Life Ain't Always Beautiful

As their shift ended, Alex said to Allie, "How about just one drink? You can pick my brain to review some things, and I'd be willing to give you some off-the-books training. "

"I'm not sure that's a clever idea."

"Oh, come on. I'll keep my hands to myself," he promised.

"Yeah, but I don't want you to, and therein lies the problem," Allie said under her breath. Alex wasn't sure if she had really said what he thought he heard her say.

"Come on. I want to get to know who I'm riding with. I promise I won't ask any Marine Corps questions."

"Lilac," Allie blurted.

"What?"

"My favorite color is lilac."

"Okay..." Alex said, confused.

"If we don't talk about my time in the Corps, the only thing left is what's your favorite color is. Mine is lilac. What's yours?"

"I like red. I'm Latino. Kind of goes with the territory."

"Well, there ya have it. Nice talk, Alvarez," Allie said, patting him on the shoulder.

He watched her walk away. God, she has an incredible ass.

********************************************************************

That night, Allie walked into Muldoon's on E. 185th and sat at the bar. It was an Irish pub with a casual, friendly atmosphere and hearty food and drink. The TV showed only American and Irish sports- if it wasn't live, it was a replay. Dark wood furnishings and cozy seating areas made the atmosphere rustic and traditional. It was a place to lay back and relax without stress or pretension.

"Charlie, right?"

"That is correct. And you are three shots of Jose Cuervo and a Bud Light Platinum."

"That is correct," Allie said with a smile.

"You have a beautiful smile if you don't mind me saying."

Still smiling, Allie replied, "I don't mind at all. I'll take a compliment or whatever you have to give."

Allie had been at the bar for about an hour and a half and was nine shots and four beers in. She was mindlessly scrolling through her phone when a scent filled her nose, immediately making her smile.

"Charlie, can I have one more round? Then I should get going. I'm about done for the day."

"Sure thing, Allie, with the beautiful smile." the bartender flirted.

"Charlie, I'm going to tip you, so you don't need to lay it on so thick."

"Her ass isn't bad either, Charlie."

Allie didn't even have to turn around. "Alvarez."

"How did you know?" he asked.

She turned to face him. "I sat in the car with you for eight hours and inhaled your cologne the entire time. So, when you walked in, I smelled you, and I love it. Now, why are you here?"

"To drink. It's the same reason you are. And you love my cologne, huh?"

"Well, I have already had a lot, so you and your cologne need to sit AAAALL the way down at the other end of the bar," she said, pointing.

"Awe, come on, Kingston. I don't want to drink alone. Let me buy you a round, and then I will move AAAALL the way down there if you still want me to," he said.

Allie looked at him. She finished the shots Charlie had just put down. Then, she thought about it and knew she should say no, but she tried anyway. "Alvarez. I don't think that it's a good---"

He cut her off. "When we aren't at work, you can call me Alex," he said.

"Okay, Alex, I am going to be honest with you."

Charlie put down three more shots and a beer.

"I didn't order these."

"No, he did," Charlie said.

Alex smiled wide at her. Allie took all three one after another and then drained the beer. She had just done six shots in fifteen minutes, and she was now highly drunk. "Alex, thank you. I appreciate it. Now I am going to go," she said, leaning on the bar for support. Charlie, check, please."

Allie grabbed her phone to request an Uber. "Damn it. What the fuck does none available in my area mean?!" she said, annoyed.

"That means you should stay and have another drink with me."

"Fine. Sit down." Alex slid into the stool next to her.

"Yay!" he said in a boyish tone.

That made Allie laugh out loud. She could do nothing but take him in. This man next to her was incredibly attractive. His deep brown eyes, smell, and dark, naturally curled hair made him stand out. He took pride in his appearance. She could see why he would easily seduce a woman. He was doing an excellent job working his magic on her, but she was not entirely sure that's what he was doing. Maybe he was just being nice. He wouldn't try anything while I was in training.

"What exactly are you wearing?"

"It's called Surface by Aramis," he said.

She leaned over close to him and inhaled deeply. "Wow. That is very... What's the word I'm looking for? "

"Manly?" he asked with a coy grin.

"Enticing. It's very enticing," Allie said, taking another deep inhale. "Tell me about yourself, Alex Alvarez, my FTO, my superior, whom I definitely cannot have any kind of relationship with, no matter how good he smells."

