Failures

​Failures are the main reason for a fucked up life. Life always gives us failures so that we cannot win. But there is something not added to this which is when we try to get back up again and again eventually we will win someday. People win when they get back up infinite times after getting fucked up. People lose when they leave their dream behind after getting fucked up by life. Some people I know had given up their dream even in their first failure. We have to fight back up to succeed in what we dream about. ​The living example of millions of failures is myself. I have been through tons of failures since my childhood. But the one thing I did to overcome my failures was just never quit whatever happens, never quit. Because that is what your shitty life wants you to do. Unless you are strong with your option in changing your life even your ever ending fucked up life cannot stop you from achieving it. ​I have seen what failures can do to you. It even made me paranoid about everything I do, tried to stop me from achieving it but I tried, tried and tried like "I can do this all day" a favorite quote from one of my favorite superheroes. ​Life has fucked me up several times that I cannot even get back up for most of the time, it took me into a different phase known as depression when I wanted to be alone most of the time thinking about my life. Those fucks ups even gave me real life nightmares whenever I think about my fucking future. What am I going to do to change this shitty life I had? ​My very first failure began with my fucking pair of glasses that I need to put on all the time. And because of this shit I lost my chance of getting myself into the army that I have always dreamt of since my childhood. It shattered me. At first I did not take it seriously but with time passing by I felt like I am a fucking failure on the face of this earth. It was devastating until one day I felt that I should move on so I got into two of my favorite majors: biological sciences and computer. Now I am good with my life. As I said when you try to back up you can get what you want. I agree that I had lost my favorite thing in life but I got it with double favorites. That kind of feels good. Trust your instincts they get you to your destination. ​Still that was not the only failure I got, there is a list of failures that I cannot even imagine most of them. The next failure was in the field of music which was once my passion but is now more than that. Initially when I started uploading my songs on YouTube I did not get more views until I decided to wait patiently and upload whatever happens until I get what I want. I don't want the money I need someone who appreciates my work. Initially there was none but now I have some. Still then I got rejected for publishing my works on several audio platforms until I tried harder and harder every time life tried to pull me down into this shit hole. Finally I got my works published on Spotify, Apple music and stuff. ​Even my podcasts got criticized by many until I worked harder and smarter and now I have them published too on Spotify and Apple podcast. It happens to all of us, the failure, but it is on you, you have to work hard and smart to get yourself out of the shit hole that you have been in. It is in your decision whether you decide to stay in this shit hole or fuck back your life and get back up. ​If you are reading this book, my first and second books did not get even the recognition I wanted. I was completely fucked up from the inside but I waited and hoped that someday it will get recognition likewise it got selected for an international competition worth like twenty thousand pounds. ​Everything I do results in failure my first two films that I directed, composed music and acted for did not come out as the first one was not completed and the second one was taken down due to some issues. I love watching movies and I have always wanted to do something in that field but still I can't until one day I got a chance on making a film but this time I tried out something different keeping in mind that at least this one must be a success. As a matter of fact that third one came out and got a good review. Maybe thirds a charm. ​Still it is not over yet even my animated films got rejected initially. However initially it got several good reviews. The same case was in my photography and digital art too. Everything goes wrong in the first place and eventually gives me success. ​The games and apps I created were rejected in the beginning and got bad reviews but I did not stop right there. Rather I fought for myself. I fought until I win and eventually I won. ​Even my studies fucked me up so hard. Because the society we live in does not want our intelligence, they just need marks. It is like marks decide our fucking future. Well that is not entirely true. Students can do more than what they show in their papers. Each and everyone in this society is interested in marks and not interested in student's free will. ​Free will is just a myth, no one gets to live free according to their own terms. Everyone is playing someone else's game. Most of the time we don't want to but are compelled to do so? However I secured around ninety percentage but still that is not needed for society. No one is interested in hearing out my ideas rather they are into my marks, just marks, a piece of paper that some random person made up. We cannot live our own fucking lives until we try to get out of this shithole that we are stuck in. ​Even my gaming channel was pretty much fucked up. I wanted to be like Mr. Beast or Pewdiepie and I tried so hard for that every fucking day but I couldn't. But then my mind grabbed something which was to be myself rather than being someone. I started making unique content, eventually I succeeded with that too. ​Everything I get to do in my life I have come out with lots of failures and a little amount of success too. You just have to wait for your chances to get what you want. Because life is not a bed of roses for all of us but is a bed of needles for probably the most of us. ​Life, society and some a holes want you to be fucked up so hard in life. It is unless you do something everything will be fucked up in your life. ​Some people say failure is the stepping stone to success but that is not entirely true. Failure is something that comes to you, eats you alive, haunts you every second and definitely will fuck you up for sure. But it is in our hands to get back up or get fucked up. ​This failure shit can even get you to a rehab or something. I have seen people into rehab blaming themselves for their failure. But we are not the ones to be blamed for failure but it is this fucking society that is completely controlled by some a hole douchebags who do not understand what we are capable of. ​People say failure is just the lack of success and is completely the fault of us, that we are responsible for the failures. But that's not true failure is because of everything and everyone that crosses paths with us in our life. ​Fight for yourself because no one wants you to win except you. ​Use your failure as the motivation to travel through this hell. Things don't come easily. I am what I am now because I went through failures and took them as a challenge. Win to get what you want because until then life can fuck you up in ways that you cannot even imagine because I have been through this. Every time I had only one thought which is to win. ​Even I know the life of a guy who lost everything because of his fucking failures all the way down. ​Frank is the best example of this case. He was a good guy with several handy talents. He did not know this at the beginning when he started everything he liked of, before getting stuck into the fucking cyclone of failure. ​Frank was a good guy with high intelligence. Everything was good until his high school. On reaching high school, he felt something rushing him and started with his new projects which could have been great inventions for the future world. But the douchebags around him did not think the same. All they wanted was the marks that he could get on a fucking piece of paper. ​So they started rushing him into getting more marks. But he wanted to do something more by contributing to society. He even tried running toward his passion but his family, teachers, friends and the fucking society don't care about what he can do and what he is capable of. They just want him to learn something he is definitely not going to need in his near future or somewhere at the end of his life. ​They just want him to memorize everything rather than learning it. It is this fucking society we live in which just wants marks. ​Due to this Frank was not able to complete what he was destined. He was in two minds, firstly he was not able to concentrate on his studies because that was not wanted by him or needed by him. Secondly, he could not succeed in whatever he does because he did not get any support from society. Now he just landed into a nine to five job with a minimum pay and his life sucks probably. He cannot find time for his passion or his profession that he really wanted. Now he is just into a robotic job and there is no free will for him to live his life to the fullest. ​Then he did not try after that he just settled for what he had thoughts about society and his future. He was quite having fear to take risks. He was not ready to take risks and that is when he failed. If he could have taken some risks he would have succeeded. ​On the contrary if he would have fought for himself when everyone around him denied him, he would have probably changed his life. ​If he had a run for his passion without telling to anyone and tried again and again despite the failures in his early times he could have been what he wanted to become. ​Or even when he had lost everything he could have tried in his free time rather than wasting them or ditching his life wasting time. He would have worked on something to succeed in them maybe. ​It is just that what we need, try to succeed, do not settle for anything, and fight for what we want. If Frank would have done any one of this he would have been succeeded by now. Rather than being stuck in the shithole of his life. ​So win motherfuckers because that is the only way of getting out.