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Cultivator Battle Royale

Every year, a group of the weakest cultivators in the planet is offered the chance to compete in the Cultivation Battle Royale, a chance for them to rapidly gain power as they defeat other cultivators and risk their lives for valuable herbs, pills, and techniques. Xing Wenghu, The reincarnation of the Immortal 9 Quadrants Chicken Wing Emperor is chosen to enter. Having failed the Thunder Tribulation of moving out of his parents house, he risks life and limb to overtake the other "Bizarre" cultivators he competes against. A satirical parody of many cultivation tropes, stories and characters.

SmilesS · Fantasi
Peringkat tidak cukup
10 Chs

Rise (7)

Fatty Wei had gone off with Feng Peng to preform some special eating training together, in order to accumulate the necessary fat to preform the fat shedding technique.

Xing Wenghu could only hope Feng Peng's stomach would be able to handle all of the food! "Feng Peng my friend, hold on. Your suffering shall soon pay off!"

While hoping that Feng Peng would be able to endure, Xing Wenghu ran into the Jade Beauty that had captured his eyes Maria.

However, he felt something was off.

She was currently leaning against a wall, multiple women surrounding her.

"Oh? What do we have here?"

A woman was standing in front of Maria, taller than her and very cocky. With a arrogant expression upon her face.

Xing Wenghu had recognized this classical scene, played out in several of the manhuas he read. His Jade Beauty was in danger!

But this Heavenly King could feel no fear, a few women were of no concern!

"Hmph. You think you can compare to me huh? Trash women like you could never hold a candle to someone such as I! The Divine Dual Empress of the Dao!"

The woman in front of Maria shouted loudly, for no reason at all. Except to be obnoxious and dramatic. A standard scene amongst cultivators.

Xing Wenghu was very familiar with this type of woman in the upper realms. Loud, annoying and existing only to be face-slapped by him.

He rushed to the defense of his Jade Beauty, placing himself between her and the self proclaimed Empress.

He dared to not be tempted by her appearance, despite how tall and voluptuous she was."Not so fast, harlots!" Xing Wenghu shouted, the self proclaimed empress and her cackling cohorts gasping at his sudden entrance.

"You think that tramp is worth anything? Why don't you drop her for a real woman~"

The Divine Dual Empress of the Dao thought she could work her charms on Xing Wenghu, but he instantly saw through her.

"This junior should stop playing with flat chested girls...And try his hand with a real woman~"

The fox like woman caressed Xing Wenghu's cheek. Maria gasped in fear of what would happen next.

"This can't be happening to me! I'm gonna end up alone...and irrelevant to the plot again..."

Such was the fate of a Jade Beauty, for she could be tossed out on a whim!

However, Xing Wenghu was not a fickle bastard. He took the hand of the self proclaimed Empress, and then slapped her loudly across the face.

"This Heavenly King is not tempted by such meager beauty! Begone!"

Xing Wenghu then shoved her away, and took a ridiculous stance once more. "A man like me, is forever loyal to his woman!!!"

Maria blushed, as Xing Wenghu pressed his advance. "Twenty Trigram, Trash Takeout Technique!!!"

A mysterious aura shined around Xing Wenghu, intimidating the Divine Dao Empress and her companions. She probably had a long and boring backstory.

But she was irrelevant, and he was the main character!

"W-what's this!? You dare!" She took a stance to fight back against him, but what happened next blew her mind.

Xing Wenghu dashed rapidly to her, and poked her in the eye.

She screamed in pain, as Xing Wenghu began to rapidly poke her all over her body. "Two Trigrams! Four Trigrams! Ten Trigrams! Twenty Trigram attack!!!"

For the final attack, Xing Wenghu surprised her not with a poke but a slap instead. "Dual FaceSlap Technique!!!" He shouted with fury in his eyes.

His slaps echoed out across the building, like two claps of thunders across the Divine Dao Empress's face.

Her cohorts gasped, offended by Xing Wenghu's sudden attack. The Divine Dao Empress was sent flying back, caught by her followers.

Xing Wenghu folded his arms, satisfied at his humiliation of her.

"If you mess with me, or anyone I know again. I will unleash the wrath of the heavens one hundred fold!!"

The Divine Dao Empress gasped as her cohorts carried her away "You will regret this, you stupid fool!" she shouted for her final words.

Maria blushed, and clutched Xing Wenghu's arm.

"This man is so reliable, I can't ever think of anyone but him!"

Infatuation blossomed within Maria's heart, as Xing Wenghu simply pat her on the head to reassure her.

"Are you alright?" Xing Wenghu took her hand, attempting to be romantic with it. Maria blushed up from this.

"I-I'm fine..."

She didn't dare to inconvenience Xing Wenghu like this. Xing Wenghu looked her over, and noticed a few bruises.

"She will not last long if I don't lend her a hand, I will need to give her cultivation techniques of her own!' While cultivation pills and special assets that increased cultivation were prohibited within the training facility...

They hadn't said anything about the exchange of techniques!

Xing Wenghu thought back to his memories, sifting through them for a powerful technique to hand onto her.

He gasped in pain and fear.

He was currently remembering the most powerful one he could have given to a woman. Which was given to the harlot that betrayed him in his past life.

"Hmph. No use getting mad at the past whore! I'll give this to Maria, and she won't ever betray me!"

Maria noticed the tense expression on Xing Wenghu's face, and became worried.

"Oh no...I've really troubled him now!"

But Xing Wenghu snapped out of it, and turned to her. "Maria, don't worry. I will transcribe a powerful cultivation technique just for you. And when I am done..."

"No woman will bother you again!" Xing Wenghu boasted. Maria was filled with relief and joy, Xing Wenghu was just so caring and benevolent to her!

"I must take my time to write it carefully Maria. All you will have to do is wait." He was not wrong, a cultivation technique could not be rushed. Even by a prodigy such as him.

"Alright Xing." Maria said with a hint of anxiety in her voice. She was still nervous, and did not want to burden him any further.

However, they were suddenly interrupted by the sound of a worried Feng Peng.

"Master Wenghu!! We have a problem!!!!" He shouted.