Alex took a shot of bourbon and drank down a bottle of Corona. "I have three sisters and four brothers. My parents are Catholic."

"Yeah, no shit?" she said with a laugh.

"Charlie, can I have some water?" She put her credit card on the bar.

"Why don't I get it for you? A reward for the ass you kicked today," he said.

"I have had fourteen shots and five beers; I think I should reward myself."

He put his hands up in surrender. "Alright. I'm not going to argue with you."

He looked at her and studied her face. She had the most beautiful eyes. They were gray with just the right amount of blue, like storm clouds rolling in over a clear blue sky. Her nose was perfectly straight, upturned, and on the medium side. It was not significant, not small- exactly right. Her lips were beautiful. He wanted to kiss them so badly. She was so stunning.

"Do you ever wear your hair down, Allie?"

"On occasion. If I have something special to go to," she said.

"Can I see you with it down?"

"Is this a special occasion?"

"Yes. Incredibly special."

"Why would that be?" Allie asked.

"Nobody got shot. Shots were fired but didn't hit anyone. So, we should celebrate."

She studied his face for a moment. She was so attracted to him. "Sure, why not."

She reached up and removed the numerous bobby pins from her hair, releasing the tight bun. Her hair untwisted and fell down her back. She raked her fingers through it. It was long and was the color of wheat ready to be harvested.

"Wow, I didn't realize your hair was so long. God, it's beautiful," he said. "I bet it's soft. It smells really good." She looked at him, his chestnut-brown eyes staring at her. "Do you know why I said I wanted to be reassigned, Kingston?"

"Same reason I should ask to be reassigned," she said.

"And why is that?"

"You tell me first, Alvarez."

"Because I am extremely attracted to you. Because all I can think of since the minute I first saw you is undressing you and hearing you call out my name in pleasure. It's your turn."

"Because I am extremely attracted to you, and I want you to lay me down and make me call out your name," she said, playing with a shot glass. 

Alex reached up and swept Allie's hair behind her ear. His fingertips brushed her skin. She shivered. "Are you cold?"

"No. I just haven't been touched that way in a while," she said.

"How long is a while?"

"Too long. Lost count. I normally don't let people in this close."

"How can it be that long?" he asked.

"I was hurt. I had love, and then it was ripped away from me in less than a second. Twice."

"Oh, Allie, I am so sorry."

A tear ran down her cheek. She quickly wiped it away. "Look, I need to go. I'm not joking, though. I think I need to be reassigned to another FTO."

"If you get reassigned, then what?" Then I wouldn't feel guilty about fucking the living shit out of you.

They just sat there and stared at each other for several seconds. It felt like no one else was there; they were alone in this noisy bar, surrounded by strangers. He put his hand on her neck, his fingers tangled in her hair. The feeling made her close her eyes and soak in his touch. She reached around and put her hand on top of his.

Alex looked around the bar. He didn't recognize anyone amongst the two dozen people there. He leaned in. She kept her eyes closed and could feel him moving closer. She interlocked her fingers with his. "Alex," she whispered. Before she could say anything else, his lips were on hers. Allie felt every muscle in her body relax. It was like she was melting into a puddle of wax. She kissed him back. It was slow and sensual. Every inch of her skin had exploded into goosebumps. He took his other hand and cupped her cheek. Just as quickly as it started, Allie realized what they were doing and gently pulled away.

"As much as I would love to do this, we can't. It wouldn't be professional."

"We are two consenting adults. We can be mature for eight hours a day," he argued. His face turned concerned. "I thought you got shot today. When I saw you were okay, I took you into my arms, and it took every ounce of self-control not to kiss you. I really like you, Allie."

"You barely know me." She looked into his eyes.

"Lilac," he whispered.

"What?"

"Your favorite color is lilac. I know everything that doesn't involve your time in the Corps."

"Nice. That was a good one."

"Yeah. Did you see what I did there?" He smiled and laughed.

"If we get found out, you can get busted down. I've been in this position before," Allie said.

"Then, just for one night only. I can tell you really need this. Use me, Alexsandra. Please, dear God, use me. I need to know what you feel like, even if it's only once." He kissed her again, his time hungrier. Their tongues wrestled around with each other.

"Come on. Let me at least take you home. You'll be waiting a while for an Uber." His words made her twitch and hunger for him to feel her.

