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Peacefully Retiring in this Wonderful World (Konosuba - FGO)

[Disclaimer]-This story is fanfiction. The copyright of source materials belongs to their respective owners. Please support the official release! [Warning]-This story is rated M (MA) due to contents such as gores, profanities, violence, smut, and so on. If your age is less than 18-years-old, please consider skipping this story. Be responsible for your choice. You have been warned. Thank you for reading this warning! P.S- posting this for fun and also this affronted fanfic is not mine I'm just posting this here in Webnovel. [Original Fanfic Author]-https://forum.questionablequesting.com/members/silver-w-king.76/ [Original Site]-https://forum.questionablequesting.com/threads/the-silver-box-in-the-attic-snippets-and-story-ideas-thread.3018/page-31#post-3470449

TheEternalWanderer · 漫画同人
分數不夠
45 Chs

Chapter 8

Darkness started training after Michael and Aqua left her right away.

The gift that her new comrade, party leader, and hopefully friend, had given her was truly exquisite.

The first few hours she spend training with the enchanted sword were frustrating--A denial play in a sense--however she kept working on her stance, posture of her arm and wrists, along with the force of the swing, till eventually, finally...

Darkness slashed downward and the sword spoke.

[Trash]

"Hmmph!"

It came!

The condemnation, the scolding! The tone and inflection were just perfect. There was just sheer disappointment at how much she sucked at sword play, was conveyed very clearly and was hitting her just right.

"Sorry~, I'll do better."

Darkness blushed after saying that, as she just spoke to a sword like it was a person. She looked around to find no one in the area she was currently at. So, it should be fine if she were to pretend that Michael was there watching over her training, with his eyes filled with contempt as he looked down on her.

"Hmmph!" She shivered just from the thought and got back to training.

She kept practicing, repeating that one move, over and over and over. Just like Michael said: "The person who practiced one move a thousand times, is far deadlier than someone who practiced a thousand moves one time."

Thus Darkness kept training with the sword. She kept up that one slashing motion, again and again and again.

[I feel nauseated looking at you]

"Hmmph! I'm sorry, teacher! I'll try harder!"

[Congratulation, an expert swordsman will no longer feel the need to vomit from staring at your form]

"Hmmph! Thank you for take the time to train this worthless swordswoman~"

[You are taking this long to master something so basic? Do the world a favor and let go of the blade already. Might as well polish some other type of sword, for all the good that grip of yours does]

"Hmmph! To be told I'm only good as a scarlet woman? Hmmph! ...No, no, I should focus more on training. A stronger grip, got it."

Darkness kept training. She had started from dawn, improving bit by bit with the guidance of the enchanted sword, it's insult acting as a milestone for her.

However after a certain point, the insults became less frequent, till eventually they stopped. Darkness kept practicing, yet the more time she spend in silence, the more frustrated she grew. A good emotion to experience but not the one she wanted right now.

It never occurred to her that the blade would simple stop talking, when there was no more room for improvement.

Thus Darkness kept training futilely till the sun reached its zenith.

[Are you a stupid monkey that can only repeat the one thing it saw?]

"Hmmmmph!!" Darkness nearly lost her balance as the insults finally returned after nearly three hours of silence. "Hah, hah, hah, that was the best in a while. Why did it take so long?--Wait, what teacher just said, am I meant to change forms?"

[Are you human or a retarded goldfish? GET TO THE NEXT MOVE!] This time, the sword answered on it's own.

"Y-y-yes, teacher!" Darkness took a different stance. Before she could begin though, she looked at the blade questioningly. "Did Michael put a function to tell me to change practice routines, once I perfected one of the moves?" Darkness smiled at Michael's thoughtfulness to add a message for her to move on to the next practice routine.

Darkness took a different stance, sword at her side, and swung horizontally.

She was met with silence.

"Hah, hah, and now the silence treatment starts again. Hmmph, I wonder what other degradation will be heaped on me!"

===x===

Darkness ended up training until sunset. She would have kept going had Michael not asked at the guild to see where she was, and went to to the training ground on a hunch, upon finding no one saw her all day.

"Darkness?" Michael approached cautiously, seeing as the Crusader was continuously swinging the blade, with her panting loud enough to echo, followed by the whistling of the wind from the sword's slashing.

"Yes, teacher what is it?" Darkness stopped, and readied herself looking at the blade in her hands in excitement.

"Teacher?" Michael asked.

"Aaah, s-should calling you, M-Master!?" Darkness shouted the last word almost like she was about to burst.

"What?" Michael was taken aback by his potential teammates attitude. "No! Darkness, it's me, Michael. Turn around."

"Eh?" Darkness mumbled at how weird this erotic play is, before turning around to see the actual Dark Paladin before her, rather than his voice projected from the sword. "Aaaah! Michael, why are you here?" Darkness felt embarrassed about having an audience, and then felt joy from that embarrassment. "Don't worry, I've been keeping up with my training. You'll see how I improved by the end." She said with conviction.

"Yes, I can see that." Michael said slowly. He could see the sword marks on the grass and ground around Darkness, but that was not the source of his worry. "Did you...leave to eat or rest at all from this morning?"

