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schlatt half jokes

schlatt half jokes

The Three-and-a-Half Years Old Baby is Pampered by Eight Uncles!

The Three-and-a-Half Years Old Baby is Pampered by Eight Uncles!

On a cold winter day, Yun Bao, who was already unconscious, was kicked out of the house by her biological father. "You're so evil at such a young age. You pushed your stepmother down the stairs. Now, the baby in her stomach is gone. Are you happy now? Why didn't I strangle you when you were born? You bring bad luck to this family!" Her father exclaimed before beating her up harshly. Yun Bao, who was only three-and-a-half years old, couldn't take it and collapse on the snowy ground. Just as she was about to die, her eight uncles made it in time to save her! Did she nearly freeze in the snow? Was she about to lose her life after being beaten up? Did people accuse her of hurting her stepmother's baby? Did she cause her mother's death and her father's bankruptcy Faced with all these negative rumors, her eight uncles chuckled. "Doesn't he enjoy hurting others? Turn off all the air-conditioners in the house. Let them stand outside for the entire night!" Her first uncle said. "Doesn't he enjoy hitting others? Give me the sack. I'm going to ease up the tension in his muscles," her second uncle said. "What does imminent bankruptcy mean? I'll make him bankrupt right away!" Her third uncle exclaimed. As for the miscarriage? It wasn't even real! Yun Bao's grandfather found out the truth and tossed the evidence to her jerk of a father. He also taught him a lesson with his walking stick. After being beaten up by his ex-wife's family, Yun Bao's father refused to back down. He said to himself, "That bitch brings bad luck to everyone in her life. They won't have a good life!" However, after Yun Bao returned to her mother's side of the family, not only did her uncles' lives not worsen, but they kept getting better and better. Even her grandmother, who had been bedridden for the longest time, recovered and was able to get onto her feet again. One day, a dominant CEO who appeared out of nowhere adopted her. Her entire family pampered her like a princess!
Urban
461 Chs
Love Journal - As Told By An Emotionally Constipated Half-Genius

Love Journal - As Told By An Emotionally Constipated Half-Genius

At age 10, Scarlet Liu Xiu Wen was tested with a Mensa IQ of 156. By age 12, she was publishing books with the pen name Permanent Frost. By age 14, she was a successful vocalist-composer in the band called Britannia. By age 16 Scarlet had a successful career as a model and actress going by the stage name of Liu Xiu Wen. However, there was a secret that the world didn't know. Away from the limelight, Scarlet took on yet another persona online as Pirate S - the eccentric half-genius. Everyone who lurked in the forums knew her name. Known for her unusual takes on life and mostly popularly for her "Human Observation Diary" blog, Scarlet enjoys the nerd life in secret. Human Observation Diary has always kept to a very standard format but one day, a reader pointed out that the blog has recently been differing from its usual format. Intrigued by the trigger, Scarlet investigates her latest human observation - an online NEET by the name of Jedd77. From further interactions, Scarlet finds herself helplessly drawn to him. As their friendship develops into something more, Scarlet has to make a choice. To give up her secrecy and allow Jedd77 to be a part of her life? Or continue the game of cat and mouse even after the face reveal. Note: Slow progress. Talks of some darker topics in life eg: Depression, PTSD, adoption and acceptance. Drama seekers, toxic bitches and overly-sensitive folks who cannot chillax not welcomed. Author also has indemnity to typo, grammar mistakes and English bugs throughout the story. You have been warned. Proceed with caution and enjoy. *** Special chapter release on other milestones, check out my discord and patreon for more details, thank you for the support! Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/destinyaitsuji Kofi: Ko-fi.com/destinyaitsuji Discord: https://discord.gg/UrtDMXn
Urban
277 Chs
A Half Conjurer