"OK. Take me home, help me up my four flights of stairs, and that's all."

"Okay," he agreed.

****************************************************************************

Allie paid for her tab and left the bar. She could barely walk straight, so Alex helped her stay on her feet for half a block. "Okay, this is taking too long," Alex scooped her up like a bride on her wedding day. He carried her the other half of the block. "Here we go," he said, unlocking the door of a candy-apple red Chevy Silverado.

"I see you do like red," she said.

He put her into the front seat, climbed in, and started the truck. "So, where do you live?"

"Umm. I'm not sure."

"You're not sure? " he asked, confused.

"I think it's... umm. Damn it. I have only lived there for three months."

"Is it on your license?" he asked.

"I haven't got an Ohio license yet."

"How were you going to get home?"

"I was going to drink less and remember more," she said with a smile.

"Why don't I just take you back to my place? We can get up early, and maybe by morning, you can give me your address."

"Sounds like a plan to me," she slurred.

Suddenly overcome with tiredness, Allie lay down on the truck bench, the top of her head against his thigh.

He rubbed her arm. "You, okay?" he asked.

"I'm a little intoxicated."

"Doesn't take a breathalyzer to figure that out."

"You know Alvarez. You are extremely hot. Like panty-dropping hot."

"Thanks," he said with a smile.

"And you smell incredible." She sat up and moved close to him, putting her face close to his neck. For the second time tonight, she took a long drag of his scent. "You have the cutest little ears," she said. She took his ear lobe and nibbled on it gently.

"Oh, that's a danger zone, Allie."

She ran her hand up his inner thigh till she made contact with the bulge in his jeans. "Oh, I see what you mean. I like the way that feels. I would like to feel that," she said.

After that, she didn't stop. She continued playing with his ear and ran her hand up and down his inner thigh. "Hey, Alex," she whispered in his ear.

"Yes." His tone was breathy. He was enjoying the feeling of her touching him. She whispered something into his ear. His cheeks flushed. "I wouldn't stop you," he said.

Allie reached down, unbuttoned, and unzipped his jeans. She ran her hand over him a little more. He clicked the steering column of the truck up. He lifted his hips upward, and she yanked at his jeans. She pulled them off just far enough for her to free his erection. He was good-sized, about 10 inches rock hard. She put his head in her mouth. She gave it a suck and a little tug. She heard him inhale. She took a couple of inches into her mouth. Again, she sucked and gave it a couple of tugs with just the suction he had on it. She started back at the top and slid it into her mouth as far as possible. She had it so deep in her throat Alex had no idea how she was doing it.

She must not have a gag reflex, he thought. She was sliding her mouth up and down its length. He could hear her. She was slurping; it was a wet, sloppy sound. It was an erotic sound. "Oh, fuck Allie. Oh my God." He put one hand on the back of her head as it bobbed up and down. She swished it around in her mouth. He felt it on the inside of her cheeks, the back of his throat, her tongue dancing around it.

He pulled his truck into his driveway and put it in park. He closed his eyes and put his head back on the rest. His mouth was agape. He was in a state of ecstasy. "Allie, we're at my house," he said, his eyes still closed, his head still on the headrest. She took him out of her mouth. She slid off the bench and scrunched herself into the. She pressed the button on the side, and the seat moved. She put it back as far as it would go.

"Move over," she said.

Alex wriggled, scrunched, and moved out from behind the wheel over to the passenger side of the bench. Allie tugged his jeans further down his legs. She ran her hands over his muscular thighs.

"You have nice legs," she looked up at him. "You have a very nice everything."

She ran her fingernails gently on his inner thigh. He moved his pelvis towards her face. She took him in her hand and gently slid his head under her chin. Along her lips, she touched her cheek. Alex looked at her and watched. Her face was relaxed, and her eyes were closed. His head was exceptionally sensitive, and he could feel the texture of her skin. It was a wonderful feeling. No one had ever taken time to touch him like that. It was always just suck, pump, suck, cum.

She kissed it softly. She ran her tongue along the underside of his head around in a circle. She held him in her hand. He was rock hard and throbbing. Her tongue flattened firmly on the underside of his cock. She licked his entire length.

"Ahhh. Oooo yeah," he was moaning. "You are amazing at this. I have never had someone take such diligent care of my cock."