"This morning?" Darkness as if just realizing it, looked at the horizon to see the sun's red disk setting. "It's," she blinked in surprise. "It's evening!?"

"Yes!" Michael shouted wide-eyed. "Did you seriously not notice the time?"

"Aaaah, no." Darkness blush and looked aside, suddenly looking nervous. She sheathed the enchanted sword, as she tried to think of an excuse to tell Michael. "I was took focused on training. I wanted to experience, I mean, I wanted to pass your examination." She looked back at Michael hoping he bought her excuse, only to be met with a dry scowl. "Hmmph! That glare~." He didn't buy it.

"Darkness," Michael's disapproving tone just turned Darkness further on, but he didn't stop, as needinf to address her actions was more urgent. "You can't just train non-stop for hours on end. That how your cripple yourself!"

"Fear not! My Endurance is high enough that I can still go on." Darkness gave an unconvincing thumbs up.

"Your legs are shaking, you can barely stand." Michael pointed and deadpanned.

"That's because I need to keep moving. You can stand still on a battlefield." She quickly countered.

"That's..." Michael sighed as he pinched the bridge of his nose. He decided not to make this a debate. "Look, either you add periods of rest in your training, and make sure to eat and drink water, or I'm taking the sword."

"NO!" For the first time, Darkness looked something other than constantly high on ecstasy, as she hugged the sword to her chest, frightened with nearly tears in her eyes. "You can't take my teacher away from me. Please Michael, I'll do anything--"

"Darkness," Michael raised a finger, as he spoke with a firm tone, ending her rant. "Take care of yourself and I won't have to take the sword away." He narrowed his eyes. "Do you understand me?"

"Yes, yes! I do!" She vigorously nodded.

"Right now go res...Oooph." Michael covered his face as he finally noticed the smell. "Nevermind, go take a shower your stink."

"Y-you can't say that to a lady!" For the first time in Michael's experience, rather than be turned on by something degrading her, Darkness acted more like a Lady, and blushed with indignation at the Dark Paladin's comments.

"Being polite isn't gonna change what I'm smelling." Darkness pouted as her blush intensified. "Go take a shower, I'll have a meal prepared for you at the guild, then go to bed. I'll ask Aqua if there are spells to help with resting." Michael began walking backwards. "I'll see you at the guild in an hour and a half, if you're not there by three hours, I'll find you and take the sword."

Darkness hugged the sheathed sword tighter to her chest like it was her child, and forced herself through her tiredness to walk behind Michael back to Axel.

===x===

5 Days Ago

It was a new day and Darkness the Crusader, unlike those who knew and partied with her, couldn't wait to improve her swordsmanship.

She went back to the same training area of yesterday, and immediately got back into the swing of things.

[Worthless sow, only good to be used for breeding. You call that footwork!? When you're attacking, front foot pointed forward. When you're defending, front foot still pointing forward, you useless meathole! How else can you dig into the ground to stand your position? Front foot is only angled for when you need to pivot, you disgrace of all warriors!]

"Yes! Yes, teacher! I'll correct it immediately!" Darkness moaned with a wide grin. Pure joy erupting from her being.

However all too soon the "fun" ended.

Because something that neither Darkness nor Michael accounted for had happened.

"Wh...why isn't Teacher talking anymore?" Darkness whined on the verge of tears.

It was still early in the morning on her second day, before noon had yet to come, and Darkness had master all nine sword moves Michael had shown her.

"Maybe...Maybe if I keep trying..." Darkness went back through the first three moves from the attacking sword style.

Darkness tried every move she learned in the attack sword style for an hour, and the sword stayed silent. She did the same with the other, and the blade did not rebuke her. In her frustration she transitioned too fast between moves.

[Are you knight so fucked in the head on honor, you're pausing between each attack? Move, you hedonistic trash!]

"W-what? Yes, Teacher!" Like a student now used to their teacher's attitude and temperament, Darkness repeated two moves from one sword style, in quick sequence...

[Truly, when they speak of 'Dumb Blondes' you are the ur-example they must be referencing. Learn to walk you useless mouth-breather! Do not lose your balance when switching between attacks!]

"Of course, Teacher! I'm an idiotic animal that needs instructions explained plainly for her~."

By luck and without any direction, Darkness stumbled on her next step in training. Using the moves she learned to build a sequence of actions.

Thus for that day, Darkness learned the sequences of swordplay using the moves she previously learned, and even how to switch between styles.

===x===

Meanwhile, as Darkness trained, Michael and Aqua went to find part time jobs in Axel.

"How about being street performers?" Michael suggested. "You already have all the Party Tricks Skill Tree, and you look like you have fun whenever you do it."

"I'm not taking money for practicing my art!" Aqua instantly objected. "I'm a Patron of the Arts, Michael! Such vocation mustn't be cheapened by desiring worldly possessions." Aqua spoke passionately with her fist on her heart, and she looked to the sky in an inspiring manner.

"Well currently, you don't have the worldly possessions to get a room to sleep tonight." Michael replied with a calm chuckle.

