14

"Bakit hindi mo sinabi?"

She looked at me, shock was evident in her face. But she composed herself quickly and smiled as if masking the pain she's been feeling.

Isla's ate called me earlier this morning, asking me if alam ko ba kung nasaan si Isla. Of course I said no because the last time that I've seen her was the last day of our examination. Her ate also told me about what happened between her and Iñigo.

"Bakit hindi mo sinabi?" I asked again.

"S-sinabi a-ang... ang alin?" She asked nervously.

I sighed. Pagkatapos kong malaman ang lahat hinanap ko agad siya. She wasn't at her condo, wala din siya sa cafe, so I assumed nandito siya sa simbahan. This church is very special to Isla.

"Alam ko na ang lahat. Your ate told me." She sighed and looked back at the altar. "Bakit hindi mo sinabi?"

She chuckled. "For what?"

"I don't know? Baka damayan kita? Baka samahan kita habang naghihirap ka? Baka kasi kaibigan mo ako? Baka kasi nangako ako sa'yong kahit anong mangyari nandito lang ako para sa'yo?"

"Hindi naman mababawasan ang sakit kahit pa sabihin ko sa inyo diba?" She said absentmindedly.

"Wala akong pake'alam. You should have told me para may kasama ka sa pagharap sa sakit na nararamdaman mo. I may not be able to erase the pain but at least I could be your shoulder to cry on–"

I wasn't able to finish my sentence because her tears are starting to fall. She looked at me.

"I cannot tell you because you were dealing with your own problems. Nagka problema kayo ni Psyche, dumating ang mommy mo, na hospital si lola. I cannot afford to tell you my problems because I know you had a lot on your plate."

She wiped her tears which is very useless because they won't stop falling.

"Hindi ka nanghingi ng tulong sa akin noon. You dealt with your own problems alone and I admire you for being a strong woman. Kaya naisip ko kung nakaya mo, then I think kaya ko rin. I tried to deal with my problems with Iñigo, I tried to hide it away from my family, p-pero... pero ang sakit sakit pa rin. G-gusto kitang tawagan, gusto kong magsumbong sa best friend ko pero hindi ko masikmurang abalahin ka kasi alam ko may mga problema ka rin." She said.

I hugged her tightly hoping that it'll erase the pain she's been feeling. I kept my silence and let her voice out her sufferings. Ang sakit makitang nahihirapan si Isla. She's a good woman kaya hindi ko maintindihan si Iñigo kung bakit niya nagawa yun. How could he possibly hurt my best friend?

After crying for almost an hour, Isla fixed herself and faced the altar again. I'm afraid to say anything because she's at her weakest right now. At feeling ko isang maling salita lang mababasag na siya.

"I told him to marry Lea and be a good father to his child." She chuckled painfully. "Yung pinangarap kong pamilya unti unti nang naglalaho. Yung mga pangako niya, sa iba na niya tutuparin."

"Asther apat na taon ng buhay ko si Iñigo lang ang minahal ko. K-kasama siya sa mga plano ko... paano ko tutuparin yun kung wala na siya sa piling ko?"

She inhaled deeply and wiped her tears again.

"Everything will be okay, right? Tell me, please... kahit false hope lang tatanggapin ko basta't sabihin mo lang na magiging okay din ang lahat. Kahit malabong mangyari okay lang, sabihin mo magiging okay din ang lahat... please..."

I nodded. "Everything will be okay, soon. It's not a false hope, kasi talagang magiging okay din ang lahat."

"How can I move on?" She asked.

"Maybe start on... accepting?"

"How can I accept when I still love him?" She asked, crying again.

"Then don't force yourself to move on. Mourn for your lost love, cry and be angry. You're entitled to feel all those things. And when you're done, acceptance will come." I said.

She nodded.

"Don't worry, I'll be with you throughout this process." I added.

I'm really furious because Isla is hurting deeply. But I know Iñigo has his reasons. I may not understand it, Isla may not accept it but in time, all of these would be worth it. Maybe they're really not meant for each other. Maybe they're just instruments to led each other to the one they're destined to.

If Iñigo will marry Lea out of responsibility, then I'm sure their marriage won't last. And if Iñigo will refuse, then he's about to give his first born an incomplete and broken family. Either way, I know he won't be happy because Isla is his happiness. And his happiness slipped away from him and would never have her back in his arms, whatever and however he do it.

