Review Detail of Aeternabilis in A New World, an immersive game experience

Oh, I mentioned the name so thoroughly as well because by the synopsis the mc is going to search deep into the world around him like roleplay. Take his character and the world around him, looking into magic, nature, history etc Him then choosing the name he did doesn't fit with this. The Author compromising again what he built up like with the forced humour type of thing.

He isn't that fat, lol. I did mention it is a slight belly, not that he is terribly obese. And it is normal to cycle to class and still be able to gain weight, simply due to a poor diet, overeating or other things. Which doesn't really cost that much. I mean it is easy to eat too much bread along with normal food. As an example. It is just something at the start, which I did indeed force. But it shouldn't be overly brought up, at least I don't think I did. The name part I get, but then again everyone can decide on any character name in a game. So I normally don't really understand why people dislike it. Let me know when you are further in...

Understandable. But I am not good with names, so this is something which will never really be good in my book. Can't come up with random names, it always feels to weird for me when I try.

You mentioned he had a beer belly no? and then when he entered the game people made fun of him because he was fat? Maybe it was your wording at the start that made it seem larger than you intended it to? Plus overeating can do that however he balances it out not just with the biking 30mins? Every day, but just going to the university during the weekdays and on the weekends it was mentioned he likes going outside. Sorry, but adding on all of these I can't possibly see him being fat af, with a massive beer belly. Plus even if he was a little chubby from overeating like you said and had a slight stomach he should have been able to get rid of that during the character creation. Hope that explains it a bit more? Glad it won't be mentioned as I said cause then it should be easily ignored?

With the name thing maybe chose a random name generator or type in elf names and decide? That is what I do as I get you, I struggle on names a lot as well. Want the perfect one always. You said you don't like random names so when looking at the list and choosing a name. Maybe search up what that name means for that culture until you find one you like? Like search into the name more until find the right one. I get what you mean if this was a casual game then it wouldn't rly matter much. However, this isn't just any game. It's the best deep dive game out there. Something your whole book is based around. Plus like I mentioned in the synopsis it was mentioned the mc was like a roleplayer? Searching into magic, history etc? He should want to even more meld into that role fitting in with the world etc Getting into character etc Hope that makes sense xD

Might have come over like that yeah. Beer belly for me is just when your stomach forms a bulge -I would say. Naturally it can be quite small or large. Think this is where I failed to communicate it properly. It doesn't really cancel out, as you need to do much more to lose weight, than is required to gain it. (Unless you have a specific metabolism. -Can make it harder or easier.) In any case, hope you will give it a try. And let me know what else bugs you. I try to learn from those comments.

I have tried it, but then I have to rely one what elvish is from say Tolkien. So I now normally do it with greek or japanese for strange names of things. I didn't want to really depend on it too much, as I felt it wasn't the best option. Don't really know why.

I dunno for me and where I come from (UK) (think most do anyway) A beer belly is massive. It isn't slight at all, its fcking huge xD Plus he is 19? He shouldn't be able to get a beer belly that early? Unless he is an alcoholic that does nothing but drink every day in his life? Matching this with the background you created for him, it doesn't fit his character at all? Again with his background and all the exercise and activity he does (from what was mentioned) even if he eats more than he should it can't make him fat. He should be healthy if anything. Then with the character creation, he wouldn't have that fat if he chooses to get rid of it as he tried. I mean from the standpoint of the background you created for him it doesn't add up. This is why I commented on it, saying it was forced etc Hope this makes sense? Not trying to tell you what to do or anything. Just saying that if you want the mc to be fat you have to show it through his lifestyle and background. Something that you didn't and it came off (to me) as trying to add humour when there was no need for it. Keep saying it but hope you get what I mean xD

I don't get what you mean?

Oh, here it is just when you stomach forms a visible bulge, can be only 10 or 15 kg's overweight. So when you weight 100 not due to muscle. but weight. I think the word I used is wrong then, maybe. :)

I didn't want to rely one the elvish language, since it is made via other authors. I felt it was wrong to just used that continuously.

But isn't Haru a name that someone else came up with? So are most things? Wouldn't it be somewhat irrelevant then? Plus the random name gen or list isn't made by Authors it's just named that sound elvish?

Haru means spring in Japanese, it is a word and also a name. It also relates to new beginnings, which is way I chose it. As I wanted it to represent his new life's start inside the game. You previously said you didn't care for that as it wasn't elvish, so I don't really now. My aim might then not be what you want, but I still feel it is a good choice for what I wanted. I didn't want a difficult name from elvish, as many are. And I wanted it to have meaning at the time I chose it. And yeah all names are created by others, I will likely do it for NPCs. But players I feel will be random names. I will try to make it more fitting, but I can't guarantee. In any case, it is a subjective thing. Hope this answer made you understand my thought process. Don't know why I even explain, I just always try to. Guess I want people to understand my viewpoint for some reason. :)