Naturally Aqua lost her pose and charisma, the reality of an adventurer's life ripping apart her graceful inspiring look.

"But, but didn't you do a kill quest this morning?" Aqua questioned.

"Yes...but that's my money."Michael said, having been the one to do the kill quest alone as Aqua wanted to sleep in.

"Ne, ne, Michael, Michael?" Aqua grabbed Michae's sleeve and gently tucked on it.

"Yes, Aqua?" Michael had an amused look, already knowing what's coming.

"Can you lend me some money?" The goddess smiled brightly.

"No." Michael smiled back, and immediately shut her down.

"WWAAAAAAHHYYY!?" Aqua dropped to her knees and shouted to the heavens.

"Wow, bravo," Michael gave a golf clap, looking impress. "Very impactful. Really felt the despair in that."

"Michael, Come oooo~on!" Aqua pulled Michael's shirt while still on the ground with tears in her eyes. "Please give me some money."

"First off, stand up." Michael took Aqua by her arms to help her stand. When she went limp, he held her from her armpits like a child and lifted her in the air.

It was like some odd parent child pose of one holding up the other, except both were adults, and both stared on the other in a deadpan motion.

"Mommy, what are they doing?"

"Shush, son. Don't look at the weird people."

"Is that some sort of street play?"

"Maybe it's sex thing?"

"Should we throw them money, so they continue the second part of this play, or something?"

"I dunno, it feels like body expression art, but their motions and looks aren't trying to capture a still image of real life, they are far too dynamic. It falls on between the edges of play statue art, and a street performance, and it just comes off weaker because of it."

"Dust...are you high again?"

"Oh yeah, very much so."

As the people, adventurers and one city guard commented on the scene, some just noting it and walking, and other stopping to see what's going on, Michael and Aqua were in a battle of wills on who can ignore how silly they looked the longest.

"Aqua?" Michael's neutral tone, showed how utterly done he was this situation.

"Yes, Michael?" Aqua's equally dry replied conveyed, she just didn't wanna lose.

"This is embarrassing." He stated.

"Yes it is." She agreed.

"If I put you down, will you stand on your own?"

"If I do, will you give me money?"

"Wasn't it lead a moment ago?" Michael raised an eyebrow.

"I've altered the deal, pray I don't alter it further." Aqua desperately tried to keep her deadpan face up, and not lose cool points by smirking. "Also if you're going to pray, pray to me."

If Michael's dry look could get an drier, he could have started a desert.

"Aqua, I don't pray to gods. Also quoting 'Star Wars'? Really?"

"It's a classic!" Aqua frowned, breaking her stoic expression, and Michael took that as a sign to drop her.

"AAAAAAH!" Aqua treated the drop of a foot off the ground like a cliff fall. "Oooowww, how could you drop a goddess on her ass?"

"When said goddess wants to act like a child, I will." Michael said back with a lopsided smile. "I mean, seriously I already explained the concept of a body's center of gravity and how it relates to balance in martial arts." Michael smirked. "As a Patron of the Arts, shouldn't you have already understood that concept, along with how to take a fall?"

"I'll show you, Martial Arts! WAHT-AH!" In a fit of rage, Aqua jumped up, and just from having watch Michael's morning practice of some fighting moves, she executed a perfect Jeet Kun Do punch. Lunging with one foot, the other ready to end her lunge on a stance, her arm extended out, ready to strike but slightly loose, so momentum would be transferred to the opponent the moment she stamps on the ground with her front foot, and a simple extend and tightening of her extended arm, so no energy slides back.

It was beyond impressive for someone to master a martial arts move, just by seeing it, but that's a goddess for you. Which was why, Michael wasn't surprised by her managing to learn to fight just by watching him, and him explaining some points.

Thus Michael instinctively was ready to move, and responded by spinning out of the way, leaning into her personal space, grabbing her shirt, twisting and judo throwing her in the air.

Aqua did a somersault and landed on her feet with her arms spread in a Y-shape up.

"Woooo!"

"Yeaaa!"

"Bravoooo!"

The current audience cheered, and Aqua took in all their praise forgetting her argument with Michael.

"Aqua," Michael approached the goddess who looked back to him, while still waving to the crowd. "Let's go find a job together. That way we both would have our own personal spending money, for what we want to do on our own time, okay?"

Aqua smiled, nodded and skipped to her chosen adventurer.

Michael smiled that things ended amicably.

Aqua grabbed Michael's shirt, spun, and judo threw him into the air.

===x===

Later on, Michael and Aqua got a job in a local theater as a stuntman and stuntwoman.

Aqua refused pay, so Michael paid for her meals and drinks that day.

===x===

4 Days Ago

"You know I didn't expect a Dark Paladin to be this hardworking." Said Jo Foreman, the, well, foreman of the construction crew on the wall repairs.

"It's just beginner's enthusiasm. Give it a month and I'll be a slacker like everyone else." Michael said as he carried a literal ton of wood with each, to each section that required it.

"Gaahahahaha, at least you're honest." Jo good-naturedly smacked Michael's back, to which the adventurer just chuckled at the foreman's boisterous attitude, and continued to work.

