Grim_Reaper_4508
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If you want an ALPHA FEMALE MC with Plot , this is the one .This Ruby is the best protag for me , she is a ruthless killer , tries to gain strength and be the top of the world and never hesitates to end the lives which is extremely rare . The best part is she never tried to be the hero , she has best goals in my opinion.
YOU REALLY NEED TO WORK ON YOUR WRITING. TRY USING GRAMMARLSY OR THE LIKE. ALSO, REMEMBER TO CAP THE NAMES. AND IF YOU WANTED HER TO BE OVERPOWERED, JUST GIVE HER POWERS SIMPLY. DON'T ADD TWO BROTHERS OR WHATEVER, THAT JUST MADE IT FEEL CRINGEY. I MEAN IT WOULD BE GOOD IF YOU HAVE DONE THAT NICELY. BUT LIKE THIS, IT BECAME MARY SUE. TRUST ME, I KNOW. I HAVE BEEN WRITITING MARY SUES FOR A LONG.
I read all of the 9 currently released chapters before making this review. I usually like RWBY fanfics but your main character and their goals feel wrong for me, but that's a matter of taste. The story itself has a good plotline with the only problems in writing being a number of reoccurring grammatical errors. Overall, a good story so far, but not for me. (Β°^Β°)7 Keep writing and you'll do well.
loving the story so far it's actually quite intriguing but if it was me I would have asked the dark God for a gift as well as the light. Already gave you one yeah the dark God gave Ruby Soul destroying eye but I would have made it so that he gave her a Grimm form because that is a beautiful concept and we barely find any stories with it but then again that's just my opinion but good job on the story I liked it