A Half Conjurer

ADD TO LIBRARY! Orion Trudger is a common college student at University. He is living in an apartment, has some nice friends, has a decent-paying job at restaurants where he enjoys working till late at night to get money to pay all of his bills. But one fateful night, he accidentally discovers that the world is not the same as he used to think, when he finds out his friendly, drunk landlord is a Vampire. Things don't help him much when he pokes his head more inside this invisible curtain separating the Hidden world. He finds out that not only Gods exist but other things like Mages, Conjurers, Werewolves, Demons, Dragons, etc. But his Excitement of discovering the Hidden world soon turns into horror when he realizes that All of these supernatural are now on the hunt to kill him. Well, not All as it seems. He became 'Wanted Man' in the magical community, the day he discovered that it exists in reality, not some myth. Reasons he doesn't know, he is suddenly running for his life and somehow finds himself in the Land of Tokyo. His good wishers or what he thinks them as wants him to start his new life there but looks like Hunt is still on. Follow Orion Trudger on his journey through discovering and embracing the Hidden world. Is He just a normal guy who accidentally discovered this hidden world or is he drawn to it for something else entirely? Follow him in this cruel, changing deceptive Magic World where for some reason everyone wants to kill him. P.S- Happy Reading...... P.P.S- The cover art is not mine, if you are not happy with it then you can contact me through comments or review. I will take it down immediately.
Urban
256 Chs
What are some good carson x schlatt fanfic stories?
One popular 'carson x schlatt fanfic' might be those that focus on their friendship adventures. For example, a story where they embark on a wacky road trip together, facing various comical situations along the way.
2 answers
2024-11-22 21:09
Where can I find carson x schlatt fanfic?
Another place to look could be Wattpad. Although it has a wide variety of content, with some searching using the right tags like 'carson x schlatt', you may come across some interesting fanfics.
1 answer
2024-11-23 09:14
Do you recommend stories that look scary in the first half, like ghost stories, but are jokes in the second half?
The first half of the book is full of suspense and horror elements, but the second half also has some humorous plots. Overall, it's very interesting. I hope you like this fairy's recommendation. Muah ~๐Ÿ˜—
1 answer
2025-03-05 02:55
Collecting jokes and funny jokes?
Of course, I can collect some funny stories and jokes for you. Here are some examples: 1 A man went to the movies and realized he had watched too much, so he said,"I can tell this movie is so bad." Another said,"No, you just heard all the rhythms." 2 A man said to his girlfriend,"I like you a little." His girlfriend said,"So much?" I don't have any." The man said,"No, I just like your smile." 3 A man asked his girlfriend,"You have a little blue eyes." His girlfriend said,"Yes, I ordered blue glasses." The man said,"No, I'm just saying that I have blue eyes and you have blue glasses." 4 When a man heard that he often chatted with a young man, he said,"I think the coolest thing about young people is that they are a little fat." The subject said," No, the coolest thing is to experience some surprises." The guy said," No, you're not as cool as me. I've been through some of the coolest things, like being thought of as a princess." A man asked his girlfriend,"What do you like about me?" His girlfriend said,"I like the way you talk to me." The man said,"No, what I like is that you can understand me." I hope these jokes can help you satisfy your needs!
1 answer
2024-09-17 01:22
Half-awake, half-awake, half-awake, half
The Mandarin lyrics of " Between Half Dream and Half Wake " are as follows: " In between half dream and half wake, we cross time and space to meet each other. Every minute changes into a year. How much lingering can we have? In between half dream and half wake, we forget that there is still tomorrow. We forget to keep a little time so that this feeling will last forever. When we open our eyes, you are already gone. When we wake up, we will return to the dream, and the dream will no longer be connected... Loving you is like a dream, like it is real. In the blink of an eye, the dream will no longer be connected." The novel " Dream Chaser's Half Dream Residence " is equally exciting. Everyone is welcome to click and read it!
1 answer
2026-01-31 14:21
Animal jokes
In the search results provided, there were some funny stories about animals, including jokes about cows, snakes, frogs, camels, bees, butterflies, elephants, chickens, donkeys, cats, mice, foxes, squirrels, and other animals. These jokes described the conversations and interactions between animals in a humorous way, bringing some joy and entertainment to people. However, because the search results were incomplete, they could not provide specific joke content.
1 answer
2025-01-06 23:00
Collect 50 jokes!
๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚
1 answer
2025-03-11 15:43
Collect 50 jokes!
If I die, the first thing I'll say is, I finally don't have to be afraid of ghosts. A man walked into a bar and ordered a drink. After a few sips, he said to the waiter,"Sorry, I'm not suitable for this kind of wine." The waiter replied,"You're not suitable for this wine because you've been eliminated by this bar." If you do well in the exam, it's all because of your deskmate. 4 "When you were young, did you often tell your parents that you were an alien?" "No, if I tell them I'm an alien, they won't ask me so many strange questions." A bear hugged a rabbit and said,"You are my baby." The rabbit looked at the carrot in the bear's hand and said,"I am not only your baby but also your big carrot." A man was trapped on an island. He caught a bird and a rabbit and prepared to cook them into a delicious meal. So he put the bird and the rabbit in the same cage and began to roast them. After a while, the bird was cooked, but the rabbit was still moving. The man thought,"The rabbit is so small that it won't be roasted to death." In the end, the rabbit was left cold by him. A boy confessed to a girl, and the girl rejected him, saying,"I'm already past that age." The boy asked,"What age are you now?" "I've already rejected that age group," the girl replied. If you do well in the exam, it's all because of your deskmate. A man was trapped on an island. He caught a bird and a rabbit and prepared to cook them into a delicious meal. So he put the bird and the rabbit in the same cage and began to roast them. After a while, the bird was cooked, but the rabbit was still moving. The man thought,"The rabbit is so small