"Oooh, she really is amazing at painting the walls."

"I've never seen the paint job look to fresh and clean."

Some of the workers had stopped to admired Aqua's handiwork. Michael supposed that even for something like just painting the finished walls, since it was a Goddess doing it, it looked masterful.

Aqua looked back, taking in people's praises before her eyes landed on him. Michael waved and gave a nod acknowledging her work, to which Aqua beamed and got back into her job with enthusiasm.

Michael also reminded himself to make lunches for Aqua and Darkness later on, at the end of the day for their hard work.

===x===

[Not bad, cum for brains. Not bad]

"Hmmph!"

That day Darkness had learned how and mastered the basics of the three sword styles Michael showed her. She even learned how to switch styles on the fly to adapt to any situation.

Still, all she knew were still the basics. Although her Endurance and improved Dexterity puts her leagues above most people.

[Don't celebrate yet. You are now as competent as someone who doesn't stab their feet with every step. You are only slightly less worthless, sow]

"Hmmph! Yes, Teacher, I won't forget my place. But what else can I do to improve and hear your voice?"

[Constant bitch in heat, aren't you? Can you not stop and think for a moment? You have already seen all sword styles in their entirety. Start practicing the intermediate moves, their sequences, style switching, then do the same for the advanced and then the master. Do I seriously need to explain something this simple?]

The sheer condensation and disgust in the voice nearly brought Darkness to a full on orgasm.

"But, but I only saw it once." Darkness said, her voice trembling with worry. She didn't want to disappoint her teacher. Not in a bad way.

[Meditate and remember. Visualize the sword arts in your mind. If you can not do that...there is no reason for me to speak to you anymore]

Darkness instantly meditating, almost dragging the memory of the first day of training tooth and nail, from her mind to remember how Michael moved, and sword motions from that day.

===x===

3 Days Ago

On this day, within the guild mess hall, as had been for the past few days, the daughter of the Chief, the one destined to one day lead the Crimson Demon Clan, sat alone in the corner. She watching the quest board like a hawk, waiting for someone to read her quest, and be willing to accept it.

Yunyun stared at the quest board, waiting for her future party member to show up.

Any moment. Any moment now, someone will approach the board, read her sign and be her friend.

There!

Yunyun stared with restrained excitement as someone approached the board. They looked left, right...they read her recruitment flyer!

They tensed as they looked her way. ...They quietly scurried away.

Yunyun looked down at her table. Why didn't it work? She should have expected this. She had gotten her hopes up, and it was dashed away.

No. She can't give up now. Maybe if she acted like she wasn't looking at the quest board, then someone might read her flyer and come to her. What was it called? 'Playing hard to get'?

Yunyun felt someone approaching. She looked up to see a person with black hair, and black themed clothing heading toward her. She felt hope rise in her chest. Maybe this is it, they really want to talk to her and befriend her.

She looked away. What if they are just heading in her direction and were going to another table?

Yunyun looked up to see the person approach. They were looking right at her. She looked aside, not wanting to give away her anticipation of finally meeting a new friend. Maybe a new friend.

"Excuse me, is this seat taken?" Came the polite mature voice.

"N-No not at all!" Yunyun looked up actually taking a good look at the adventurer, now that he was up close. "Nice to meet you," her mouth had began to move, having memorized her introduction speech and practiced it in front of the mirror in the morning dozen of times. "I'm called Yunyun. My Job is that of an Arch Wizard even though I can only use Intermediate Magic." Yunyun found herself blush as her mouth ran on it's own. The adventurer face was handsome, in that way that came to people who were wise from being well traveled.

"Nice to meet you, Yunyun." He answered with a smile. He didn't make fun of my name! Yunyun wanted to jump in her seat. She heard that people outside of their Clan found their names weird, and she didn't realized how much that was so until she left the village and traveled. Yet here was someone that didn't dismiss her name out of hand. "I'm Michael. My Job is Dark Paladin."

"...Ah." She should have realized it was too good to be true. Yunyun averted her eyes from him.

Dark Paladin, those who fight for good but took a dark path, they personal one to achieve the justice they envision. It's no wonder he would want party with a Crimson Demon.

After all...Dark Paladins are just as eccentric in their speech and conduct as Crimson Demons.

Would he be disappointed if I wasn't what he expected a Crimson Demon to be? No, it's fine. I practiced a lot just for this moment. 

"Yes, I know. I know."

"Eh?" Yunyun looked back at Michael in puzzlement.

"Dark Paladins are seen as scary, but I'm only here to talk. I promise, I'm basically harmless."

What is he talking about? He's not boasting his power and strength, or other things, like you would expect a Dark Paladin to do. ...Could it be? Is...Is he like me?

"Ah, no. I'm not scared. Really." At his understanding look, Yunyun felt compiled to insist that he got the wrong impression. "Honest."

"Okay, okay, I believe you." Michael raised his palms, as a gesture to placate her. "To tell the truth I am looking for a Magic User for my party, as it could use some variety. However, we can talk about a possible meet up, or temporary contract at a later date if you wish, so you can see if you would like to join my party or not."

