I felt that I was redundant at home, and my values conflicted with my family. Many times, I felt that I couldn't communicate and was very tired. I didn't know what to do.

My family has my parents, my brother, and me. My brother and I are nine years apart. My father is not at home all year round, and my mother works in Hong Kong, Taiwan, and Hong Kong. When I was young, the neighbors around me often told me that I was not my parents 'biological son and that my mother had picked me up. My mother was very angry and told me not to believe them. The cousins around me never treated me well, causing me to be very lonely in my childhood. When I was in junior high school, my brother drank too much and told me about my background. That day, he seemed to have cried out the grievances that he had held back for more than ten years. I said that they were not good to me no matter what. It turned out that I was a child of unknown origin. I was not good-looking and did not like to talk. It turned out that I was brought up by my aunt. My mother earned money in Hong Kong and Macau and gave her living expenses. However, my aunt was a gambling addict. Many a time, I did not have enough to eat. At night, when she gambled, I often picked up things on the ground. So I was only skin and bones. Later, I was brought home. At that time, I was about 10 years old. I didn't like to talk in an unfamiliar environment. In addition, my cousins rejected me, so I became even more withdrawn. "Later, when I grew up and was now 20 years old, my mother didn't know that I already knew that I wasn't a child of this family. My brother used to be very good, but after he was tricked into doing multi-level marketing, he changed completely. I even had my sister-in-law and nephew. My brother's family was a family that relied on the old. They were the kind that always asked my mother for money. Moreover, the amount was not small every time. Sometimes, they couldn't even take out a few dozen yuan. I would tell my mother that a loving mother would spoil her son. I really couldn't indulge my brother like this. After giving me the money, you complained to me that I raised you guys so much, will you repay me? I love my mother very much. I tell her everything. She said that she was biased towards me, but I don't think so. Why does she always let my brother take care of his parents? "I really hate my brother now. He's in debt and only wants money. His values are not in harmony with mine. I don't have much happiness in this family, but I think it's already very good. My brother's credit record isn't very good, so he hasn't been to Hong Kong, Taiwan, or Hong Kong. However, my mother said that my brother's family of three will go with me next year after getting the documents. I'm not willing. No matter how bad my brother is, no matter how much he relies on his parents, he is still the biological son of this family, and he is the only child. I am just a person of unknown origin. I don't think I can fit into this family. "I can't stand people who rely on their elders and have poor moral character. My brother is like this now. He likes to take advantage of small things. If we all go to my mother's place, he will definitely spend more money than he needs to. My mother's burden is a little big. Now that their family of three has to take care of a child, it will definitely be very troublesome. My mother is also soft-hearted and a good person, but she is really annoying. Every time she gives my brother money, she hopes that he can support him in the future." My brother is already 30 years old, but he has never given a single cent to my parents. He is still in debt. The money to give birth to a child and marry a wife was given by my parents. My parents seem to have aged 20 years in the past two years. I really can't bear to see them. After that, she would always call him 'your mother'. I can't count on your brother anymore. I'll be counting on you in the future. You have to be successful. I've always put my mother in my heart. I hope to live a carefree life with my mother in the future. Although I can't say that I'll be rich in the future, I have the confidence to support my mother. I hope that I can always live with this grateful heart, even if I'm lonely. I'm thinking that if I go to Hong Kong, Taiwan, and Hong Kong with my brother's family in the future, I'll feel like I'm redundant. It's their first time going, and Mom will definitely take them to the place I went for the first time. I'll feel a little uncomfortable. I'm very selfish. I want to monopolize Mom's love because I have nothing but Mom. If they all went, my mother's attention would definitely not be on me but on my nephew. Just thinking about it made me feel bad. After all, I was just a child who was lucky enough to be picked up by my mother. I couldn't expect anything. I hoped to leave home and have my other half. I wanted to have a warm and happy family. If my mother was willing to live with us, then it would be fine. I wanted to have a family. I really wanted to.

Answer 1

I feel that I'm redundant at home and my values conflict with my family. Many times, I feel that I can't communicate with them. I'm very tired. I don't know what to do. I can refer to the following suggestions:
1 Try to communicate: Communication is the key to resolving conflicts. Try to sit down with your family and honestly express your thoughts and feelings. Listen to their opinions and try to find common ground. Pay attention to avoid using offensive language or attitude during the communication process and try to maintain a good communication atmosphere.
2. Understand your family: Try to understand your family's situation and values. Understanding their positions and backgrounds might allow them to better understand their views and find better ways to communicate.
3. Seek external help: If there is a serious conflict of values with your family and you are unable to communicate effectively, you can consider seeking external help such as a counselor or family psychiatrist. They can provide effective advice and support to help themselves and their families find better solutions.
Accept reality: Sometimes we can't change our family's values and standpoints. If you have tried many methods but the situation has not improved, you may need to accept reality and try to find other ways to communicate and communicate. For example, they could establish closer ties with their families or seek support and help from other support systems.
Family and values are a very important part of our lives. Although conflict and disagreement are inevitable, we can overcome these obstacles and find better solutions through communication and understanding.