defensive treasure. Hope u understand 😊
1Dreamer_Owl:It would not be better if in terms of weapons it would be a pair of daggers for melee and to complement it with the skill of the skilled thrower and manipulator of knives Sakuya Isayoi of Tohou or is it already with which weapon the MC will be?image
FanficSlayer2021:Thank for your advice and I don’t plan on making him take another girl from yun che, just quingyue. Also the harem will only have 3 girls (maybe a fourth one but it won’t be more than that) and I’ll take my time for them to really develop feelings for each other.
You’re going to use a Katana... why do I always get disappointed when I already know authors are gonna be unoriginal. I don’t understand why you’d use a JAPANESE weapon in a CHINESE setting. It makes zero sense, lol.
FanficSlayer2021:I would say he will use dual daggers when fighting against one person or a smal group. However if he comes to fight again, let’s say an entire sect then he could use throwing knives here and there during his massacre But he’d mainly use a katana as a volley of throwing weapong could be blocked by someone stronger than him or someone with a defensive treasure. Hope u understand 😊
Seud:You’re going to use a Katana... why do I always get disappointed when I already know authors are gonna be unoriginal. I don’t understand why you’d use a JAPANESE weapon in a CHINESE setting. It makes zero sense, lol.
FanficSlayer2021:In the end I changed it to saber like the one he used against the beats after timeskip ...
FanficSlayer2021:In the end I changed it to saber like the one he used against the beats after timeskip ...
yeah I don't think it's better to advise author to do this or that.... writing more harem members properly needs more skill as the romance should be written differently for each that's why some mess it up but I have seen many authors done it better with huge harem only difference is writing skills ...so if you are able and confident in writing more harem members then do otherwise just write however you want , end of the day it's a fanfiction and they are first and foremost written by authors for their own enjoyment .... I have seen a lot of authors try to change too much things by taking advice from readers then eff it up later and leave the story I hope you are not like this ....
you seem to advice other authors too much...try to chill and write your own story maybe if you have that deep sea of knowledge...
Zerak:My advice is make it a single parring or limit the harem as much as you can. And please please don’t just make him hookup with every girl Yun Che hooks up with in canon. Too many stories do that. Think about his personality and see if the girl fits. Don’t just think, hey she is hot she should be with him. The problem with harems, is the bigger they are the harder it is to write them well. And to write them well you need to dedicate a good portion of your story to character interactions. So if you intend to make it more than a single paring, make sure you take your time with it.
Advice is purely that. Advice. It’s up to the author what they decide to do with that advice. If I like it I read and if I don’t I say thank you for the ride and stop reading. Feed back is an important part of improving. It doesn’t mean you need to follow everything or even anything people say.
Deadrule_vivek:you seem to advice other authors too much...try to chill and write your own story maybe if you have that deep sea of knowledge...