"Ah, that's not...I mean...yes thank you." Yunyun looked down not meeting Michael's eyes. She felt ashamed that she took the easy way out, rather than correct his assumptions that she felt uncomfortable about his Job. "S-so, what, um, should we talk about?"

"Well first, I wanted to find out about a rumor. It is true that Crimson Demon's eyes glow when they're angry. It's just that, they glowed a lot while I was coming over, so I wanted to find out what I did wrong and apologize." Michael scratched his cheek while smiling sheepishly.

"No!" Yunyun shouted before her voice turned quiet and squeaky. "That's not, that's not it. It's not because we're angry." Yunyun hated how weak her voice had gotten. He would misunderstand now and leave in a hurry.

"Phew, so it's not that. I'm glad I didn't incur the wrath of the all powerful Crimson Demon." Michael chuckled.

He heard me! "You didn't!" Yunyun nearly shouted. "I'm not mad, and I would never act out of..." At his look of amusement, Yunyun realized that he was just joking about 'incurring her wrath'. He was just saying that in good fun.

Like what friends do! She realized. Or is this mocking...that...happens in big cities right?

"Right, I am ever thankful." Michael grinned in a cheerful manner.

"Ah, thanks." Yunyun replied falling back onto being demure.

Seeing how the young girl responded, Michael eased up on the energetic energy, and acted a bit more reserved.

"So, how long have you been an Adventurer? Got any stories from quests yet?" Michael started off with a simple topic to get Yunyun to open up.

"It's been a few days, but, ah yes, I did go on a few quests! Such as..."

And so Michael and Yunyun talked for a while. Yunyun mostly talked about her days in her village, as she felt she didn't have adventuring stories worth mentioning.

Michael spoke about his adventuring days, despite how one can count those on one hand, getting into the role of a storyteller.

"Thus after managing a Giant Toad kill quest of my own, it was time to see how my current and hopefully future teammate would fair." Michael said theatrically, his voice like that of a detective uncovering clues.

Yunyun listened with intense attention. Her eyes glowing while looking at Michael.

"First was our Arch Priest. Yes, she is a healer but her stats are high enough that she could take a combat role if she wished. On quests, while party members supporting each other is paramount, it is important to be sure that they each can defend themselves should anything happen, and they separate for a while."

Yunyun started taking notes.

"And so Aqua stepped forward, moving instantly on the offensive, not giving even these low level monster a chance."

Yunyun nodded, a stern expression of focus on her face.

"She gathered up her holy power in her hand, dashing forward at the beast, weaving and moving to and fro, so even if the toad had a chance to attack it would hit nothing but air. She jumped into the air her fist drawn back, threw her fist forward with the courage and determination in her heart and!"

Yunyun's eyes glowered brighter as Michael's story escalated. Her blood pumping at the retelling of the action.

Michael's theatrics, voice and arm movement as he tried to paint a picture of the scene, and the actions of the "protagonist" vividly for Yunyun yo envision. She overlayed the image of a brave Arch Priest over that of Michael with his arm pulled back. She imaged said Arch Priest stepping up to fight for when her comrades couldn't (ignoring how said Arch Priest should just heal everyone). Yunyun imaged the Arch Priest throwing a punch infused with the power of her goddess and knocking the Giant Toad in the air--

"Nothing happened."

Thunk.

"W-What!?" Yunyun was so excited that she hit her head on the table from how disappointing that ending was.

"Yeeeeah, turns out that being an Arch Priest of the Goddess Aqua means that her magical energy is infused with both Holy and Water type affinity. Meaning that while Giant Toads would normally be considered joke enemies for beginners to get their adventuring fangs sharpened on, they take basically no damage from anything related to water." Michael chuckled toward the end of his explanation.

Yunyun's shoulders began to shake. To anyone observing they would think the Dark Paladin had angered the Crimson Demon and a fight was about to breakout.

Michael knew the girl was just trying her hardest not to laugh.

"And then because somehow Aqua offended every Giant Toad in half of a mile, four other toads showed up to try and eat her. They even had a tug of war and even injured themselves trying to be the one to beat her."

Yunyun's shoulders shaking intensified.

"I didn't even know that monsters can be offended. Or did she maybe brag so much about how easy of an opponent they are, they developed the capacity to be angry."

Yunyun was barely hanging on. No, she could laugh at her possible new friend's teammate.

"And then while the toads were fighting to get her, Yunyun look at me, Aqua made this face." Yunyun looked up to see Michael making a comical face of fear and panic, like someone screaming from terror and ugly crying.

"PPFFFFT-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Yunyun instantly laughed, she could no longer control herself. "I-hahaha-I'm sorry, hahahaha, I didn't mean to, hahah haha, laugh at your friend, hahahahaha, I ahahahah swear."

"It's fine, I said that because it's a funny story. It's meant to make you laughed." Michael leaned back into his chair, glad to see the kid had brightened up, instead of being gloomy and nervous while sitting there.

He waited for her to calm down, getting them both glasses of water, as Yunyun finally gathered her breath enough to talk again.

"Is, is your teammate alright?" She asked, suddenly feeling guilty that she might have laughed at someone who was injured or worse.

