Loss

The delivery was tiresome and painful. I was almost in labor for ten hours, and during that time I almost passed out from exhaustion more times than I can count.

Over blurred eyes, I see his majesty receive the baby. He looks at it with no emotion as if it was just a pebble on the side of the road. I have been carrying his child for nine months while he was having fun with the concubine even before I became pregnant, and yet that is the face he makes when he looks at his own blood.

"I'd like to see the baby..."

I heard a whisper from behind his majesty. His Majesty turned from me and gave the baby to the person behind him. Her high-pitched voice seemed familiar, it was almost haunting. I glanced at the person who took a hold of my baby.

My heart shattered.

It was the concubine. The concubine was the person who held my baby before I did. She looked at it as if it were her own. I couldn't stand being in the same room as her, but my exhausted body and atmosphere didn't allow me to say anything. It was only until the baby began to cry, that they let me hold the baby. I didn't even know what it looked like until I had to feed it.

The baby was a healthy girl. She had thin blond hair, which took after his Majesty, as well as big emerald eyes, which looked like mine. It reminded me of the dream I had the morning I found out I was pregnant. Her eyes reminded me of the woman in the wedding dress that I dreamt of, who also burned me at the stake. The dream was too ominous that I couldn't forget it in the nine months I was pregnant. However I couldn't just leave a nightmare like that in my memory, especially when a delicate infant was in my arms.

It had been a few days since the baby's birth and finally it was the day for his Majesty to bestow a name upon her. Of course, instead of consulting me he consulted the concubine about her name. In front of the whole kingdom he announced her name:

Celia Brielle von Zameria.

The middle name was picked by the church as the blessed name. They were cute names, I just wished I had a part in coming up with them. Even though the princess was my baby the concubine would visit her room every day without fail. I only ever heard the maids talking about how she would come in to look at the baby, while the only time I got to see the baby was during feeding time. During the day I would catch up to unfinished work that I missed while I was bed ridden during my pregnancy.

There was only one time when I bumped into the concubine while tending to the baby. I was just about to feed the baby when the concubine came in with the most ridiculous smile on her face. She looked at me awkwardly as I sat where I usually did, next to the crib with the baby in hand. Neither of us moved as if marking our territory. I could tell that the nanny on duty felt conflicted and didn't know how to handle the situation. So I just let her leave since she was of no use at that moment.

"Your majesty, I didn't know you'd be here. Is there something wrong?"

She asked as if it was strange of me to be with my own child. It was as if she was kicking me out of the room.

"Nothing's wrong Lady Beatrice. On the contrary, I'm just feeding my daughter right now."

I wanted to remind her who's home she was in. "But what are you doing here? I didn't know you would visit." I lied. I couldn't let these little visits continue otherwise people would even start to question if I was even the mother of the princess.

"Oh, I visit quite often. I just can't hold myself back, she's just so cute with her chubby, little cheeks and bright smile. Whenever I look at her eyes, they remind me of my own, don't you think?" She smiled shamelessly.

So that was their game. Once the baby doesn't need breast milk anymore I won't have a duty to the child as a mother anymore, since she resembles the the king and his concubine. That could even be the reason why he chose someone with green eyes, though his Majesty wouldn't have known that the baby would even be born with green eyes.

'If the baby was born with blue eyes and black hair would the concubine have lost her purpose? Or would they play ignorant and continue the staging of a happy family.'

I couldn't help but laugh at the thought of those two raising my daughter.

"Don't you dare touch my child ever again. Don't ever visit her again. You already took her name away from me, don't take her life as well." My voice trembled as I put the baby down to rest. I looked at the concubine to see if my word sunk in, but to my surprise she began crying.

"I'm sorry your Majesty, I didn't know you felt that uncomfortable with me around."

How could I not feel uncomfortable with her around. She took my husband and now she wants my child as well.

"I'll try to be better, I'm sorry." I couldn't say anything. She didn't even know what she was apologizing for, so how could I say anything?

Just then the door flung open. His Majesty stepped in. He looked dead ahead at us as he walked in our direction.

"Why is it that whenever I see you two together, Bea is always in tears." He said in a hushed tone, probably being considerate for the sleeping baby, unlike the concubine who almost woke her up with her sobbing. However, I couldn't hold my anxiousness any longer.

"Your Majesty, I would like you to be honest with me."

He seemed perplexed as he tried to console the concubine.

"It is usually unheard of for a concubine to visit a queen's baby as much as Lady Beatrice is doing. So who will have the responsibility of raising Brielle?" I asked though after the final word came out I regretted it. His highness' eyes clouded over as he avoided eye contact with me.

"You'll be busy with your own duties as Queen, so it will be easier for everyone if Bea raises Celia into adulthood."

I took a small glance at the concubine who had completely wiped away her tears, then I looked at Brielle who began tossing and turning in her sleep.

"But what about nursing her-" I was immediately cut off by his highness.

"You will continue to nurse her until she turns two, then that role will be given to Beatrice. You should trust her more if you don't want to be stained a villain from now on."

Without letting me argue back, his Highness began to escort the concubine out of the room. He paused and looked at me with a sharp gaze. "Call her Celia from now on." Those were his final words before he left the room with the concubine.