Again, he put his hand on her head as she bobbed it again up and down. She licked it all the way down and put his balls in her mouth. She sucked, she licked, he moaned, and his breathing staggered. She took him back into her mouth and started sucking him again, moving increasingly faster. He knew he was going to come soon.

Suddenly, she stopped. With Alex still firmly in her grasp and cuddled between her lips, she grunted once, twice. The third was followed by heavy breathing. He looked down at her. Her eyes had rolled back into her head. He realized that she had orgasmed. The sound of it was muffled by him in her mouth. Her pants were unbuttoned, and she had been playing with herself. He had never experienced anything like that. Salacious.

She just came while giving me head. This girl is unbelievable.

She immediately began again. She was bobbing and sucking even faster, which became too much for him. It was as if a ball of energy had formed in his brain. He felt the energy shoot inside of his body. It came from his head, traveling down his neck, through his broad chest, his heart contracting, down his abdomen where it gathered strength, and it exploded out of him. "FUCK HOLY SHIT! SUCK IT BABY! MY COCK LOVES YOUR MOUTH." His voice filled the truck.

She didn't move or stop; she continued with her hand and lips wrapped around him. She took in the enormous load of hot cum without hesitating. It flowed from him into her mouth and cheeks, with a small amount dribbling down her lower lip. There was so much she had to swallow twice. She sucked on him to remove every last drop. She then licked him up and down. She gently slid him out of her mouth and looked up at him. He was already looking at her. She licked her lips. He was biting her bottom lip in a flirtatious manner. Her eyes were sultry. The truck had become uncomfortably hot. He put his hand under her chin.

"That was mind-numbingly luscious. Did you come while you were pleasuring me?" Alex asked. She looked at him coyly and gave a little smile.

"Maybe." He watched as she slid her hand from the front of her jeans.

"That is so fucking hot."

"I have never done that before," she said.

He opened the door, and a rush of cool air came into the cab. She climbed out of the truck. He shimmied his pants back up to his hips, grabbed his keys, and exited through the passenger door.

"Time for bed?" she asked.

"Oh, I am definitely taking you to bed. Come on."

***************************************************************************

He took her hand, and they headed into the house. They went around the side, and he opened the door. It led into the kitchen, and she thought she smelled cinnamon.

"You have a very nice home," she said.

"And it kind of smells like cinnamon."

"Yeah, I like it. It would be better if I had a beautiful wife and family to share it with. And I made cinnamon rolls this morning."

"You don't exactly look like the cinnamon roll type. Not with that body."

"That would mean you are not the cinnamon roll type either." He smiled. "Not with that body."

"I've popped open a can of cinnamon rolls in my day."

"Popped open a can? Oh no, no, no."

He went to the counter and opened a large Tupperware. He removed the large roll and tore off a piece. Then he came back to Allie. "Put my cinnamon roll in your mouth," he said with a small laugh and a smile. She parted her lips. He took a small piece and put it in her mouth. Her eyes lit up when the sweet taste hit her tongue. She chewed it slowly, savoring the flavors and textures.

"No offense, Alex, but this is the best thing I have ever put into my mouth."

He laughed. "None taken Cara Mia. The look on your face is priceless."

"Did you make these? Like flour, eggs, sugar, roll them out yourself?"

"I did. I have been told I am a fairly good baker and can cook. Mi Madre and Abuela taught me well."

"Fairly is putting it mildly. Next time you talk to Madre and Abuela, tell them they did an amazing job. " What more lies beneath that tough exterior, Alexander Alvarez?."

"Wouldn't you like to find out?"

She took the rest of the roll from his hand and popped it into her mouth. "So good, " she said.

He watched her as she looked around and took in her surroundings. "Is this your family?" she asked. She had approached one of the many photos on the living room wall. Alex came up behind her and put his arms around her waist, pulling her close.

"Si. That 's mi Madre Carmella. Mi padre Salvatore. Mis hermanas, Catherine, Sarah, Michelle. Mis hermanos, Diego, Mateo, Gabriel y Nicky. Esta es mi abuela, Angelina y mi abuelo, Santoro."

"You have a beautiful family. A huge, beautiful family."

He kissed her on the cheek. "Like I said, Catholics. Y tu familiar?"

"My family? I don't have a family anymore," she said. He turned her around to look at her.

"¿Qué quiere decir?"