"Absolutely," Michael's wide smile reassured her. "She's well enough to get us fired from a part time job this morning."

"Eh?"

Michael explained how he and Aqua would do part-time work between quests, and that today they were in a stall selling fruit, which Aqua made disappear with a sheet cover magic trick (the stage magician kind, not the mage kind), when trying to gather some customers.

"Apparently, she doesn't know how her Party Tricks work, as we could not get that box of oranges back, and had to pay for it ourselves." Michael shook his head in exasperation, but didn't seem like he was really bothered by it.

"Ehehehe," Yunyun quietly chuckled while wonder if Michael's teammate is all that right in the head.

"Can I ask you something?" Michael said, to which Yunyun nodded without reserve having grew comfortable around the Dark Paladin.

"How come you haven't joined any party yet?" Michael asked, to which Yunyun stiffened. "Even with just Intermediate Magic, that still makes you a very appealing party member, as a Crimson Demon, it should be easy for you to gain levels and Skill Points, to unlock higher levels of magic later on. Even with just what you can do now, you can work at nearly all ranges in a party formations, and give your allies a very good safety blanket, as they do the same for you."

As Michael spoke, Yunyun drew in on herself, worried on how to answer that question, that she might upset her new friend.

"Ah...that is..." She tried to formulate a response, closing her eyes to think.

What could she say? How can she explain that she wasn't good with people without looking lame? How can she tell him that people just didn't want to deal with her? That they found her annoying, or slow, or scary?

Yunyun kept thinking and thinking of a clear good response. Her mind kept going in circles as she thought of an answer.

Then she realized that she hadn't said anything for a long time.

No! Did she mess up? Did her new friend get upset at her? Did he leave because she was silent for too long? She kept imaging all kinds of scenarios that would happen when she opened her eyes. Eventually landing on the seat in front of her being empty.

Yunyun opened her eyes, and...Michael was still there, leaning against the table.

He didn't look angry or even annoyed. He just sat there waiting for her with a patient look, telling her to take her time.

"I..." she began. "I wanted to...join a party and make friends. It's just that..." Yunyun started talking, bit by bit able to speak more about what bothered her since arriving at Axel, while looking down at the table. "Other parties don't want me. They think I'm a nuisance, or at one time scary, because of my Clan's reputation. I even thought about posting a flyer asking for advice, because I couldn't get anyone willing to join me till now." Yunyun looked up at Michael with a sad pouty look. "I don't know what I'm doing wrong." She gathered her courage like that Arch Priest facing the Giant Toads, remembered too late how said healer spectacularly failed. "Can...can you please tell me how to make friends?"

"Hmm," Michael leaned back into his chair, crossed his arms and looked to the ceiling. For a moment Yunyun worried she offended him in someway, but no, Michael had been nice to her so far, he wouldn't be bothered by her question, right? "You know when we're kids, like much younger than seven or so, it's easy to make friends. You can just go to someone and say 'hey wanna be friends?'." Michael looked back at Yunyun, with that vibe like he was about to tell a story. "The reason for doing that could be as simple as liking the same toys or even colors. Or even just going 'This one. I like this one'." Michael chuckled, which made Yunyun do so on her own remembering how she met her best friend--Rival! Her rival, Megumin.

"But as we grow older," Michael continued. "Relationships and communications become more complex. It's...something that just happens." He shrugged. Yunyun frowned as she knew how true that was. "The thing is, there isn't a way to just ask someone for confirmation, since it would seem awkward, and they might say yes just to seem polite, or not like a bad person."

"Yeah...I know." Yunyun looked down as she understood that truth.

"But," Michael's hopeful tone, made Yunyun look back up again, wide-eyed and waiting for the older adventurer's wisdom. "What happens when we're older is that, we get introduced to new people, either by others, or we meet them on a job, or we just happen to strike a conversation for one reason or another. Then you just ask the other person if they want to hang out to do another job, or just to get something to eat and hang out talking without worrying on the subject."

Yunyun's mouth was ajar as the Dark Paladin began explaining social interactions, and their complexities in a more simple manner. He took the time to do something that, no adult in her life could bother with or manage.

"...Relationships are complicated." He concluded. "But friendship is thankfully on the more simpler side. When you reach the point of being comfortable in the other person's presence, that you can arrange a time to meet up for no reason other than just to see them, or that they don't mind you around them, and you don't mind them being around you. At that point, does the question even need to be asked?"

Yunyun's eyes glowed in wonderment. It was like someone had given her a map to a world, that was too difficult for her to navigate through.

"Yes, not every friend you make you'll feel close to, but you don't have to. Not every friend needs to be a best friend, a good friend, or just an acquaintance. Let them fall into whichever category based on how you feel. If you think you want to know them more, to see if you are compatible then just ask them to hang out. Tell them that. The important thing is, to talk to people, but to also let them speak and listen to them." Michael emphasized. "If you make assumptions then you'll only have the image you came up with in your mind, you'll never know how close or inaccurate it is to the real thing. If you interact with someone, and say help them fight some monsters off and leave, you'll never know if they'll thank you or condemn you. But it's important to have the courage to listen either way. You may not be able to control how other people act, but you can control how you do."

