Truth

The backyard and the front yard are connected in a big circle around the house and the tree Julie's coming from is on a steeper hill, viewed from both sides. Regardless of this particular scene, her stepmother knows Julie's favorite place and so she could observe her while enjoying a fruitful discussion with her mother and sister in law Claire. Julie was there with them when grandmother spelled her name, and it made her look in an odd way. Claire looked at her and kept holding her and asking if she's okay. Repeatedly, she held her and whispered to her, 'are you okay', 'where are you', 'are you here?'. Julie was confused, was she hearing the right words? Why isn't her mother-in-law reacting, smiling again with her grandmother? Why is no one looking at me but her, Claire? What do you want Claire? Why do I need to look at that picture across the hallway again? I know he's dead. Wasn't he dead? Who is that person?. Claire is pushing Julie against the fences, she tries to shake Julie as if she wants her to remember something. Or is she?

Father finally comes, and Claire stopped the intense question and went to a usual conversation with the father. Julie was suddenly in the chair watching her parents while laughing about how fat the little farmer's kid has become. Julie doesn't remember what you remember. Julie does remember what she made with her blocks. The name of something that tries to surface but cannot. Something is pushing it away. Every time Julie tries to remember that name, she gets flashbacks of her aunt Claire, looking into her eyes and asking her something with a faded sound.

Claire, is a rich woman, inside and out, being able to afford the most freedom out of all of her family. She owns a strong household and does business in retail, and leads the business across different cities and villages. But her rich status comes mainly from her character. A tough attitude and a convincing soul, since she convinced her brother to marry Julie's stepmother. Not that Julie knows of, but Claire's toughness can be seen through her eyes as the book that baby saw. Claire is a reliable person, but a character that is evolved past ours is an intimidating thing. Another emotion block we channel when establishing a relation to others, ones that has a different say in choices made. The other, an entity of reasoning that surpasses our way of looking through life. Someone else, with the same starting emotion blocks and a different way of sorting them. While we view ourselves from the point of character, a line becomes the set of characters that have different sorters, different souls, constructing a block in a way. This line is the outcome of the connection between these characters and makes through connecting between them a square called society. This latter is the law that rules how further choices may be made. A similar representation of this fact is the culture. and so every society crosses other societies and they become a cube, then a tesseract, which represents humanity through time.

Claire had a little secret, one small secret, that only Julie knows of, because Julie has seen it, and no one else did. Something that could be intimidating to Claire. But Julie doesn't know about this fact, she only has enough evolved thinking process to deduce that Claire is reliable but intimidating. However through that small secret, lurks an underworld creature, but Julie is pure and innocent. She discovered that asking is a pleasant thing, and knows nothing about it. Something deprived her of that book, and she didn't know who until she met Claire. She was looking at her parents, her stepmother, then she said, out of curiosity,

' Where's Eigrene? '

It's an innocent question, she asked for someone, she knew her name and she knew who she was. But they didn't know, they didn't see it the same way. her stepmother smiles, always looked at her grandmother and smiled, did she smile again? Her father, the strong and honest man, did he ever smile? What about the grandmother, the gentle person that was the first person to hold Julie's body, in that psychiatry clinic.

Flashbacks occur and we believe that the thing we're looking at happened before, and it is right and true if out eyes processed the usual in a different way. the past presents an issue in our present whenever we say, ' I've seen that before', 'something sounds familiar'. But Julie is pure, Julie didn't purposely ruin this picture, she isn't responsible for other's choices. She always relied on her parents, from the moment she remembers seeing them, because, whenever she did, she looked at that white wall, and fell asleep.

But she knows that the question was there because she wanted to get back the usual satisfaction, of reading a book. This question could be very well the first choice she expressed. This is the first time she showcased herself. Except, the way we see things are different from what really happens. Nobody knew about that person, that name was forbidden in the family, nobody knew about it, other than Claire, because she hid it well, really well under the pillow. No family member is supposed to know about that secret. Those first name the baby came up with, that baby inside the walls, that learned to walk and talk and read under the age of two. The product of two people that shouldn't exist and one of the things the square of society forbids. That baby spelled the words the moment she saw them, then she fell asleep and before long, she became a girl with thoughts, before long she had a name and a parent. But, she wasn't as pure as Julie, nor as Innocent, because that baby didn't have people imposing choices to her. She only knew herself, and the white wall. But the only aunt Claire knew of her, of her existence.