_____

"Grabe, hindi na natin nagagawa 'to noh"

I smiled. Nandito kami sa cafe, killing some time. Ever since my talk with Isla at the church, palagi na kaming magkasama. We basically spent our Christmas break going to wherever we want, shopping, movie marathon, and just talk about anything.

"Oo nga eh, naging busy din kasi tayo sa kanya kanya nating buhay." I said.

"Naging busy ako kay Iñigo. Umikot yung buhay ko sa kanya. I'm sorry if I unintentionally left you alone." She said.

"Ang drama mo." I chuckled. "Okay lang naman kasi sa akin yun. Naiintindihan ko naman."

She smiled. "Okay lang kasi dumating naman ang pinsan ko sa buhay mo hahaha"

"Saya mo ano"

"Shempre! Successful lovelife niyo ni Psyche eh!" She giggled.

"Saya natin ah, naka move on ka na?" I asked sarcastically.

Nagbago agad ang timpla ng mukha niya. "Ba't namemersonal ka?!"

I laughed. Yan kasi, akala mo talaga okay na siya. May pa tawa tawa pa eh halata namang pinipilit lang maging masaya.

"I'm getting there noh hello" She said.

"Hi."

"Ba't ka nag hi?" She asked.

"Sabi mo hello, kaya nag hi ako." I said.

"Ang corny. Napaka walang kwenta mo talagang kausap! Buti tumagal si Psyche sa'yo! Ahh Speaking of Psyche, bumalik na ba siya? March na ngayon ah"

I just shrugged my shoulders. January 30 when they got home from Bali. Then his mom asked if he could join them to Palawan to inspect the land that they wanted to buy. He can't say no to his mom kaya pumayag nalang siya. After that his dad requested for them to celebrate Valentine's at Palawan. Alam ko ayaw niya pero pinagbigyan nalang niya sila tito.

I also wanted him to stay with his family so I could accompany Isla and celebrate Valentine's with her. I know she's so lonely right now, and she needs a friend to be with her as she face this new chapter in her life.

March na nga ngayon but Psyche still hasn't come back. Ang akala ko nga pupunta agad siya ng Cebu after their trip to Palawan eh pero hanggang ngayon hindi pa rin siya nagpapakita sa akin. Though our communication is still there kaya hindi na ako nababahala. I asked him once kung kailan siya pupunta dito sa Cebu but he didn't give me an accurate answer kaya hinayaan ko nalang. Naging busy din naman ako sa pag-aaral at sa pagsama kay Isla.

"Hey, what are your plans after graduation?" I asked Isla.

"Hmm aside sa boards, wala naman na. Siguro magababakasyon ulit ako or maybe I'll practice our profession right away. Nothing's accurate though" She chuckled.

"That's new. For the first time, your answer is not precise."

She just smiled and focused on her readings. I'm really sad for Isla. All her plans includes Iñigo kaya naninibago siguro siya ngayon kasi wala nang Iñigo sa buhay niya. I think I saw him last week sa hospital. Sinasamahan niya siguro yung Lea na magpa check-up. I wonder if he's grown to acknowledge any feelings for that woman?

___

"Happy April fools Astherielle!"

Nilayo ko ng kaunti ang phone sa tainga ko. Isla's been bugging me these past few days. And this is not the first time that she called early in the morning just to greet me Happy April Fools!

"Isla ano ba talagang trip mo sa buhay?! You do know that it's mid April na tapos kinukulit mo pa rin ako sa april fools na yan! You can only greet me when it's April One!" I shouted with a frustrated voice.

I heard her laughter before the line went down. Really, this girl. This is what? The fourteenth time?! Hindi ko na din talaga maintindihan minsan yung trip ni Isla eh.

I was about to go back to sleep when my phone rung again. Without looking at the ID caller, I answered.

"Ano ba! Inaantok pa ako!" I shouted.

"Uh-hm Rielle?"

"Ano bang trip mo– wait, Psyche?"

Only Psyche calls me Rielle. Dali dali akong bumangon at tinignan ang ID caller. It was indeed Psyche!

"Hello?"

"Hey! I'm sorry. Si Isla kasi nangungulit nanaman." I said.