As Michael finished giving his advice, Yunyun who was holding her composure all the while started crying.

"Eh? Ah? Sorry, I didn't mean to upset you." Michael stood up to see if the girl was alright, wondering where he messed up.

"No, no, I'm...I'm okay. Thank you. ...Thank you." Yunyun smiled through the tears at having someone really take the time to talk to her and help her out.

His words confirmed something she always knew but was too afraid to brouch the subject of. She now knew without a doubt that Megumin was her friend. Yet it opened another schism in the introverted Crimson Demon as she didn't know how to reconcile Megumin with being both her friend and her rival.

But that's a story for another time.

At the present however, Michael's reputation took another hit, as people now spoke about how he could made even the infamous Crimson Demons cry in terror.

===x===

[So you are finally acceptable. I suppose you aren't worthless after all...but it doesn't change that you're a pig living onlyu on its instincts. Seek nothing but pleasure]

"Hmmph! Yes, thank you, Teacher. I'm sorry for being so filthy~"

Darkness had recalled Michael's demonstration in clear details. She started practicing the moves of each sword style, trying to master each one at a time.

She had become well versed in each style, able to use each with expert proficiency. Soon, she would reach master in all sword styles and receive the ultimate reward.

Surely Michael had prepared something special for when she mastered those sword styles. So she kept on training till the promised day to show him.

Soon.

===x===

2 Days Ago

"Hmmm," Michael looked at quest board a bit irked.

"Hmmm, Michael, Michael." Aqua was imitating him, before tapping him on the shoulder.

"Yes, Aqua?"

Her lips twitched into a smile before she focused at what she wanted to bring to his attention.

"What about this one?"

"No, we are not going to be test subjects to another mage's experiments. ...Maybe Darkness would like that." Michael chuckled.

Aqua snorted then she asked him, "but don't you have magic resistance due to being a magus?"

"Not to intentionally take a spell to the face." Michael replied.

"Excuse me, Mr. Chaser?"

Aqua and Michael turned to see a guild employee addressing them.

"Yes?"

"Umm, the guild has a personal request for you, aah, that is if you are okay with it, sir." The woman nervously said.

"Personal request?" Michael shared a confused look with Aqua, to which the Arch Priest just shrugged her shoulder. "What is it about?" He turned to ask the lady.

"Well..."

===x===

"Isn't this a bit ridiculous?" Michael wondered at he stared at the man standing across from him at his own table.

"Hell no! I will stand for you, walking around like you own the kitchens any longer. The guild's kitchen isn't big enough for the both of us!" Said guild's premier chef, Durian, who glared and pointed challengely at the Dark Paladin.

For the past few days, Michael had been paying the guild to rent a place in their kitchen, to cook meals as a reward for Aqua and Darkness at the end of the day for their hard work.

The problem was, his food looked and smelled so good, that the guild suffered complains from people wanting the same food and couldn't get it, or brawls would start with people trying to steal the food leading to Michael kung-fuing his way into making sure his companions could finish their meals.

The guild was easily about to repay the damages from the adventurers who started the fights, but when the guild members starting asking if they could hired Michael part-time, Durian snapped and demanded a cook-off, with the loser parred from entering the kitchens anymore.

Thus Michael and Durian stood in the middle on the guild each with a table of their own, with their ingredients on it.

The judge's table heading both chefs table, consisted of Oliver the guild's headmaster (mostly just the manager keeping the place running).

Sena, who was passing by after hearing about the commotion, and decided to participate. For fairness.

And finally Aqua.

"How did you get on the judge's table?" Michael asked.

"As a Patron of the Arts, how could I not be a judge on this fantastic endeavor." Aqua said haughtily with her hand on her chest.

"You just want the free food." Aqua stumbled in her seat, and tried to play it off as nothing. "Also that didn't answer my question." Aqua didn't meet his eyes, and whistled innocently. "Did she bully her way in?"

""No"" Said the other judges.

Bing.

Sena's truth bell rang.

"...Sena, do you carry that thing around with you, even off the clock?" Michael asked pointing to the magical lie detector.

"...No comment."

Bing.

"..."

"..."

Apparently that counted as a lie. No one said anything about this awkward situation, and collectively agreed to move on.

The cooking match started in earnest.

"Go get him, Michael!

"Do you best, Mr. Chaser."

"It's okay if you lose, Chef Durain, in fact could you please do so."

The audience started cheering, along with some of the other chefs in the guild.

"Traitors! You won't at least your comrade whom you've known for years!" Durian shouted.

Some people awkwardly tried to defend themselves, other outright told Durian to lose so they can eat the better food.

From the perspective of the audience and judges, the match felt like it was taking too long. The cooking process seemed just as inciting as eating the finished product itself.

Chef Durian made steak stripes with shrimp and lemon sauce, challenging Michael's first dish, that made the Dark Paladin's cooking skill known. He knew with his own high cooking skills, he can easily beat the Dark Paladin.

This invading chef will know defeat, and sully the halls of his kitchen no longer!

