Chapter Thirty-one

Madison pov

They weren't really lying when they say that ; you can't run or hide from your past, that no matter how hard you tried, it will always find a way to come back to bite you in the ass.

Take me for example. I had naively and stupidly thought that my way of life in high school, all the unforgiving things i did back then, i had naively thought it was no more than a closed chapter in my life. That i have grown and matured, and that was only what really matters.

But never once have i ever forgotten once, that it was just an excuse to to push and forget my shameful past. And what just happened, just felt like fate's way of mocking me that i couldn't be more wrong. That i was only just stupid for me to ever think that way in the first place.

It was just made clear to me that no matter what i tried doing, no matter what i accomplished or sought to accomplish, i would forever remain a stained person. A person who wasn't worthy of redemption or second chances, a person who doesn't deserve happiness, not now, not ever.

After successfully getting out of the hall, not at all concerned about the weird looks and looks of disdain i received from the people and shakily brought out my phone, trying so hard to book a ride, yet failing miserably as i couldn't even see anything with my eyes being so blurry and stinging from all my crying.

I had almost succeeded in booking one, when my phone was pulled out of my hand and i looked to see Gideon standing in front of me, my phone in his hand, looking winded and looking at me with an almost guilty expression.....but why...?

"Gideon...." I whispered shakily and watched as he brought his hand to rest it softly on my cheek and gently wiped my tears...

"Come with me. "he said, gently pulling me along and this time, i went without any resistance though i couldn't shake off the dreadful feeling that shrouded over me.

I didn't know why, but i felt that something really bad was going to happen, that i was going to only get more hurt than i already was. More hurt than i was on our first meeting and i honestly don't want that but i already felt helpless so.....

Gideon brought me to the car park, again. Though i can't really blame him. It really was a private place to stay and talk about stuff that....private.

We soon stopped in the same spot we were before Marcus came looking for us both and he turned to face me, a soft look in his eyes, the same one he showed me when he first came to pick me up, the same one that always makes me feel special somehow.

"What happened there Doll? You just ran out so suddenly. Tell me, did anybody say anything they shouldn't have said to you? " He asked and i shook my head quickly to let him know that that was not the case.

"Then what....? "

"It's....it's...it's not them, it's just that... I think I'm the problem. "i stuttered out tearfully, ashamed and dissapointed in myself. I looked up at Gideon, and saw a request for an explanation in his eyes, an explanation that i had almost started to give, when i suddenly stopped. My inner consciousness had doubts and questions that needed to be satiated, and the only way it could ever be, was by the answers given by him.

So, that was what i did. I asked him the question that has been bothering me ever since i saw Cassie and the rest of them. Because i was now damn sure that Gideon and I meeting, was more than just a coincidence. So with a heavy yet hopeful heart, i mustered up the courage and asked him.

"Gideon.... " I called. And though my voice still very much had traces of tears in it, he could tell that what i wanted to say was serious, almost like he expected it and that was really starting to scare me.

"Please just tell me the truth. You knew didn't you? That Cassie, Lucas, Emily, Tyler and me. You knew.... you knew that we were all class -no, schoolmates. You knew that didn't you? " I asked carefully, hoping with all my heart for him to say 'No. '

"Yes. " He said and i felt my heart starting to break into two.

The 'yes 'sounded so blunt and emotionless that it succeeded in bringing back memories of our first meeting, our first date and honestly, i was really starting to get scared. I couldn't help but wonder where the sweet loving Gideon of the past few days had suddenly disappeared to.

"Since when? "I mustered up the courage to ask

"A day after the date. I thought something wasn't really right, so i did my research and later confronted her after i had done my research. " He admitted, albeit reluctantly.

"And? She told you quite a lot of things didn't she? "

"Yes. She did. "

"And yet you brought me here, with the knowledge about who i was, about the bitch i was back in high school. You brought me here when you know fully well that we aren't on good terms with each other, that there was every freaking possibility that they didn't want to see me. That i might not want to see them at all. And you can still stand there calmly, like you did nothing wrong!!!!!! "

I was shouting right now and receiving lots of attention but i don't really care.

This was betrayal. Absolute betrayal. They all were playing me from the beginning and he didn't even feel remorse, none at all!

"What wrong did I do Madison? "He yelled back. Oh, so it was Madison now?