that it won't be roasted to death." In the end, the rabbit was left cold by him. If you do well in the exam, it's all because of your deskmate. A man walked into a bar and ordered a drink. After a few sips, he said to the waiter,"Sorry, I'm not suitable for this kind of wine." The waiter replied,"You're not suitable for this wine because you've been eliminated by this bar." A bear hugged a rabbit and said,"You are my baby." The rabbit looked at the carrot in the bear's hand and said,"I am not only your baby but also your big carrot." If I die, the first thing I will say is, I finally don't have to be afraid of ghosts. If you do well in the exam, it's all because of your deskmate. A man walked into a bar and ordered a drink. After a few sips, he said to the waiter,"Sorry, I'm not suitable for this kind of wine." The waiter replied,"You're not suitable for this wine because you've been eliminated by this bar." If you do well in the exam, it's all because of your deskmate. A man was trapped on an island. He caught a bird and a rabbit and prepared to cook them into a delicious meal. So he put the bird and the rabbit in the same cage and began to roast them. After a while, the bird was cooked, but the rabbit was still moving. The man thought,"The rabbit is so small that it won't be roasted to death." In the end, the rabbit was left cold by him. If you do well in the exam, it's all because of your deskmate. A bear hugged a rabbit and said,"You are my baby." The rabbit looked at the carrot in the bear's hand and said,"I am not only your baby but also your big carrot." If I die, the first thing I will say is, I finally don't have to be afraid of ghosts. If you do well in the exam, it's all because of your deskmate. A man walked into a bar and ordered a drink. After a few sips, he said to the waiter,"Sorry, I'm not suitable for this kind of wine." The waiter replied,"You're not suitable for this wine because you've been eliminated by this bar." If you do well in the exam, it's all because of your deskmate. A bear hugged a rabbit and said,"You are my baby." The rabbit looked at the carrot in the bear's hand and said,"I am not only your baby but also your big carrot." If you do well in the exam, it's all because of your deskmate. A man was trapped on an island. He caught a bird and a rabbit and prepared to cook them into a delicious meal. So he put the bird and the rabbit in the same cage and began to roast them. After a while, the bird was cooked, but the rabbit was still moving. The man thought,"The rabbit is so small that it won't be roasted to death." In the end, the rabbit was left cold by him.
1 answer
2025-03-08 20:42
15 funny jokes
1. There was a roommate who was known as an " inventor " who invented a " farts prevention artifact." He said that after farting, he could transfer the smell of fart to someone else by shouting," What's burnt?" He tried it but it didn't work. He was almost chased out of the house by his mother. 2. Her mother was an " artist " in the culinary world. She was obsessed with cooking and followed the tutorial. The person who encouraged the mother bravely went to pick up the crab, but the crab caught the chopsticks. 3. When she was on a blind date, she talked about her childhood with her partner. She said that her poor father used to ride an electric bike to pick her up. Now that her life was better, her father gave her an electric bike and bought her another one. The girl's face darkened when she heard that. 4. The air stewardess introduced by the neighbor's auntie had asked for her income and property as soon as she met. She was asked," Why don't you go to heaven?" The girl elegantly replied that she was off today. 5. Her best friend usually took selfies. One day, she was reading a book and said that in order to avoid aesthetic fatigue, she wanted to be an "Internet celebrity" with a cultural background. 6. Seeing a couple quarreling, the boy laughed and the girl cried in her arms. In the end, she was slapped by her girlfriend. 7. She watched a horror movie with her cousin and scared him into thinking that the female ghost would crawl out. He said," You're already married. Of course you'll give it to me." 8. His wife acted coquettishly and asked for a princess hug. After she was carried, she said that it felt like she was carrying a bucket of pure water. 9. When she applied for the job, she said she had eight years of sales experience and CET-9 English. When she introduced herself, she said," Hello, boss, my name is Little Junjun. Where could he dig the potatoes? He dug in the potato field, and each time he dug, he would get a sack. i'm fine thank youใ€‚โ€In the end, he was hired. 10. His friend was slow to pay for the bill, so he said that he would pay for it himself. 11. At night, when she saw the delivery boy delivering food, she felt that she had a reason to eat when others were still eating so late at night. 12. When the husband came home from a business trip, he heard the commotion and saw his wife running to the bathroom. He thought that something was wrong and pushed the person he saw from the window down. In the end, it was the air conditioner repair man. 13. Xiao Li was in the gym. The treadmill was turned to the maximum, but she still walked slowly after she got on it. 14. His throat was inflamed and he couldn't speak. The leader asked him to make up the numbers to participate in the chorus competition. After he was cured, he was blamed by the leader for losing the competition. 15. When he was young, he had the habit of turning his head suddenly when walking at night. Ten years later, he became a tango dance teacher.
1 answer
2026-03-23 19:30
Hogwarts jokes
Here are a few jokes about Hogwarts: - Some people joked that they were soaked in water because they didn't receive the Hogwarts notice. They imagined that the owl would encounter an accident on the way to deliver the notice. For example, the little owl fell into the water, its wings were wet, and it couldn't fly. It could only float by buoyancy, and it could only fly again when it was dry on the shore. Therefore, some people joked that Hogwarts 'next batch of notices should be waterproof. - There were a lot of interesting and imaginative jokes that began with "If China students went to Hogwarts (New Year's Eve)","If Hogwarts opened in the northeast","If Hogwarts had social software","If Harry Potter's character was a video blogger", etc. These jokes created a sense of humor and novelty by combining the magical world of Hogwarts with different real elements or strange situations. - "Does Hogwarts accept China?" This was a humorous question. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone was not enough. Everyone, please click to read the novel!
1 answer
2026-03-14 23:35
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