The last night

Colin

I open my eyes and see that my dad is watching me.

His eyes are red, glowing with so much anger, and the first thought that comes to my mind is that he is angry with me.

I don't know what transpired between them, but something is wrong.

"Dad," I mutter quietly.

His eyes are still open, but it is almost like he is not looking at me like he is deep in thought.

With trembling hands, I reach out to him, and this snaps him out of his thoughts. His eyes dim and he looks at me, then nuzzles my hand where I placed it on his face.

"Who is this girl and who is this guy you think you are meant to be with.''

He is talking about Lowell and Ash.

"Dad,--'' he glares at me immediately and I know that look. He wants me to tell him the truth and nothing else.

I take a deep breath as I think of the best way to say this, even though, deep down, I know there is no better way to say this.

"Ashina Hemming.''

The words leave my lips and it makes it all feel real. This is by far the one thing that I don't want to make a reality. The more I say it, the more I think about it. The wronger it all seems.

His eyes widen in shock, and I can just imagine the thoughts rummaging through his mind at this moment.

"Fuck,'' he exclaims, with so much defeat in his tone.

I already know that he doesn't want this for me.

He doesn't want any involvement with the shadow pack, but that is not what is even important right now. The fact that I want her brother will make him think the worst of me.

"Dad, I am sorry." I breathed out an apology.

"Why are you sorry?'' he asks.

I don't know.

"I am a disappointment."

"You have never been a disappointment. You will never be a disappointment to me, son. Are you a hundred percent sure that you don't want her? Are you sure about that at least? "

I nod.

"My wolf wants her."

I watch him as he runs his hands through his hair at my revelation, "That makes no fucking sense. You are supposed to be one with him. This is a lot more than I can understand.''

"I am sorry,'' I apologise again and this time, he glares at me to stop me. "Stop apologising to me, you have done nothing wrong."

I didn't expect him to be on my side.

I don't expect anyone to be on my side.

"You like her brother?'' he asks.

I freeze at his words, wondering how he knew.

"I don't know what I feel for him, I don't know anything,'' I cry, covering my face with my hands.

I feel him as he slowly uncovers my face. "I need to talk to Alby and Blue. I need to figure out what is going on, but this is not your fault. This is not on you. "

His words should make me feel better, and maybe at this moment, they do, but I still feel like shit. I still feel so detached from my wolf.

I still feel alone.

***************************

I spend the rest of the days in my room. The best thing I can do is avoid everyone and everything. Tala tried to bring me out of the bubble I put myself in, but I know that if I see Lo if I am even in the same vicinity as him, I would want to hold him, I would want to kiss him. I have been unable to think about anything but him.

It almost feels like I am losing my mind.

The door opens and Colm walks into the room, with a girl behind him. I know what this means, but I don't need this right now.

"I need the room for a couple of hours," he tells me pleadingly.

The girl looks everywhere but at me.

I stand up from the bed and put on a pair of sneakers. "I'll just crash with T,'' I tell him as I walk out of the room.

I go in the direction of Tala's room, which is further down the hall. I knock on her door anxiously, in hopes that she is inside. The door is locked.

Grabbing my phone from my pocket, I dialled her number. "Where are you?" I ask her immediately and she answers.

"Yo, what's up?"

"Where are you?''

"Out swimming with a bunch of people. You want to come to join us?''

"No, I tried getting into your room, but it's locked."

"Shit, I took the key with me. I just got paranoid when I couldn't find my charger. I believe it was stolen, but my dads seem to think it is all in my head. "

I sigh out of frustration.

"You can come to get it. It's in my bag. "

"Who is there with you?''

"Don't worry, no one from the shadow pack is here. Just get here quickly." She ends the call before I can respond, and I walk out of the building to get her key.

Once outside, the sun hits me soothingly.

I haven't been out in days and it feels nice. Shifting my gaze around the compound, I notice that it is empty. People are probably having lunch or swimming. I just hope I will not bump into any of the Hemmings. Once we get back to the community, Dad said we would figure things out. I just have to make sure that I avoid both of them for the time being.

My wolf has been pretty silent.

I don't know what transpired between my dad and him, but it is scarier not knowing what he is thinking. I keep walking until I hear the sounds of people by the springs. I spot Tala immediately, and she waves me over with a smile. She is dressed in a black bikini and her hair is wet and up in a messy bun.

"Over there,'' she points to her bag, and I walk over to it as she comes out of the water and to me. She pulls me into her arms as I get her keys. "I have missed you, brother,'' she exclaims, "It feels like I haven't seen you in forever."

Unlike me, Tala wants to be outside, she wants to mingle. She has a lot to look forward to, and there is nothing wrong with that. Tala is beautiful, and she never lacks male attention.

"I should go back inside.''

She shakes her head, grabbing my hands in hers, "Stay with me. Tonight is the last night here. Say goodbye to everyone.''

"I cant."

She sighs in defeat as she slowly lets go of me "Okay, I'll see you inside?''

I nod as I leave her and the fun that everyone seems to be having.

Fuck my life.