Promises

Finally I decide to break the silence.

"Vince, please, say something".

"What can I say… you.. someone who never falls under pressure, someone who never lets injustice thrive, and always been able to differentiate between right and wrong. But now you're telling me that you are just going to let those bastard ship you off like cattle?!".

Vince speaks in a way that makes you listen. He tends to do that. In these occasions when he is absolutely serious, he lets you now.

I decide to stand up. My nerves itch under the tense atmosphere. Pacing around the room. Dragging my feet like they are already chained with iron restraints. It is painful to argue with Vince.

"It is not up to me..". I answer.

"TO HELL WITH THEM ALL! WHY ARE YOU LETTING THEM HAVE THEIR WAY!?".

Vince's words echo throughout the room. What does he mean "let them have their way"? He makes it sound like I do this voluntarily. He is pissing me off now.

"Why are you yelling at me?! And why are you saying it like that?! Huh!? Do you think I want to die like this?! Do you think I chose to be treated this way?! Do you think I chose to live like this!?"

Silence again…

It seems like my words got through to him. I know that Vince is only acting this way out of desperation. And he only yells at me because he for some reason believes I will understand him better. I wish I could make him realize that I do understand him. He speaks my mind as well.

He only wants to save his friend, I know that. He thinks I'm letting him lose me. On second thought, maybe I am. The thought made me realize how selfish I'm being. Maybe in actuality, I'm the one who needs to have sympathy for him.

"Sorry", I finally say.

"Thank you for saying those things. They might hurt but you are speaking the truth".

"No Asraa I… I'm sorry. I'm making it seem like it's your fault. It's only… it's only…".

He seems to struggle in finding the words. But I know what he wants to say. I have always had it easier understanding his feelings than he could understand them himself. Ever since we where little we have been by each other's side.

I remember times during swordsmanship training, and Vince would always struggle during sparring. He was too gentle as a child. Always making our trainer angry by hesitating. Never being able to stand up for himself. It would always be me who stepped in when he was being scolded. Now that we are both 22, no longer 8… nothing has changed.

…

It's the morning after…

I am woken up by direct sunlight hitting my face. Me, Vince and Idina all stayed up late talking and drinking tea. Idina was also shocked to find out what was to happen to me. She even cried. Vince was unusually quiet, but that was to be expected.

A firm knocking.

"Come in"

A royal guard. Dressed in blue silk and well polished silver armor steps into my room.

He bows respectfully before saying anything.

"Your highness, third princess. I am here to escort you to breakfast".

I wave my hand at him. Signaling I understand and that I want him to leave.

He bows once again before leaving the room swiftly.

I suppose that everyone in this castle already knows about the deal with Rivesaw. I suspect that the already cold treatment will be even more chilling.

I remove my bed sheets to get out of bed. Raising my arms up to the ceiling in a stretch. The pleasurable sensation makes me grunt.

I walk into my closet. Picking out a set of clothes to wear for breakfast. I chose a light white dress with blue embroidery, as well as a light brown Kashmir shawl.

Idina enters my room. Her eyes still red and swollen from yesterday. She greets me politely before grabbing my clothes I previously chose.

As per usual I walk up to the full length mirror. Removing my sleep wear instinctively.

"Did you sleep well your highness?"

"Yes I did", I answer briefly.

After that Idina is done dressing me. We move on to the dressing table. I request for a loose braid which Idina very skillfully assembles. She would normally be more talkative. But I don't comment on it. At this moment I prefer the silence.

She would always compliment my hair. Saying that it grew longer over night. We both have black hair. But she would point out how my hair is more long and thick. It almost reaches down to my waist.

Outside my door stands the same knight who came to escort me. I tell him that I'm ready and we begin walking towards the dining hall.

Maidservants and butlers pass by me in haste. It is always very stressful for them in the morning. Soft footsteps fill this dreadful castle, servants walking on expensive carpet with dirtied shoes.

I walk unannounced into the dining hall. A fancy breakfast has already been served. I take my assigned seat next to my sisters. My father and mother already eating with divine etiquette.

A light soup, probably mushroom, is pre-served at my seat. I have little appetite but still manage to pick up the silver spoon in front of me.

No one speaks a word for the remaining mealtime.

…

It all looks the same.

It will probably look the same even when I'm gone.

The place of my childhood. Birds who sing songs of spring. Innocently chirping with not a single though on what it even means to be a bird.

My mind has always been plagued by an uncontrollable storm. It is to the point of getting used to it. When the world constantly spins around you, eventually you learn to move along with it.

It was always my dream to leave. To leave alongside Idina and Vince and never look back. But now, I'm even robbed of my privilege to dream this dream. It has become impossible.

As I continue my walk through the garden I spot my older sister.

Aviv, second princess of Arving.

She walks towards me. It is clear that she is aiming for me.

I stop. If she wants to talk to me she will have to walk up to me. Stubbornly I cross my arms and stand firmly in the garden pathway. Surrounded by well nursed flowers and grass so green. Not a single weed managed to survive the gardeners.

"I have been looking for you"

"The guards said that I was most likely to find you here. I didn't know that you enjoyed nature this much sister". She scuffs. Gently caressing the red roses growing on a thorny bush.

I say nothing. It is clear that she came to me with a goal in mind. I have no intention of dragging out this meeting.

"Actually… I wish I knew you better".

Lies.

She continues to keep her focus on the roses while speaking to me.

"When I become queen".

"I don't feel like hearing it", I quickly say in protest.

"When I become queen all of this will come to an end". She says it with an expression so serious. Clenching her fist that just seconds ago very gently where petting roses.

"Huh?"

"No more of this, that is my promise to you".

She turns around. Plucks one of the roses as she walks away.

I'm left speechless. Never before have I had such a puzzling encounter with Aviv. She has only ever done things to harm me. But now she proposes promises. Promises that so deeply contradicts the very image I have of her.

She was the one claiming to not knowing me. But it seems like I am the one who doesn't quite understand her.