"Tell me! Yes, yes i brought you here. Yes i knew all about you and the others not really being on good terms. Yes i knew all of that. But what i don't fucking understand is how this has anything to do with the fact that you and i went on a date or later became friends for fuck's sake. "

"It has everything to do with us Gideon, every damn thing. "I yelled back. Tears of betrayal and anger streaming down my face nonstop.

"For goodness sake Gideon! She has everything to do with this! I was there that day remember? I was the one you went on a date with for goodness sake. Even a blind man could tell that you didn't want to be on that date with me, yet you still came, why? "

"Because Cassie begged me to.... she was actually the one who set up the date in the first -"

"There you have it! " I cut him off. "She set me up with you, after seeing my profile, after knowing it was me. I was their classmate for goodness sake, we all were. So what? You think i wasn't aware of every reunion they held since then? Reunions that i was never invited to, reunions that i was only ever made aware of out of spite...? " I asked and he sighed tiredly, as if just being in the same place with me was enough to drain him of all his energy.

"if this is about the reunion Madison... "he started but i cut him off once again.

"You don't get it do you...?" I asked softly, feeling very dissapointed and sad that he didn't even try to see where i was coming from, to see my own side of the story. "They didn't invite me because i clearly wasn't wanted. That was why i was never called to be told about it, except when they were through with whatever they were doing. They all didn't want me anywhere near them, so they never reached out. And trust me, i understood their reasons and respected their decision by staying far away from them as best as i could.....

"They all didn't want a selfish, useless, man chasing bitch around and i respected this -but you! You at least knew all about this, even if it wasn't from the early onset, you still knew. And yet, you brought me here. Why Gideon? To humiliate me? Let me guess, you probably felt wrong for your friends and decided to take revenge on me by playing with my feelings, is that it? Cause that's just what i deserve right.....?

"But you know what? You really didn't have to go that low. You should have still considered me. You should have considered that i am actually a human with feelings, that i can easily get hurt too, you should have considered that before you went that low. But you know what's even more annoying? The fact that i don't blame you at all. It's my fault really. I was the one stupid enough to let you in but i swear, i swear to the one made me that i won't be as stupid as that any longer. "

My voice became more stronger than before and i guess it succeeded in catching his attention, because he finally said something after a long time of keeping quiet.

"wh-what do you mean? " his voice sounded a little shaky, and i felt a perverse sense of satisfaction when I heard it.

"What i mean is Gideon.....this ends here. Whatever sort of relationship or ties we formed over the past few days ends here. I refuse to have any ties to someone who would willingly hurt me for fun. I've had my own fair share of pain and I'm not willing to endure anymore from who i look at as a friend. So, let's say our goodbyes here Gideon, and pretend like none of this ever happened. Let's pretend that we never met each other in the first place. It's the least you can at least do for me if you ever considered me your friend, ever at all. "

"No Doll please wait -where will you even go...? "

"First of all, i go by the name Madison Wells. Not Doll. Please do well to remember that and secondly, I'm going home. To a place far away from you and to a place where i am actually loved and valued as a person and quite honestly, i will really appreciate it if you don't call me, or text me either, seeing as you unfortunately have my number from your so called 'sources. ' Please do me a favor and forget that there was ever a point where we were in each others life. Because i plan on doing that too. "

After my grand 'break up speech', i turned to start leaving when he grabbed hold of my hand, looking rather desperate.

"Do- Madison..... please.... just let me explain -"

"You missed that chance long ago, don't you think? "I asked gently, and just as gently, i removed my hand from his, and started walking in the direction that i could remember as the entrance, thanking my lucky stars for Google Map.

Walking towards the exit, i was finally able to book a ride and i looked perfectly fine, my tears were all dried up and i walked with my head up high but only i could tell the amount of pain i felt as i felt my heart breaking into more than two, it was breaking into pieces. Pieces that i doubt could ever be put together again. It was only after i got into my ordered ride, that i called Breanna to instruct her shakily, to arrange the earliest flight back to Rushville as soon as possible, refusing to give any answer when she had worriedly asked if i was doing okay.

Paying my ride fee, i quickly got out of the car and raced to my hotel room, not even bothering to return the greetings from the hotel staff, i quickly entered my room and it was only then, that i was free and able to break down and express my heartfelt sorrow in heartwrenching and heartbreaking tears, crying out of pity for my stupidity, and naivety. I was such a fool, i was so much a fool.