He chuckled. "It's okay. I assumed she woke you up?"

"Yeah"

"And you got pissed because you slept late last night? Or should I say you slept early in the morning?"

I chuckled.

"Anyways, I have a parcel that'll be delivered to you. Sa condo mo ang location na binigay ko. Is it okay if ikaw muna ang tumanggap?"

"Okay. What parcel is it–"

I wasn't able to finish my sentence when I heard a doorbell.

"Oh seems like the parcel is here. May nag doorbell na, ang bilis ah. Wait, puntahan ko lang, don't hung up." I said.

I then waked towards the main door to receive his parcel. Ano nanaman kaya ang inorder niya? The last time that this happened was when he ordered four pairs of shoes. Dalawa sa kanya tapos dalawa din sa akin. Nagustuhan daw niya ang designs at alam niya na magugustuhan ko rin yun. But his main agenda? Para may couple shoes kami kaya naman later that afternoon gusto niya mag date kami tapos same shoes daw dapat. Napaka arte talaga, though I find it sweet yet corny at the same time. Sa kanya ata ako nahawa sa pagiging corny eh.

"Good morning miss Astherielle Vargas. Ito po yung parcel niyo." He said and then handed me a rectangular box.

Ano laman nito? The box has the same structure of that box made for wines.

"How much po?" I asked.

"Nabayaran na po yan ma'am." I nodded. "Pa pirma nalang po dito."

"Thank you." I said and then walked back inside my condo.

"Babe? Na receive mo na?" Psyche asked.

"Yes. What's this?" Tanong ko habang inalog alog ang box.

"Hmm"

"What's this?!"

"Are you that curious?"

"Yes!"

He chuckled. "Okay then, open it. It's for you babe."

"Okay wait, I'll put you on loudspeaker."

The box was wrapped aesthetically. It has an old rose ribbon which serves as its lock. When I opened it I saw a sole of red rose, it doesn't have any thorns on its stem. It was cutted for sure.

There was also a letter that says "04/16", beneath was an address of a secluded flower plantation. I know this place. It's one of my favorites because it has tons of beautiful flowers. Flower plantation siya pero tumatanggap din sila ng mga tourists but with a limited number only.

"What's this?" I asked.

"Flower?"

"Well, obviously. What I meant was, para saan 'to?"

I heard him sighed. "It's for you nga."

"Oh thank you babe."

"You're welcome. And meron pa akong inorder na iba, pwede bang ikaw nalang ang kumuha doon? Wala daw kasing makaka deliver. The location is indicated in the card." He asked.

"Okay. I know this place though." I said.

"Yeah it's your favorite." He said.

Tumango tango ako kahit hindi naman niya makikita.

"Sige maliligo muna ako tapos pupunta na ako doon."

"Okay babe. Wag masydong mabilis sa pagmamaneho ah" He said and then hung up.

I have a feeling na nandoon siya sa flower plantation but then again, medyo malayo dito yun. It'll take about 45 minutes without traffic to get there and I don't think Psyche wouldn't let me drive that long alone.

Binilisan ko nalang ang kilos ko para makapunta na agad ako doon. Good thing walang traffic kaya naka rating agad ako. Pagbaba ko sinalubong agad ako ng staff, siguro tumawag na si Psyche sa kanila na parating na ako kaya naka handa na ang lahat.

I saw different flowers ready for pick-up. I was about to take them when the staff stopped me and says hindi yun ang order para sa akin. I was a bit ashamed beacuse I assumed those beautiful flowers are for me pero hindi pala. Kaya sinundan ko nalang ang staff until he stopped meters away from the biggest gazebo they have in here.

"Ma'am" He pointed at the gazebo. "Nandoon po yung order na mga bulaklak para sa'yo. Puntahan niyo na lang po."

"Okay sige. Salamat po." I said.

I started walking towards the gazebo. It was filled with beautiful roses with different colors arranged in a very smooth way. Flowers really are therapeutic for me. It's just so beautiful that it'll brighten one's ruined day.

"Do you like it?"

I gasped when I heard his voice. Hindi ko pa man nakikita ang mukha niya dahil nasa likod ko siya ay alam ko na agad na si Psyche yun. Sabi ko na eh may pakulo nanaman 'to.

***

:)