Welcome to The Terror Dome

/Frank POV/

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They weren't all that convinced about me being a nice guy. (Oh come on you guys, as much as I have the knowledge that there's multiple versions of me, you as well should know for a fact that some of us aren't all that terrible in our own rights.) I lied as naturally as I breathed. This, this was a chance to get the Boosted Gear fresh and even stronger than normal. These three weren't an issue even if they worked together.

Issei wasn't all that convinced about me still being a good guy, but thankfully his version of Asia came up to me and Shaked my hand. (Well thank you Miss Argento for placing your trust in me. First and foremost, I'd like to actually get an idea about whatever the fuck it is that I did in your reality. I'm gonna be real with you lot, as much as I have an idea that the other me may be a little touched in the head, it doesn't mean I'll be able to accurately tell what sort of shit "I"have on me.) I gave her my "doubts" as I was getting info straight from the pilot in the dropship, who was also getting info from the commander of the X5 fleet. I should say that this is probably a dumb way to get info, but hey, I'm not smart enough in this situation to really know what I should be doing.

(That's fine sir, my name is Asia Argento, and I have Twilight Healing. And the other version of you took over most of the world via a form of shadow power that made people like puppets of yours.) she said as I was getting confused. Alright, shadow, puppets, what sort of kooky bullshit did the other me ge- no, no no no no no, please don't tell me it's that one. (Did, did the other me make weird hand signs when he was controlling the other people?) I asked her as I was stuttering and edging my cringe from what the other me could have possibly been. (Umm, yes?) she said as she was probably confused about why I asked that specific question.

I fell to the ground completely ORZ style and did my best to wretch out as much of the contents of my stomach as I could. Oh god, the other me went to fucking Naruto. (And, what did he call himself? Shadow Puppeteer or something?) I asked her as she shook her head, oh god it's gonna be worse. (I think the other version of you called himself the "Shadow Monarch". And, well, he kept licking the necks of most of the women that he got his hands on.) she blushed but subsequently had a sad face while I felt genuine disgust.

I was edging an aneurysm at this point.

(I feel like I'm going to hate that version of me, so fucking badly.) I said as I stood up and shouted in psychological pain from the thought of having to fight that sort of version of me. (If I ever fight him, it's gonna be so fucking AIDS, I swear to God.) I said as I looked at them and sighed. (Alright then, where exactly do you all need to go?) I asked them as Issei looked somberly at me as I took a step back. (Bro I get that you're sad and all but please, chill the hell out with looking at me. It feels like I'm about to groped by you.) I joked a little as he grit his teeth before he then calmed the hell down

(Home, we want to go home.) he said as I nodded at the as I pulled out the Yamato, turned around and made a star shaped cut in space as I resheathed the baby. (Well this is a trip to the underworld, I assume that you're all strong enough to handle this sort of payload. Oh and also, be careful when talking to this reality's Rias. She's, quite manipulative of certain people, after all she is a devil.) I said to her as the brown haired lad didn't say a word when I just insulted him. He went through as I immediately went and shut the portal up and looked at the other two girls that were shocked.

(F-Franku-san?) Asia exclaimed in shock as I was elated to finally get a proper specimen of a Longinus. (Holy shit, you cannot make this up. That little sob story of yours is a wild wild hoot I'll say that much girlie.) I chuckled as Irina, finally, Anti remembered her fucking name, went and charged straight at me with the little shard of Excalibur that she was rocking, so I dashed towards her as well, dodged to the left and tripped her over. (Wooh! Yeah baby, that's what I've been waiting for, that's what it's all about!) I said as I then smiled at the handiwork. A free mech, despite us having better tech in general was always welcome, we could use the slight improvements, and a free Boosted Gear! Now that's an actual fucking steal, and I am more than happy to take a dub for that.

(Ah yeah, sorry about that lass. Now I may have lied and stolen your little boyfriend, but don't worry, I just need his Sacred Gear. You know how rare those things even are, and the fact that you literally breached the Dimensional Gap without the issue of a Great Red protecting this reality does mean something you know?) I told her as I put one of my knees on Irina's back to make sure she couldn't get up as I tapped her down for any more tricks up her sleeve. And no, I have not touched her in the naughty spots with malice, she's got gear alright? Gear ain't bad ya know?

Asia was so flabbergasted about it that she was just opening and closing her mouth like a fish. (That means my dear, that someone might have killed Great Red. And it sure as hell wasn't Ophis. No no no my dear, Trihexa is more than released, Trihexa-) I then flared out the Argent as I grew three extra pairs of arms from my back (-is stronger than ever.)