Claire went to Julie's chair, broke its leg, and started punching her, she looked at her and punched her. She kept punching her, Julie was frightened of Claire but she didn't scream, she kept looking at the stepmother. She looked back and had a smirk on her face, while the father was looking down. Then the grandmother walked away, and so did both of them while watching Julie getting beat up, eyes, then the nose, then cheek. She felt every pain but didn't react. Because she wasn't there, she isn't there. All she hears is 'Wake up..'.

She was beaten up, not a muscle working, she kept crawling to one place.

White room, white walls, and a big mattress. The scent was green that smelled like any clinic would be. Julie woke up in a hospital, bruises all over her face and her legs, she looked to see if her parents are there for her. But no one was there. A nurse came by to see the child's eyes finally popping out. 'You're finally awake.. ' 'I'll call your aunt, she is worried about you'.

In confusion, Julie stops questioning, and just look around this white room, this white scent. It does remind her of the dreams she had, but inside she started opening up to the environment around her. It felt more real to her, it wasn't coming from her side of the story. Usual but an unfamiliar view, following up the coming of the notorious figure that she felt as if she was doing something to her in the dream. By the time Aunt Claire came to Julie's room, it faded. And that underworld secret surfaced once more. ' How are you my sweet kid, I'm so sorry for what happened ' she said it while holding Julie in tears. And moments after, the shock started clocking through Julie's amnesia. The feeling of that vehicle rushing through her heart as she almost seen her parents in blood well, drowning and screaming for her help. Julie stayed in a shock as her aunt held her, in tears. She kept hugging her and slightly giving back that shaking feeling back into her. ' you'll be alright dove, I'll take you under my wing. I'm your family and I will always be'. Julie started understanding how the situation in real life came as. But she doesn't know how it came to be in the first place. She feels that her parents aren't going to be in the picture with her anymore. In addition to looking to her aunt, and suddenly feeling that her aunt is going to be the only one person she could rely on. After she lost two. Truth is that part of the emotion blocks, that takes time to sink into subconsciousness, during which its elements are cut from the character. Truth is always the thing that's new and uncomfortable, that sinks and becomes a reality to us. Aunt Claire kept holding Julie and kissing her forehead. After a while, she went away and left Julie alone in her white room. Julie's truth is to rely on this person, in which no choice is made but to get with it. This makes her heart wave, firstly from the loss of the ones responsible for her weight and secondly, from the gain of reliable person that makes her think for herself more. She is lying in the bed looking at the ceiling while reminiscing every detail she has in memories. What is she supposed to feel? What is right ? .. is what happened necessarily to ask? Julie cannot ask that question because it will hurt. The only escape she has is in looking through the ceiling and counting how many times the painted wall was scarred. Sixty-three times. Each time she looks she listens to one of her thoughts when it gets to that question she looks for another scar. Till the sixty-third time. Where something started making sense. Hope, that one word she was digging for was found. Maybe her parents went away, but her memory of them is nowhere before the two years. It's pleasant when we can hope, maybe through her aunt, she can read under that tree without asking. Maybe she could walk without looking at someone else's eyes. 'it's been thirteen days and twenty minutes since this patient was in the coma, it is a miracle to see her coming back to life doctor! ' ' truly a miracle, but the expenses of her staying costs a fortune. You do know it would've been the end of her had you taken her to a different clinic. '

' Yes doctor, I understand and I'm willing to pay ' replies aunt Claire.

' very well, you need to write in the following papers. '

Julie is not alone in this universe, the power of family is that it constructs a line. A line that holds the others or pushes the others inside of it, the line could also be a curve where there is a point that is the maximum and holds power for everyone to benefit from. For Julie, hope was born the moment she was born in a family where such a point exists. Fortunate, luck and destiny live under the same hood when the power of choices comes from powerful people.

The truth is, Julie feels guilt. Whenever she remembers that name. She doesn't understand why would it bear guilt inside of her. But that guilt was never in those sixty-three times she looked up. It was buried inside her and ignored, as much as that question was ignored.

Aunt Claire came to her, later that day and told her that she is going to be living with them from now on. Julie stepped out of that white room, she had clothes freshened up for her, she got out and looked at a long black limousine, finally getting sun rays through her googly eyes, she was staring at her aunt as she held her scarf and smoke the last part of her cigar. They entered the luxurious car, and Julie lost sight of the truth. In time she was with her parents, at the same time she was in a hospital, in another she was reading under the tree. Inside the car, Claire was smiling, then she was talking through her phone, the usual business with the usual face. She was serious then normal then happy.

She acts exactly according to her character, which is not something one does when faced by the truth.

So what is her truth?

What is the truth?