Complicated Feelings Part One

Prince Jin's words shook Feng Xi to her core. In her past life, she was very alone. She worked hard to make Tang Zhi happy. She worked hard to make his business grow. But now that she thought about it, there was not even one time after they were married that he showed her any affection. Every night she was alone sleeping in the large bed. And the times she thought she was having intimacy with Tang Zhi it turned out she was being prostituted out!

Feng Xi looked up at the eyes that were staring back at her. In these eyes that showed warmth and love for the person they were looking at, that showed their utmost sincerity towards the person in front of them, filled Feng Xi with unexplainable emotions. She suddenly wondered if it was okay to love again. Was it okay for her to give her all to the man that was holding her in his arms? Was it okay to want to be loved and cared for by this person?

A tear rolled down her cheek. Her emotions were in complete chaos. She was scared. She was scared that if she gave her all to this man she would experience the same things all over again. She could not stop the tears from falling from her eyes.

"Xi'er!?" Prince Jin saw the tears and began to panic thinking that he did something to hurt her.

Prince Jin's voice broke Feng Xi's thoughts. She looked up at the worried concerned face and smiled. "It's nothing. I don't even know why I am crying."

Feng Xi went to wipe her tears only to have a rough finger gently wipe them away for her. The next thing she saw was a handsome face moving closer to hers. She closed her eyes as she felt his moist lips touch her's. She reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck and parted her lips ever so slightly allowing Prince Jin's tongue to invade her mouth. This was not a heavy passionate kiss. It was a kiss that silently expressed the feelings they had for each other deep in their hearts.

Their tongues intertwined as they slowly explored each other's mouths. There was no movement of hands. Prince Jin did not dare to do more than just a kiss. He remembered the day when he had pinned her on the bed and how scared she was at that time. So the most he would do is initiate a kiss. From there it was up to Feng Xi on how much they would do. But he did not mind. This slow kiss that expressed everything was perfectly fine with him. No words were needed. He also knew this was not an everyday thing. He just felt at that time, Feng Xi needed something to hold on to. Something that would allow her to know that he meant everything he said. This is why he kissed her. To show her that I, Prince Jin, am a man who will love you forever.

Neither of them knew how much time had passed. It was not until Ru'er came out to announce that dinner was ready when her words almost got caught in her throat seeing Feng Xi and Prince Jin kissing. "Young Miss..."

At Ru'er's voice, it broke the two out of there daze. Feng Xi shot up from Prince Jin's lap, almost falling over. Her face was so red it seemed you could fry an egg on it. She touched her lips and screamed out in her head: 'What did I just do!?' Not even daring to look at Prince Jin she took off running into the main hall!

Prince Jin smiled warmly as he watched Feng Xi running away. He looked down and clasped the hand that was just holding her waist. "One day, this hand will never let you run away. When that day comes, Xi'er you will be this Prince's Princess Consort and in the future, you will be the one woman that all of China will look up to. The Phoenix that soars through the sky."

Prince Jin got up from his chair, smoothed out his robes, and walked towards the main hall where Ru'er had all the food set out for dinner. He had no intention of leaving until he had eaten dinner with Feng Xi. Feng Xi sat at the table, her cheeks still red slowly eating her food. When she saw Prince Jin walk in she lowered her head and pretended he was not there.

Prince Jin did not mind, he actually found this side of Feng Xi very cute. Ru'er walked in and took up her seat and quietly began to eat. Three people, the only sounds they made were the movements of them eating. Once dinner was done Prince Jin got up without a word and was getting ready to leave.

Feng Xi, suddenly felt nervous because Prince Jin had not said a word to her. Her thoughts once again became a mess. 'Did he hate me now? Is it because I ran away? Is it because I did not speak to him?' But her worries were truly unfounded. Prince Jin only felt that maybe Feng Xi needed some time to get her thoughts in order and did not want to put pressure on her. But if he knew he was causing her even more inner turmoil he would definitely say something to her.

Feng Xi watched as Prince Jin left the room causing her to begin to panic. She did not know why she felt this way. She had thought she decided not to love but seeing him walk away without a word after that kiss she couldn't bear to see him go like this! Everything she held down deep in her heart that she was doing her best to repress suddenly exploded out all at once! She shot up from her chair and ran out of the room chasing after Prince Jin!

Prince Jin had not gone far when Feng Xi charged out of the room and wrapped her arms around his waist. "Wait!"