ch.23: picking up the pieces of a broken heart

So it was almost time for my set and I watched Juliet set and she is really good. But I saw Andy dancing and I thought that was funny yet sweet. He was supporting his wife and he is her number one fan. But I think that is cute. But I saw Alexis in the crowd and she was a few people behind to the stage and well I saw her dancing a little and I thought I wonder what is going to happen when she sees me. Meh I could care less.

But Juliet finished and when she walked off Andy gave her a hug and I said, " hey Juliet you were really good." She smiled and said, " thanks Haley. And good luck tonight you will do great." I smiled and said, " thank you." I took a deep breath and violet already helped me set up but she walked to the drum set, and nodded towards me, and I walked out and I heard a few people clapping but I had to tune them out. I just nodded towards violet and she started to play and I followed along.

So our first song was demons awake and I just felt myself get lost. And I was fine with that. But we got through three songs then to careless so I said, " okay, this next song I wrote and I wanted it to be in memory of my mom. And if you have a special someone keep them close to you and never forget them." And I started to play and this was going to be a little touchy for me and I hope people get the message. Not everyone is who they seem. But the things that are said, are sometimes daggers to the heart. I had to do something and I actually played my heart out and i had a few tears fall but I stayed strong and I wasn't going to break. I couldn't. I didn't need to.

But after that we finished that song and then we played picture perfect by escape the fate. And that actually made me cry a little but it was excess tears. But I just kept thinking about her. And I felt my shattered heart stitch back together and I looked over and I saw my mom. I smiled and I felt on top of the world and she walked closer to me and she was just smiling and I felt happy but I still missed her.

I heard her say, " never be scared of letting go. And I will never forget you Haley. I love you." I smiled and looked to the crowd for a second then back and she was gone. But we finished and I was crying so much and I haven't cried like this in so long. It felt good to let everything out. But violet gave me a hug. And walked me off. And I just kept crying and I just needed a little air so I walked to the back of the building and I just slide my back and fell to the ground I then heard a door open and I look to see lex. I was completely shocked but she sat next to me and gave me a hug.

She asked, " Haley it is okay, what happened?" I tried to speak but all I could do was crush her with a hug and me accidentally drenching her shirt with salt water tears. And she just said, " Haley it is okay. I miss her to." I started to shut the flood gates and I perked my head up and said, " lex," I slightly smiled and she said, " yeah, Haley?" I tried to dry my face and eyes and replied, " she is going to be okay." It made me cry a little more but she smiled and said, " yeah she will. She's in a good place." She tried to pick me up and she just gave me another hug. And I just needed a hug. And hugs are the best.

But I heard the door open again. And I look to see violet and Juliet. I slightly smiled and they gave me another hug so this was like a big group hug. But I pulled back, and violet asked, " Haley are you okay?" I nodded slightly, " yeah I am now." I smiled and still had a tear shed, but Alexis said, " violet right?" She nodded yes, " can I talk to you for a moment?" She nodded and I let go of the hug and kept wiping away tears. And Juliet asked, " Haley what happened? Would you like to talk about it?" I slightly nodded sure, and we went back in since it was cold, and I started to explain to her, " well I got to see my mom one last time." And she smiled and said, " that's good right?"

I nodded yes, and said, " yeah. Just I wish she was here." I looked down and shed another tear. Then I saw footsteps come up and I look up to see violet give me a hug. And I just squealed and I heard her say, " I am so sorry Haley." I gave her a hug back. And I take it lex told her what happened. And I then saw Andy come over with cc and Andy wrapped his arm around Juliet and I smiled a little and said, " hey so I am gonna start packing up. So I will see you guys at the next venue."

I walked over to the equipment and I grabbed my guitar and put that back in its case. And grabbed the cord and put that in the little pouch then grabbed the amp. That was really just easy but I walked outside and out the stuff in the back of the trunk and walked back in to get the rest, and then when I was walking in I heard a few talking. " I don't know she never really liked them?" " we could always try. Besides it would be a surprise." " yeah no kidding."

So it was the middle to end of January and it was freezing outside. And this year isn't crazy weather. So back in 2017 the weather went to total shit. And it was hot during one week and freezing the next. But I heard one say, " I don't know do you think he would answer?" There was a pause, " only one way to find out. Do you even know his number" " no, check twitter. And do you know the other phone number?"

" yeah I will use my phone to ask if he could come out here tomorrow." " good then I take it we are going through with the plan." I was wondering what the hell they were talking about but I left and found a way to the other side to make it look like I wasn't eavesdropping. But I grabbed the rest of the equipment. But I shut it and turned around to see violet, I screamed, " oh shit?!" She laughed and said, " at you doing anything tomorrow?" I said, " I was wanting to take you to sprinkles cupcakes. Why?"

She smiled and said, " okay I was just wondering and what is sprinkles cupcakes?" She asked me that and I looked at her gasping like a drama queen. " known for the best cupcakes. Do you like cupcakes?" She nodded, " yeah who wouldn't?" Then I smiled and said. "Okay would you like to go to sprinkles cupcakes tomorrow or this really good food place or both?" She smiled and said, " both please." Okay I will take you tomorrow and you might want to wear something comfortable tomorrow."

So I wanted to take her to my old stomping grounds and I love this one place it has the best vietnamese food. And it is awesome but thanks to my mom and aunt they showed me the place and I fell in love with it. But they also have really good coffee. But I saw Alexis walking out and I yelled to her, " lex, come here for a moment?" She ran over to us and she acted like she just ran a mile. " yes?"

I smiled and said, " I was wondering if you would like to join us on a little adventure to sprinkles tomorrow. And the one food place." Her eyes lit up like fireworks, and said, " please I haven't been there in three years." I looked her shocked and said, " okay well we have a day off tomorrow so do you still live back home?" She nodded no. " no I have a small apartment here. It is on Michigan street. And it is just a block away." I smiled and said, " okay we'll wait what time is it?" Violet Checked her phone and Said, " ten fifty" I thought okay that's not bad but I had to change out of this. But we talked for a little while longer and then I was tired so I just slept in the front seat. And this wouldn't be the first time I have done this. But I was pretty comfortable.