"What I mean is my family is gone. They died when I was in the military. I was stationed halfway around the world, and while I was gone, they died in an accident. I think I have an aunt in Wisconsin or something. If so, I never met her."

"Allie, I'm so sorry," he said, running the back of his hand on her cheek.

She closed her eyes and felt his hand on her skin. "It is what it is."

"It is what it is? Allie, you shouldn't be lonely. No one should be."

"I'm not lonely; I'm alone. There's a difference. Now, what is going on here?" She turned back around and pointed at another photo.

"That would be my high school's production of Fiddler on the Roof. I was Lazar Wolf, the butcher."

"You sing too! Wow, you are a catch."

"I hope you brought your mitt. How about you? What was high school like for you?"

"I went to six different high schools. I would be lucky if I could participate in a bake sale. I couldn't commit to anything. Relationships and extracurricular activities I couldn't do any of them. I never had an actual boyfriend. I tried. I had three relationships. One lasted five months, one three, and the longest was six and a half, which counts two months during the summer. After a while, I just stopped. I didn't try anymore," she said.

"That sounds so lonely."

She walked around the living room's perimeter, looking at the other photos. She stopped at one and stared. "What is this?"

"Prom. God, look how young I was. I hated that haircut. She made me get it cut that way. She was a tad controlling."

"I was supposed to go to my prom my senior year. The captain of the football team asked me. He was a shoo-in for prom king. I was so excited. My dress was beautiful. It made me feel like a princess. Then, a week before, my dad came home to tell us that he had been reassigned again, and We were moving to France. I had four weeks of life left before I was going to enter boot camp. All I wanted was this one thing—just this little thing for me and myself. I hated my dad. I hated him until I was told he and my mom and brother had died. Then I just hated myself."

The lump in her throat was hard. She began to sniff. A tear ran down her cheek. "The dress was stunning," she said, her voice cracking.

The tears fell one after another. She kept her face stoic. The only sign she was in pain was the drops streaking their way down her face. She touched the photo of him in a tuxedo, standing next to a pretty girl in a pink taffeta dress with a matching corsage tied to her wrist.

"I just wanted to be a normal girl for one night. I wanted to slow dance, eat bad chicken, and maybe get voted prom queen. Just one night."

Alex stood behind her. He didn't know what to do, and he didn't want to say anything wrong. He reached out for her, then pulled back. 

He took his cell phone out of his pocket. She heard the music and turned. "Dance with me, Alexsandra." She took his hand and let him pull her tight into his chest.

'Life ain't always beautiful.

Sometimes it's just plain hard.

Life can knock you down. It can break your heart

Life ain't always beautiful

You think you're on your way

And it's just a dead-end road at the end of the day.

But the struggles make you stronger

And the changes make you wise.

And happiness has its own way of taking its sweet time

Yeah, life ain't always beautiful

Tears will fall sometimes.

Life ain't always beautiful but it's a beautiful ride.'

Gary Allan sang to them. Her tears fell on his shirt. Allie let go, burying her face into his chest. They stopped swaying. They stood there still, him holding her as tightly as he could. She was letting out a decade's worth of stress and emotion: her parents, her little brother, her first real love, and the pain of losing them all. Alex felt her getting heavier the harder she wept. He lowered them both to the floor. Alex knelt and held her as she sank onto the floor. He kissed her on the top of her head. Her hair smelled like cherries. He could feel the wet spot on his shirt made by her tears clinging to his chest right over his heart. The music continued to play. The two partners sat there for several minutes, and she slowly calmed down. Alex patiently let her take her time. He had nowhere to be and an overwhelming feeling of protection for her. He stroked her hair and kissed the top of her head.

"I am so embarrassed. Look at me blubbering like a girl sitting on the steps at prom."

"Yeah, my sister always said it's not an actual high school function until a girl is in the bathroom with three of her friends crying while her friends call her date a fucking idiot who doesn't deserve her."

"I don't think I even had three friends in high school."

"I had a lot of friends, and you know what? I talk to maybe three of them, four at the most. You'll make friends with some of the guys in the department. You have over a thousand coworkers to choose from. And you'll always have me. I'm not going anywhere."

"Don't say that. You have no idea how often someone has said that to me, and they're no longer here."

"I'll try my damnedest to stay in your life as long as you'll have me."

"We can never be together," she said, sniffling.

"Why would you say that?"

"Because I'm not good enough for you."