Anxiety (3)

I laid on my bed and felt like I was finally able to get some sleep for the first time in a while, all this pent up stress went away after I was able to speak to Remi.

I closed my eyes and felt myself drifting off to sleep, but I couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong.

I woke up and saw that it was dark outside, I got out of my bed and looked at the clock. It was 3:30 AM. I went to the bathroom and splashed some water on my face, trying to wake myself up. I decided to take a stroll outside and breathe in the fresh air. It was a nice night, the moon was full, and the stars were shining bright. I looked at the sky and thought about the future, what would I do if I ever lost Remi, Leo, or Reagan.

"No, I won't let anything happen to them, I will protect them no matter what." I said to myself.

I continued walking around the campus, and I saw Zion sitting on a bench. It's been months since I last saw him, I almost forgot he even existed.

"You look like shit, Sora." Zion chuckled.

"It's been a rough couple of weeks." I replied.

He laughed and said, "I bet, you must have gone through a lot."

"You could say that." I replied.

He stood up and said, "I heard about the whole Lich situation, You were lucky that Reagan was there to help."

"Yeah I was lucky, he sure wasn't. He almost got killed because of me, literally."

Zion gave me a sympathetic look and said, "I understand, Sora, I've been there."

"You haven't, have you ever felt useless against yourself, have you watched your friends almost die in front of you because you were too weak to do anything?" I said, tears forming in my eyes.

"I'm not doing this shit Sora, I don't care what you've seen, you haven't seen anything yet." Zion replied.

"Oh yeah? Well let me show you what I've been through these past couple of weeks, I've been through hell and back just to get here, and you want to tell me that I haven't seen anything." I said, my voice getting louder with each word.

I felt myself losing control of my anger, and I didn't care, all I wanted was for Zion to understand what I have been through.

"So we're back to square one like we were at the start of the school year, grow up Sora. THIS WORLD DOESN'T SLOW DOWN FOR ANYONE, ESPECIALLY NOT YOU."

He grabbed me by my shirt and lifted me up. My eyes widened at the strength he possessed, how was this possible?

"You want me to be real with you, Sora, then I'll be real with you. When you were fighting Future Sora, I was here dealing with my own problems, I had to deal with a lot of bullshit because you weren't here. So don't come to me acting like you're some sort of victim, you aren't. The only thing you are is a coward."

I felt a sharp pain in my chest as if my heart was being pierced by a knife. His words hurt more than any physical injury ever could.

"You're right, Zion, I'm a coward. I'm scared of everything, but most of all, I'm scared of losing the people I care about. That is why I want to be strong, so I can protect the ones I love."

"Then stop running away from your problems and face them head on."

"I can't, I'M NOT STRONG ENOUGH TO FACE THEM. I'M TOO WEAK!" I screamed.

Zion let go of me and said, "Then get stronger, Sora. You won't be able to protect anyone if you don't."

He turned around and walked away, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

I stood there for a while, trying to process everything that just happened.

"I'm weak." I thought to myself.

I fell to my knees and started crying. I couldn't stop the tears from flowing out of my eyes, they were like rivers running down my face.

"I'm sorry, Remi, Leo, Reagan."

"I'm not strong enough."

I stayed like that for a while until I felt someone put their hand on my shoulder. I looked up and saw Remi standing over me.

"Sora, are you alright?" She asked.

"Remi, what are you doing here?" I replied.

"I came to check on you, I was worried about you, you've been acting strange lately." She said.

"Remi, I'm not okay." I said.

"What's wrong, Sora?" She asked.

"EVERYTHING! Nothing I do goes right anymore, I feel useless, I used to be the one teaching everyone and ever since Future Sora put me in that coma, I've been a liability." I replied.

"Sora, that's not true, you're an important part of this team."

"I'm not, Remi, I'm weak. I can't even protect the people I care about. How can I protect you or anyone else when I can't even protect myself." I said.

"That's not true, Sora, you've protected me plenty of times before, you're not weak, you're strong." She replied.

"I'm not, Remi, I'm nothing but a burden."

"Sora, look at me."

I looked up at Remi and saw her looking back at me with determination in her eyes.

"You aren't a burden, you're our friend, and we'll always be there for you." She said.

"Remi." I replied.

"No matter what happens, we'll be here for you, Sora."

"I know, Remi, thank you." I replied.

We sat there for a while, neither of us saying anything, until finally, I broke the silence.

"Remi, I need you to promise me something."

"What is it, Sora?"

"Promise me that you won't die."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, promise me that you'll never leave me. No matter what happens, we'll always be together." I said.

"I promise, Sora." She replied.

I smiled and said, "Thank you, Remi. You're the best."

"You're welcome, Sora, but don't forget, you promised me something too."

"What did I promise?"

"That you'll always be there for me."

"Oh yeah, I remember."

"So, you better keep your word." She said with a smile.

I chuckled and said, "Don't worry, Remi, I will."

She nodded her head and said, "Good."

We sat there for a while longer, neither of us saying anything.

"Remi, what do you think happens after we die?" I asked.

"I don't know, Sora, but I hope that we're all together again someday."