The whine of the engines echoed through the transport cargo hold as the door raised closed. It was the third to leave in the last four hours, but Evander kept his focus on the screen of his visor. He was working to coordinate the various pairs of his squad scattered and watching for enemy movements. The first three transports had all made it back to the green zone without incident.
"How's it looking, Evander?"
Poros called out to him from a few meters away. He wore his environmental suit, it's helmet obstructing the view of his face. He could easily be mistaken for a Ba-S farmer at a glance. However, the Shift Tuner stuck on the chest plate and the other additional outer equipment to facilitate movement quickly killed that assessment.
"Good. All team comms are in. No reported movement. You're clear to launch."
The shorter man gave a nod. He approached the wall of the next craft and concentrated. Wispy streaks of purple energy strung his suit which began to phase as his hand passed through. He'd rode back only to check in and pick up another set of suit filters. He was going to need it if the extraction took longer than estimated.
Evander returned to the latest tactical analysis with his own visor. After the report of contacts in a few locations, there had been nothing. His assumption was that a scouting mission had stumbled upon them. The fact that they were encountered at this location on their side of the Confluence wasn't good, but it also meant that there weren't any reinforcements for the enemy. They would have arrived by now if they knew about it. The mission was proceeding well on schedule.
He forwarded the revised timelines to Vanguard Command and finally had a minute where he was actually standing still. The man exhaled deeply and braced himself. He looked outside the window of the mobile command base and saw Naia with her eyes closed, leaning against a pillar.
She was obviously taking a breather and had been on a more intensive duty for far longer than the others. Replacement Harmony Navigators to run the shifts on 'stability' had only just arrived with the last units. They'd been pulled off less important missions as quickly as possible, but it still took time.
He considered it for a few seconds. He made his choice. He'd had to, in order to prepare himself to act. He couldn't do spontaneity that well. It still *felt* like that was what he was doing when he heard himself speak.
"Naia. Can we talk?"
Her eyes opened slowly and she looked over at him. She was wearing a smile, but her eyes looked tired.
"What is it, Squad Leader?"
Evander's mouth opened for a moment, but the words didn't come. He paused to consider his approach. His visor glowed with his temporarily red eyes, but it didn't help. Instead, he remembered their arrival here - how in warp transit she still took his hand.
Logically, he knew it was because of her trauma. He knew that she was more comfortable around him than anyone else. He had felt the same about her, and still did. That was why he chose to apologize for pushing her. But he didn't. Instead he talked about-
"Theia."
The woman's eyebrows raised slightly and her eyes widened. The change in her expression was slight, but he could see it. He knew he had to clarify or she might think he meant something else. He'd made a kind of choice there, too, but it wasn't the time to talk about it with her.
"The ward she was sent to. I wanted to check on her personally. I needed to make sure she was okay."
The red haired man crossed his arms over his chest and stared at the ground. At the time he hadn't realized his need to check on her wasn't entirely on a professional level, but recognizing his regret about the orders he gave as an 'emotion' helped. It allowed him to contextualize the rest of the event.
"I was the one who sent the two of you ahead to those coordinates."
Naia wanted to ask... that if that's what was troubling him, then why hadn't she been important enough to seek out? But she held her tired voice. She held the question itself inside her - and swallowed it down.
"I know. Evander, it's not your fault. There was no way you could have known-"
"That's right. I couldn't have known. But that doesn't change the fact that I made that decision. So when the doctors were being evasive about her recovery and location, I went to check."
That had been his tactical reasoning at the time, though the words from Poros made him consider that he might not have been nearly as obsessed with finding out the truth of any other squad member.
"There were guards to keep people out that were hidden and a nurse that seemed like she was there just to keep away people that could be talked off."
He wasn't completely sure why he was saying so much about this. Perhaps he simply wanted to talk to someone... he trusted. Maybe he needed to share this with someone. He was also trying to set the stage for something else.
"I discovered a tendency in her older medical records for them to be falsified. I don't know where she is, but I don't think she was ever sent to the 7th Ward."
Naia frowned. She'd easily pushed away some of her hurt and jealousy in the face of his last few sentences.
"They falsified her records? So we can't even know... if she's still alive?"
The man shook his head. Evander didn't think anyone with the authority to make changes to these documents on this scale and for this long would only try and hide her death.
"No. I don't think she died. I think the only thing that could have gotten her moved immediately would have been her current condition. We don't know what it is, but it would have been something unusual with her powers."
The Navigator's hands balled into fists and her eyes narrowed. She suddenly remembered that their commander had erased her friendliness and called her condition 'complex' when she asked after the woman.
"But why would they lie about it? Doesn't that mean there *is* something... wrong with her?"
Evander felt the weight of her words settle heavily on his shoulders. The possibility sent a chill through him - not just for the chaos wielder's sake - but for what it might mean for all of them. The increasing reports of the creatures they'd fought twice with her power now meant she was an important asset... and maybe an important research subject.
Even re-reading its a lot harder to come up with pithy comments when you wrote something over a week ago.
By that time you've totally lost some of your own engagement in this part of the work.
Well, it mostly boils down to Ev *almost* being reasonably vulnerable and apologizing - and instead shifting to another area of his recent concern.
I believe most have had moments like that, where you kind of wanted to say something to a person but instead talked about something else because of some sense of awkwardness.
Unless you are one of those truth to mouth at all times folks, to which I commend your candor.