Michael made pizza.

Michael won. He also made enough for everyone in the guild, thus the guild employees, adventurers and people present that day celebrated, with delicious food and cheer all around.

Durian appointed Michael as his rival and left, vowing to travel the land, gain more experience and come back to settle things in another cooking match once and for all.

===x===

In her training ground, Darkness danced with the sword. Smoothly going from one kata to the next, like a battle angel made of metal, violence and elegance.

No one who knew Darkness before she started to train with enchanted sword, would be able to reconcile the clumsy woman who couldn't hit a target right in front of her, with this beauty of strength and steel.

She moved, made another twist, thrust, spun forward, and finally swung the blade in an arc from back to front with a shout.

"HAA!"

The ground was sliced clean in front of her.

Darkness could feel the heat and the strain on her body as she finally finished the last final moves.

The only question left would be, if she had done it.

Would her Teacher praise her now?

[Good job, Darkness. I'm proud of you]

Darkness stood back staring at the sword in blank incomprehension.

"...That's it?"

Surely...surely that can't be it right.

She could feel a glow in her chest from the praise but, but...

"THAT'S NOT ENOUGH!" She shouted. "Come on, where are the real insults!? The magnum ops of degradation and humiliation. This type of denial play isn't fair after everything!"

Darkness moved again, doing the last sequence of sword moves, involving all three sword styles at their highest level.

She dance, moved, slashed, and weave, twist, thrust, spun forward, and finally swung the blade in an arc from back to front with a shout.

"HAA!"

She ended her swordplay in the same position as her first time.

[Good job, Darkness. I'm proud of you]

The same message played again.

"Hmmmnnn," Darkness whined and pouted. "...is not fair."

[...But that's not good enough for you is it?]

"Eh?" Darkness started at the sword with new surprise. "Is, is this another message? A secret message?" She wondered.

[I mean, quite honestly Darkness, you just can't keep well enough alone, can you?]

"I...I just wanted my reward!" She said hastely, not sure why she was feeling defensive.

[Reward? ...Ah yes, a reward. No]

"Hmmmph! That denial~ but it's not enough. "

[Of course, it wasn't enough for you, you masochistic bitch. But then again it never is]

"Hmmmph! Yes, more~." Darkness was reveed up, feeling the blade's speech building up to something bigger. Something better.

[I could call you every insult in the book. Pig. Slut. Whore. Dog. Trash. Useless. Failure]

"Hmmmph!"

[But do you know why above all else, why that isn't a reward?]

"Wha...why?" Darkness moan in anticipation.

[Because you have achieved nothing]

"Hmmmph!"

[Did you think mastering three generic sword styles meant you are now a swordswoman of note? You have reached the status of being a single eris a dozen. As interchangeable as piece of broken armor or a sleeve. Why shouldn't I just changed you for a better wielder?]

"Hmmmph, no! Please Teacher, keep teaching me, keep guiding me."

[Hoo? And why should I bother? All you have managed was to learn three sword styles. You have not made them your own, went beyond the teaching to take your skill to new height. You are a worthless docile pig, content to be feed what it's given each day. Never striving for more! Never reaching beyond what you have gained to truly ascend. To reach the peak, the zenith of the sword, and then go further beyond that. But you wouldn't, would you sow. You would be content with what you have, like a cat]

"Hmmmph!" She could feel really close to something, the ultimate pleasure beyond the horizon, only held back by a string of reason. "I want to reach height. I want to be better! I beg you, Teacher. Show me, take me there, please."

[You misunderstand, Darkness]

"Eh?"

[You will never achieve greatness, you failure knight]

"HMMMPH!" Close, so close now. She should stop. Something was off with her training sword, but, but...she should at least see what's wrong with it, before turning it over to Michael, right?

[I, on the other hand, can easily grasp it. After all, wouldn't a sword clearly be the best at the path of swordsmanship]

"Then...then what about me?"

[I have no need for you any longer. You may leave and fade away into obscurity, like the worthless trash you are]

"Hmmmph! But, but..."

[Unless]

"Yes! Anything!"

[Well, I do require a user of some capacity. I suppose you will do, until I fine someone better, then discard and forget you then]

"HMMMPH!"

[But that's what you want, right Darkness?]

"Y-YES!"

[That's right, it's the job of a tool to be used until it has no use anymore. Is that what you want to be, Darkness?]

"YES, TEACHER! THAT'S WHAT I WANT! USE ME TILL I BREAK!"

[Hahahahaa, aaah, you are enjoyable to play with. I'm not your Teacher anymore of course. For a masochistic slut like you that craves to be conquered and corrupted, for you who wants to be used by her sword, you should know what that makes me, right? ...Pet]

"MAS-MAASTTAAAERR!!"

The damn broke, all reason was gone, and pleasure rushed through Darkness. Her orgasm felt all encompassing, rather than come in pulses, or start from her lower core, and go outward, it was like a heavy wave rippling throughout and overtaking her, till her mind completely blanked out.

Darkness fell to the ground, asleep and finally satisfied. 

And in that empty field near the Beginner's Town, the Sadistic Sword laughed.