When your boss is yelling and it’s not at you

LJ

Meetings with Ned are basically schedule reminders and approvals of things that we need to vote on, because we never do anything unless we all agree. Then Ned starts to discuss solo activities, usually ending with reminding Burt to try harder to actually do solo activities. And then he scolds us for anything that requires damage control and buttering up the press. He doesn't often need to do that these days, but I was excitedly expecting him to chew Mark's ear off for trending after Popvaganza.

However, he doesn't mention Mark at all. Instead, he looks at Jamie.

"So, Jamie," Ned said in his remember-I'm-still-your-boss tone, "Can you explain what Gangsta of PYD is doing right now?"

Jamie's face was unflinching as he stared blankly at Ned. "Why would I know what he's doing right now?"

Everyone else shifted out of their lazy positions in their seats and leaned forward towards Jamie or Ned or both, yeah, I don't know how but I for one was making sure I saw both their faces at the same time.

"Yeah, what's going on, Ned?" Steve prodded.

"He went on live radio saying he's really inspired by Jamie of Boy Next Door now and wants to learn more from him," Ned doesn't back down from Jamie's staring game. Boss, no, it's impossible to out-stare Jamie, I've tried millions of times.

"That's nice of him," Burt said. Not sure if he's joking. Sometimes it feels like Burt is always joking.

"He says he wants Jamie to teach him how to rap."

"Jame raps in one song." Of course, Mark is offended.

"And he wants to collaborate."

"Ey, world domination, Jame, congratulations," Steve pats his shoulder.

Swear to god, Jamie hasn't blinked this entire time.

"Is there something I should know about, Jamie?" Ned pushed. All four of us held our breaths. Or maybe that was just me, but damn, it felt like it was all of us in the room.

Except Jamie, who sighed and ran his hand up the back of his head. "Maybe he really wants to collaborate, you should ask Mr. Barnes if he thinks it's a good idea. I'm not very keen on it, but maybe if Steve writes and produces."

"Eww, my songs aren't for putrid yucky dickheads," Steve rolled his eyes at Jamie.

"It's gonna go platinum within the day," Jamie pointed out with a shrug.

"Double platinum within the week," Burt added.

"Jamie could go on Ellen," I piped up. I had to be part of this conversation somehow.

"It's too much praise for a stupid radio show," Ned pointed out. "So, are you sure there's nothing I should know about?"

Jamie raised an eyebrow at him. "He's not my type, Ned."

"Aww, Ned, I feel really bad for you," Steve reached over and put his arms around Ned, slapping his shoulders. "You've been trying to get Jamie to admit he's gay for how many years now? You should just give up like the rest of us."

We laughed as Ned glared at Steve, who gamely let go.

"Guys, seriously, I don't care who you're fucking, but I swear it would be so much easier to do damage control when I know." Ned said this a lot in the last ten years. I wondered if he knows he still says it word for word.

I raised my hand.

"Yes, I know yours, LJ, seriously you do this every time."

I chuckled. Maybe he did know.

"If there isn't anything else, I have a mall tour in an hour," Mark said, getting up and handing his phone to Jamie. Oh wait, that's Jamie's phone. Wait, what, Mark was looking at Jamie's phone during the whole meeting? Did Jamie have porn? "So Steve, what time can I drop by tonight to redo Song 6?"

"LJ will finish recording Song 10 at 10, probably," Steve peered at me, implying we'll be done by 10 unless I screw up. I gave him my best Rock Star face. He replied to that by blowing me a kiss.

"Ned, how come you don't try to get Steve to admit he's gay?" Ned was pinching the bridge of his nose instead of answering me, another thing he's done a lot of in the last ten years. To reply for him, Steve stood up and opened his arms wide.

"Because he knows already," Steve said, wriggling his fingers. Mark laughs and gives him a fist bump, then waves at the rest of us before leaving the room.

I was laughing, too. I got up and put my hand on Jamie's shoulder, patting him as inconspicuously as I could. Jame reached his hand up to cover mine and patted me back.

"I have the rest of the day off, right?" Burt said, but didn't need a reply. He was already out the door. I knew where and how he was going to spend the rest of his day. I wish I could do that too.

Honestly, I always thought Jamie was going to be the first one to get married. Jamie loved kids and kids loved him. I swear, I think Burt's kid thinks Jamie is his actual dad, sometimes. Heck, I even think Jamie's my actual dad, sometimes. And my actual mom. Jamie can outnag my mom, and can even outnag Steve's mom. He usually outnags Ned, too.

Ned finally got up, picked up his tablet, and put his stylus in his pocket. "Yes, please go and make us more money," he muttered, taking his ringing phone out of his pocket, answering it while walking out the door.

"Goodbye, boss!" Steve saluted the door.

"I guess he's not buying us lunch, huh?" Jamie snorted.

I turned to them, all excited. "Lunch?"

"Wow, are you paying?" Steve put his arms around me and walked me out the room as I laughed and shook my head. He turned back. "Jame? LJ's buying us lunch."

Jamie slowly got up and followed after us. "Hooray," he said, dryly.