Acceptance

Ever since that day, his Majesty's words had been ringing in my ears.

A person's holy name is like their nickname, and usually close friends, lovers and family members are allowed to call someone by their holy name, so it obviously pained me that his highness already began carving me out of Brielle's life.

Since then I hadn't been able to get a good night's rest, as if I ha insomnia. However, the name wasn't the only thing that stayed on my mind.

It was possible that I was hypersensitive towards the concubine considering there were other kingdoms with concubines and Queens that got along. The difference was that the concubine would be from a noble family or at least be acquainted with the Queen in some way. Yet I knew nothing about this concubine. She could have been aiming for the role of concubine from the beginning.

Though I wasn't supposed to see the concubine I had to at least satisfy my curiosity with some answers. During tea time I went to the rose garden since I noticed that she spent most of her time there. And there she was, drinking tea surrounded by a rainbow of roses.

"Lady Beatrice, may I join you?"

Though I asked I didn't want to give her the power to decide. I sat down across from her.

"Your Highness, what brings you out here?"

I hated it when she asked those questions in surprise as if I wasn't free to do these things in my own home.

"I was looking for you. There are a few things I want to ask you before the princess is officially in your care."

"What would you like to know?" She seemed uncomfortable which was understandable. Without a doubt would she be suspicious by my sudden behavior since our history together was conflicting.

"Where did you live before you were brought to the palace?" It was strange that I had known this woman for almost a year but I didn't even know where she came from. If she was a noble her name would have given her family away immediately, but she never introduced herself with her full name. Having heard my question, she paused. Her tea cup almost fell from her frail fingers.

"I lived in a dukedom in Zameria." Her voice trembled.

Why was she being so vague? There were about 20 dukedom's in Zameria. What was she trying to hide?

I could see her hands trembling as she brought the tea towards her lips.

However I couldn't ask her anymore questions since the tea spilled onto her dress. We were both startled when the concubine abruptly stood up from the shock and knocked over the entire table.

"I-I'm so sorry your highness!" She was clearly flustered. The maid next to her inspected the dress and tried to wipe away the spilt tea.

"Don't worry about me. Are you OK? Was the tea hot?" If she was seriously inured I'd get the blame again.

"No, it was already lukewarm, the dress is just wet." She looked disappointed when she saw the spill. "I'm sorry, I need to get changed now." She said as the maid began escorting her out of the garden. I heaved a heavy sigh as I watched her body shrink from the distance.

Later that day in my study his majesty stormed in, I almost jumped in surprise. As I stood up my heart almost jumped out of chest as I felt a sting on my cheek. I immediately covered my cheek with my hand perplexed by what just happened. I looked up at his highness and it was obvious.

He slapped me. But why?!

"What you are suffering now is no where near how much Bea is suffering right now! I heard you interrogated her! And because you intimidated her she burnt her legs!"

I couldn't process the words he was saying. It was like everything that happened was exagerated to make me look like the villain.

"B-but your Majesty!"

"I don't need your excuses, just stay away from her!"

He left me with feelings of hollow regret. Ever since that day I never spoke to the concubine again.

A few years had passed since I last saw the concubine as well as my own daughter. The only time I was able to see Brielle was during her birthday, but even then we would never have the opportunity to talk to each other or be alone in the same room.

By the time she turned 12 she became a very caring girl, with sunshine hair kissed by the heavens and jade green eyes that seemed to reflect an entire forest.

I hated the idea that I missed most of the important moments in her life, even if they were tiny. But what I hated the most was seeing his Majesty, the concubine and Brielle playing together in the garden as if they were a real family.

'What does that make me?!'

"Doesn't the princess look just like lady Beatrice? If I didn't know any better I would have thought Lady Beatrice was the mother."

"Shush, her Highness will hear you(!)" The maid's scurried off as if a predator was after them. I couldn't help but take another look at the perfect family displayed in front of me. I couldn't take anymore. I ran back to my room as fast as my legs could go. I immediately sat in front of my mirror and looked at every inch of my face.

'Am I really that different from my daughter?'

I looked over my flawless skin, the same as Brielle's, my clear green eyes. Were her eyes closer to my eyes or the concubine's? My inky black locks were replaced with amber, the colour of his Majesty's.

'Is there any possibility that Brielle looked more like the concubine than me?'

I dismissed the thought.

No matter what anybody said, Brielle was my baby. Even when the world was against me, it was an undeniable truth. Brielle was my precious daughter but with our looks so similar there was no way she wouldn't know that I am her biological mother.

Since then I continued to tell myself that my daughter resembled me as I looked at my mirror, hoping my looks wouldn't change. Two more years passed and my daughter turned 14. She turned into a Saintess. She was sensitive and cared for everyone, including the maid's and servants in the palace. Everybody in the Kingdom adored her.

She grew up in the blink of an eye, while I missed every moment. There was no way she was my daughter anymore. I never raised her.

Everybody called out 'Princess Celia!' while I could only mumble 'Brielle' under my breath. I was growing old. For most of her life I never existed, so all I could do was let go of her. She was not my daughter anymore.

She belonged to the concubine.

Though the title of 'concubine' didn't suit Lady Beatrice anymore. With what that woman took from me, she seemed more like the queen, while I wasted away with my meaningless title. I couldn't handle knowing that what I had built for most of my life was being stripped away from me in front of my very own eyes.

At least now I didn't have to hold onto someone so desperately to the point where I almost ruined myself. At least at this point I could move on and live out the remainder of my life as a hollow queen, carrying out my duties while the family theater was playing in the background.