Yeah, suffice to say, she was actually fucking terrified with the fact that the literal creature that God died to make sure it was locked up was currently in front of her, and it was most likely even worse than it's counterpart in her own reality. (Okay then, so, you can't report to anyone, you and Irina can't escape, your boyfriend is pretty much fucking gone, and well, you're screwed. You can't even teleport, because you are a healer. You can't and won't be able to do shit kid. Sorry about making your little boyfriend a personal lab rat, but hey, c'est la vie mon cherie.) I jeered at her one last time as I called the ship to come down and pick me the the two girls who were pretty much in pure fucking despair now.

(Aww what's wrong little baby boo? Didn't anticipate that you'd go out of the frying pan and into the fucking fire? Well, sad to say, you and your boyfriend's luck is shit enough for that to happen. But don't worry, I won't do the unconsented ba thing to you or Irina, that's distasteful for me. No no no, if I want you to despair, I would've made it something rather better than just this. It would be, a much more glamorous end than just me picking you off the ground and throwing you into a prison to rot away.) I patted her back as I threw her to the Orks as she was pretty much non-responsive to anything that I tried to say to her.

Broken that quickly? Oof, that's a big shame. Really a shame. But her healing is a lot better than whatever is needed, plus, she's not the same Asia I gave compassion to. There are many like her, but this reality's? She's a friend, despite her not wanting to talk with me anymore. So yeah, she's hands off, but this one is completely fair game to me. (Make sure she gets to the brig on time. I assume right now that the devils and other beings are thinking about trying to beat my ass up to make me stop blowing everyone on this rock up. That or kill me, whichever they think is the better option here.) I gave my orders as I loaded my Bolter with another round as I aimed at the drop pods and blew them up as well.

(Clean slate to anything that humanity might be able to get their grubby little mitts on. And I genuinely mean that. No more witnessed if they're the type to talk and yap and all that shit. And Weird Boy?) I called out the special Ork as I smiled, patted their shoulder and said (Get that special gauntlet off of the arm of that kid, and make sure that you could get it onto the general, you understand me?) as the Ork smiled widely and nodded to my order. Oh yeah, I'm a OP man trying to make another dude more OP. That's not a stupid thing to do at all.

However I'm thinking about this in a different way. He still has a Falna, I need Hestia's blood to truly make sure his magic is always in tiptop shape, and yet I also require the chant that the gods use to update their "children's" Falna.

Hmm, curiosity strikes again, can I learn the language of the gods and then do the updating myself? Or is there some sort of deified firewall to how the Falna works? Questions questions questions, and yet you people still get no bitches. I'm just kidding with y'all. So, I got back on the dropship and watch the news while playing some Angry Birds, suffice to say, shit is wild in all of the fucking world. The countries are blaming each other for stupid fucking things when they should be focusing on the fact that the crazy superstructure owner is currently aiming a couple giant fucking guns at all of them.

(A/N: Alright as a little reminder, I still use the randomizer for whenever I want to really do something. I got most of the countries locked onto this bitch, their chances are pretty much all equal, and yet it still fucking hit the US. No cap, I tried again, and lady luck decided "I wanna watch them burn a little". Like damn bro.)

(Alright soldier, wanna go and grab some food really quickly? I heard that they serve some potato dishes in this country.) I said as I tried to search up the closest possible food shop that got some fucking fries and mashed potatoes in the vicinity. Dead ass, there was one that was right in front of a police station. I cannot make this shit up, holy fuck, that's fucking hilarious fate, you got the whole squad laughing.😐

And so we flew down to the potato shop as I used the system's autotranslate to make things easier for me to buy some stuff. The fucking staff were terrified, that is, until the cops came in as well. They saw the Orks, they lowered their guns, and looked at me with a very neutral expression. I watched my order get made as I licked my lips while I was still in the Mineta face. Yeah, I was still rocking this stupid ass mug, but don't worry, sometimes, things can be very very retarded as one of the upstart cops really went up to my table and said that I was under arrest. I kept eating as I stared at him straight in the eyes as my mashed potatoes slowly but surely disappeared.

(You don't want this sonny, I'll assure you that much.) I said as I stood up with my soldier as we all left the store to see Japanese soldiers in a firing squad right outside. (Boyz, move them aside will ya?) I asked them as the Orks literally grabbed some of them while they struggled and threw them to a wall. Either their backs are really broken, or they just broke a couple bones, cuz I heard a lot of cracks that aren't fucking from the wall. And that my dear viewers is why you don't try to end up going after the literal war criminal with an army that's capable of doing some real fucking damage to you while they're still eating. They might get real pissed, lose their appetite and then have you and your squad fucking manhandled til you can't even move anymore.

Yeah, sucks right?